Mrs. Nixie Clause's (nixie9) Reviews

Review Requests: OFF

3,474 Public Reviews Given

3,513 Total Reviews Given

Review Style

Template most of the time, covering setting/plot/characters/conflict/resolution if applicable. For shorter works, I concentrate more on feelings evoked.

I'm good at...

Short story, chapter reviews and in-depth reviews.

Favorite Genres

Sci-fi, Romance, mystery, children's

Least Favorite Genres

Historical

Favorite Item Types

Short stories, novel chapters

Least Favorite Item Types

essay, editorial, non-fiction, somebody's homework assignment

I will not review...

XGC, poems, prose. I am an animal activist and vegan, so cruelty or violent, unnecessary, death due to negligence is overwhelming. I am unable to review any pieces involving abuse of any kind to anyone. I like to keep my corner or the world happy, because I grew beyond my "challenges" of childhood and don't want to look back.

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#4791138

Review of Haze

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Hi BScholl. Congratulations on your 15 years of membership.

Let me break from my normal format and kick off with my favorite line because it's remarkable in what it conveys.
I felt powerful in its presence. Somehow, it nourished me, fed me, pumped energy into me.

Interesting, the light wasn't beckoning him to the other side. Rather, it was nourishing him. The plot quickly showed the reader what was wrong with the narrator, by revealing the comment about his head wound. I thought the story would play out as a mystery, but all the paragraphs in the beginning left little doubt.

I also marveled at the sentence about his mom brushing his hair. I wonder if that's what brought him back? Something familiar and pleasant. I liked the description when the mom was introduced.

What a creative way to use the required word (tornado). I would have struggled to fit that in. My only thought that came to mind was how to incorporate the storm into the story. Nicely done!

Oops
I arose from my bed, and walked down the stairs.
(no comma)

In the first paragraph, it pleased me to know he had no fear. In the second sentence, the word (just) can be eliminated.

Comas are scary as some never wake up. The happy ending was touching. You certainly evoked some senses in 298 words. I don't like it when people ask me this kind of question, but where was the dad? Silly me. He didn't fit into the w/c. I guess you could have said (parents), but the mom's actions were much more poignant. It almost seemed as if I were with her.

I enjoy rising to the challenge of FF. Seems you do as well.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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#4790735

Review of Through Yonder Window Breaks (Co - 1st)

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (5.0)

Hi BScholl. Congratulations on your 15 years of membership.

The hook
Perusing through all your FF entries, I chose this one. I liked the title and the brief description.

The comments
From the very first phrase the mood was established. (leotards?) Very humourous. At first I thought Tracy was a woman (because of the name). The scene instantly activates with Tracy's attempts and disastrous failures. I was shocked when he continued, hellbent to rekindle a spark lost in a marriage.

The attempts brought about some awful consequences, and this was both funny and full of action. I felt for the poor man's thorns stuck in his derriere. My mom always used that word.

Personal connection
One time, I climbed a ladder to the roof. I had my cell phone in case of trouble. No problem reaching the roof, but the first thing to go wrong was my cell sliding to the ground.

Final observations
Oh, as if the plot leading to the conclusion was not enough, the ending kicked in with two unexpected twists.

I enjoyed reading this clever piece. Great work here.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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#4790579

Review of My Sweet Miranda

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: ASR

| (4.5)

Hi Dave has company. Congratulations on your 19 years of membership.

The hook
The title and brief description read like a song. I never suspected the conclusion, because the first genre was romance/love, which usually ends as a boring happily ever after.

The comments
Here, we have two separate topics. Love and darkness-- the cartel responsible for the grisly conclusion. The drug cartel felt like a casual mention, a bit off beat.

I sincerely hope this isn't a personal experience. I'm also wondering if "Sweet Miranda" was written for a contest with a word count.

'They' say, life is only a roll of the dice. It's up to us how that roll will play out. Some of us don't get a chance. Our life is cut short in the most unexpected way.

Personal connection
I won't write about my daughter's car crash, she survived, but the seat belt broke her collar bone and scapula. She spent seven days in the hospital.

Final observations
Other than the tragic ending, what really caught my attention was the repetition of how the narrator met Miranda on a cloudy day and then she died on a cloudy day.

Nicely composed.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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#4790412

Review of Ode to Joy

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 18+

| (4.5)

Hi Annie Congratulations on your 19 years of membership.

The hook
OOH. Look what I dredged up from 18 years ago!

What a tease, this title and brief description. I landed on the assumption, most likely, exactly as planned. Surely, this must be an ode for a special person.

The comments
I guess my mind was in the gutter, well, at least in the beginning it sounded a bit, um, sexy? Then I read the line about plaster. That didn't sum up to anything close as expected. Time to reset my thinking and read the last stanza.

Personal connection
I like Almond Joys with nuts. There was a jingle for the choice, "Sometimes I feel like a nut, sometimes I don't."

Suggestions
Larger font, please.

Generally, I'm opposed to exclamation points in writing, specifically in short stories. Here, in this bit of a poem, the exclamation points found a proper home.

Final observations
Candy bars lure me in. At times the siren call can be ignored. But my body insists on a bite or two of chocolate after dinner. I only eat the candy that has dark chocolate--less sugar, more chocolate. Less guilt.

Thanks for the laugh. What a super treat to read this early afternoon. Happy Anniversary.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

5

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#4790297

Review of Beliefs...

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

Hi 🌖 HuntersMoon Congratulations on your 16 years of membership.

The hook
The cover art cracked me up.

Ken, I've always been impressed by your keen sense of humor. In some ways, I envy you. My mind doesn't ride on the rails of positivity. Rather it rides on the opposite side, ever into the dark tunnel. I'm dreaming of changing this someday.

The comments
Normally, I'd avoid a political piece, but knowing how lighthearted and optimistic you are, I wasn't afraid to take a peek. And then once I allowed myself to glance and ensure the Trump name was mentioned, combined with the 'left-leaning' comment, off I went for a careful read.

Personal connection
Um...this is a public review, so I hope those with differing opinions don't read this one. As of now, he's a threat to the little people and, honestly, I'm a little scared. Then I remind myself, nothing happens until it happens. Also, I have no control over what happens, so no need for stress.

Final observations
The rhyming scheme fell into place with accurate remarks concerning the three presidents. Of course, I'm applauding the last stanza and laughing all the while. Nicely done.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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#4790294

Review of Writing Blog Number 2

for entry "20241212 Stages Of Grief"

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)

Hi Santeven Quokklaus Congratulations on your 14 years of membership.

The hook
I wasn't expecting what "20241212 Stages Of Grief"

entailed. I thought it would be about humans (not story characters, who are in a way alive) grieving.

The comments
The article, for lack of a better word, deals with actual fiction stories. Before I read this, I never thought about it. Maybe because I've never killed a character before. It's a fantastic idea.

You mentioned the room as a shrine. We've all moved away from our childhood home, but that's where my sister died. She was only thirty years old. For 10 years, no one was allowed to say her name. I know my mom still struggles. How can a parent overcome the grief of losing a child?

You presented the ideas in an easy to read format, with enough information to acquaint the reader and included a link. You covered every aspect. Well done.

Personal connection
No way am I going into too much of my personal losses. I can say that expected, or unexpected, the loss has no less impact on my life. My people live in my heart forever. As mentioned in one paragraph, The tragedy stays with us.

Final observations
My son, who did 2 tours in Iraq, is exhausted by people saying "Thank you for your service." Much the same, "I'm sorry for your loss," has lost all meaning, but I am sorry for your loss.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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#4790087

Review of What Makes a Cat

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.0)

Hi Rhoswen - Relentless Victory Congratulations on your 8 years of membership.

The hook
I adore cats, so this prose was the obvious pick.

The comments
Watching a cat is relaxing and soothing. In the various lines you capture your experience and the observations.

I hope that mouse was just for play, a toy. I once had a cat (I've owned several over the years) who was an exceptional hunter. Once he brought a dead rat, still warm, and plopped it at my feet, gifting me.

As for my interpretation, a tail swishing back and forth means intensity, especially while stalking.

Did you mean to type swishing rather than switching? The spelling is so familiar...

Personal connection
December 2024 4th was the one year anniversary of putting down my cat. I'm still struggling. She was fascinating in so many ways. My prose would have been at least twice as long.

Final observations
If I had to guess, I'd say this poem was a one-off, written from the heart, light and breezy. There is so much more to a cat than what was expressed here. Had I any doubt, the final, comic line confirmed my supposition. I bet you had fun writing this.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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#4789943

Review of Welcome to My World

for entry "Hello"

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 18+

| (4.5)

Hi Chrys O'Shea. Congratulations on your 12 years of membership.

What prompted me to read this?

I enjoy reviewing for anniversaries because it's a marvelous way to find members previously unknown.

The comments
The topic was a promise to yourself, encouraging you to write more. You fell short, but that's forgivable. We all have goals that don't always come to fruition. That's why I never write any promises to myself. I know that if the accomplishments are written, I'll never follow through. The task discourages, more than motivates.

It's possible I'm reading this sentence incorrectly, but the last part seemed contradictory. If you have a vast amount of ideas, why would you be struggling for something to write?

I always try to have too many things going on because they sound good, then I end up with an unfinished story hunting for something to write.

Personal connection

I have the same problem. My blog is mostly ignored. One reason I like to read blogs is because they're informal and telling. The author doesn't have to worry about getting everything right; it can be written as a flow of thoughts.

Final observations

You're working on writing books, which must consume all of your time. That's the spot where you will shine.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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#4789925

Review of Compassion Drove A Cab Today

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Hi DJ. Venson Congratulations on your 17 years of membership.

The hook
The title intrigued me and the brief description gave me a clue. Two elements that snare a reader from first glance. And the cover art was compelling. It's so striking; I'm happy you included the image at the top of the story. Sometimes, the cover art can't be appreciated in the small thumbnail box.

The comments
I did not like the man in this poem, at all. He sounded old-fashioned, and his complaints were childish. Did he ever consider helping his wife? Disgust was the driving force behind the vehicle of the story. I guess that's my biggest niggle with the poem. It felt out-of-date, with a cliche line or two. Seriously, he's upset because dinner wasn't ready? Sorry, but he's a jerk. If your intention was to bring that emotion on, it worked.

And then along came the taxi driver willing to help such a wretch. I liked the setting of the man standing in the rain because it showed the gloomy scene.

A big round of applause for the taxi cab driver. I wondered how he could see around the man's baseless contempt. Compassion is rarely seen in our world. I'm always shocked when someone is nice to me.

The taxi driver represents man at its best. His words are gentle and cajoling, pointing out all the man in this story could possibly lose.

Final observations
I hope, for his sake, that he remembers the lesson for the rest of his life. And I hope his wife is the forgiving type because this tension felt as if it was an ongoing problem.

I wanted to lower the rating but then realized the unfairness of that. Just because I didn't like the main character, doesn't mean the work should be downgraded.

The last line highlighted the man's change of heart.
To my wife, I'll respectfully say,
Compassion drove a cab today."

Beautiful.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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#4789644

Review of Starman

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Hi Ugly Christmas Sox Congratulations on your 10 years of membership.

The hook
The title brought all sorts of imaginings to mind. The brief description drove me forward to the story.

The comments
Overall, a charming story, enjoyable story. The simple setting ran throughout the story. Setting can be difficult when a w/c restriction is mandated. You did well.

I had to laugh at the romantic conclusion about heaven not being able to contain him.

As to the dialogue, the last sentence read choppy. (bad) at the end of the sentence was awkward and needed no punctuation since his passion is demonstrated in the next sentence.

with a heart starting kiss.
How can this be a heart starting kiss? Was her heart stopped? Just asking.

When I read (lightning) two thoughts came to mind. Death, or The Terminator appearing. In this case, lightning gave way to life. The way she slowly recognized bit by bit would heighten a reader's attention.

Personal connection
As a kid, I wished upon a star, even knowing the act was pure fantasy. I live in a large-ish city where only a few stars are visible. One time. One time only, I saw a shooting star.

Suggestions
Try to choose all three genres available to gain exposure. "Romance" works, but so does fantasy and...I can't think of the third one.

Final observations
My star-streaking wish: Why does the guy in so many stories always have chiseled muscles?

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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14 days may be credited.

#4788919

Review of The Flower of Youth

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Hi LeJenD' Congratulations on your 19 years of membership.

The hook/attack point
If a writer hasn't captured their reader's interest in the beginning, the work is most likely passed over. My interest, unfortunately, was the theme of growing old. I remember when dying at 80 seemed old, now people live into their 100's and beyond. I hope that doesn't happen to me. An aging body is no gift.

And, yes, about my first comment. You did catch me in your weaving of words.

The comments
As I read, it was obvious this poem followed a specific form. I'm sorry to say I can't comment on that. I write poetry, but only the common formats. ABAB or free from.

As the narrator ages, the last line caught me off guard. The (alas) felt out of place. She (?) seemed to be comfortable observing the seasons and relating them to her life, as if she were in acceptance of all to come. That's why 'alas' seemed contradictory. No big deal. Only an observation.

Final observations
So...the flower of youth isn't an overly unique way of showing the aging process. That doesn't mean the poem wasn't an enjoyable read. It's time to return to WdC. Maybe this anniversary review will reach out and tempt you.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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14 days may be credited.

#4788918

Review of My Mother at Ninety

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (5.0)

Hi Cynaemon Congratulations on your 21 years of membership.

The hook
My mom is in her 90s and just transferred over to a care center. I wonder how much longer she has. Anyhow, that's why I chose to read this poem. Now, I'm not so sure it was the best decision.

The comments
Good grief, this was a clever, if tragic piece. The idea of going backwards in time fascinated me. I've never seen that done before. And you did it very well. The conclusion was extremely heartbreaking and disturbing and gave a whole new meaning to the poem.

I lost my sister in 1983 and recreated a life for her in my mind. Recently, when my mom moved to the care center and had to clear out her freaking huge apartment, a few of my sister's creations were there, and I brought them home. Now, I feel even closer to her, but, what would our shared life have been like? Would we still live miles apart? I know we'd still be close.

Final observations
Well, I don't want my personal story to overwhelm the masterpiece you've posted here. It truly was remarkable. I won't say "I'm sorry for your loss," even though I just did. The words have no meaning.

I think I'm happy that you shared this piece. It broke my heart. The work was long ago written, and I hope writing the poem helped you process your pain. It dims but never goes away, does it?

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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14 days may be credited.

#4788916

Review of Tender Touch

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

Rated: E

| (5.0)

Hi B4HEART Congratulations on your 23! years of membership.

The hook
I liked the title and kids, especially newborns. "Crocodile tears" didn't quite work for me, because they mean the tears aren't real born from fears. They are forced and insincere. I don't know of a baby who can fake tears.

Personal connection
Oh, those sleepless nights are exhausting, but holding the child takes away some of the tiredness. I like the way this was written from the newborn's POV.

Final observations

My favourite stanza. I've cried right along with the baby. Great job capturing the essence of a newborn and the mother.

"Hunger, teething, diaper-rash
Enough to make many tears clash"

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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14 days may be credited.

#4788914

Review of The Bracelet Quest

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Hi Ðungeon Щarden Congratulations on your 22 years of membership. You're practically a charter member.

And so it begins

Oh, wow, this is an original story. I smiled all the way through it, because the humour was subtle, which made it all the stronger.

What stood out?

Excellent job developing three strong characters, not counting the bird or dragon, that is. The back and forth dialogue was fantastic. The dragon could be a third character. The description of the ever-darkening forest was also entertaining.

Suggestions

What choice do I have? --- I can think of no other alternative.”
Missing quotation marks at the beginning of this sentence.

"I often awaken at sunrise," (said Mark,) "is that early enough?"
Mark said. This incorrect placement of said before the person's name needs to be adjusted throughout the entire story.

a young woman, dressed in a muddy pink dress, could be seen sitting on the ground/c}
no comma between (dress and (could).

This was meant...
This sentence needs to be dialogue or inner thought.

Final observations

I wonder if the first genre should be comedy? A good laugh is worthy of gold. Nicely done.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

15

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14 days may be credited.

#4788913

Review of Flash Fiction Entries

for entry "Escape"

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: ASR

| (4.5)

Hi An apple a day.... Congratulations on your 16 years of membership.

The Choice
If I had to give a concise and accurate reason for reading this particular piece of FF, I'd have to say it was the title that grabbed my interest. Why? My writings and thoughts are always on the run, escaping from what, I do not know.

The comments
Talk about a surprise conclusion. I had to read this several times before the meaning became clear, due to the misdirection. Excellent approach to this story.
The third paragraph made me feel as if I were the one running, and every descriptive word added to the image theater in my mind.

Personal connection
If possible, I would live in the mountains. That's why I liked the description of boulder placement. I marvel all the time at how that mountain formed and then spewed rocks in puzzling directions. To me, it's eloquent beauty expressed.

Suggestions
If I fell, he might, too.
I wasn't clear on who (he) was.

Final observations
There are many ways to show a person dying. Yours was exceptional.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

16

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14 days may be credited.

#4788589

Review of The Helpers

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Hi Purple Holiday Princess Nixie here, reviewing this item for "I Write in 2024"

It is my joy and honour to review this FF story for you. So many of my memories inundated my mind. Years ago, I hosted Christmas for 20+ family members, some who stayed overnight. I decorated the house, and with so many lights, our electric bill increased to $200. Figures, I did all the work, but at a crucial moment, time to flip the switch, a neighbor passed by and complimented my ex who had done absolutely nothing to help me.

I decorated using candy canes too. They were placed around the fence, facing the street, so people coming around the curve had something to look at. Oh joy, someone stole them.

Suggestions ~ one quibble
I shook my head; from Sam, I'd understand, but Jake should've had the presence of mind to know better.
Suggest using italics for this sentence, or maybe just for the second half.

I was totally immersed in your story, and the conclusion caught me by surprise. You have a broad imagination. Excellent write!

Respectfully reviewed by

~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

17

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14 days may be credited.

#4787458

Review of Enchanted Love

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Greetings, Pennywise. I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

From the top
I surprised myself by choosing this FF story. Even though I sometimes write romance, the genre is not a draw for me, and reading a story about love is something I avoid. However, I read the brief description and took the plunge.

As the plot unrolls
The first sentence or paragraph is the point of attack to draw in the reader. Yours definitely worked that miracle.

FF, by nature is quickly composed, unless, like me, the author overthinks everything and trashes the attempt. Your word choices and command over language stood out, as I read unexpected words. The sight of the woman's appearance was original and provoked an image in my mind. Well done.

Observations
I'm including these remarks, not suggesting editing. Rather the comments may help in another story. That's what happens to me.

So why had this lady-of-the-night affected him so(?)
I don't understand the structure of this sentence. I think your intent was to include the (so) and end it with a question mark.

“Who are you?” He asked.
he asked

“I (to), know of magics..."
(too)

loves kiss resurrected me.
love's kiss

Concluding remarks
The last sentence nailed the overall theme with word choices like betwixt. The narrator hated the 'chuffing' forest. I thought it was hysterical, other than the outcome. In a few words, you presented all the elements of a story.

The notation at the end looks as if Arakun the twisted raccoon wrote this. Next time, use the link to the contest, not the author.

"Daily Flash Fiction Challenge"

The theme itself is common, but I felt vindicated, because 'love' had a disastrous effect. The same has always been true for me.

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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14 days may be credited.

#4787148

Review of Good versus Evil

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (5.0)

Hi WakeUpAndLive~"HoHoHo" Nixie here. I found your work via the read and review option.

Overall Impression
How in the world did you come up with names and descriptions? The demonstration of extreme imagination snagged my interest and held on tightly all the way through the story.

The title works because good cannot exist without evil, the same as light cannot exist without dark. The parricorn was the quintessential good, and the sharkhorse was the quintessential evil. The descriptions of both matched their nature.

The plot plays out
The fight scene was familiar, thereby giving the reader an easy reference point. Sometimes, as in this case, familiarity is needed.

A disturbing and gruesome phrase was graphic.
"bleeding like rain, losing skin like snow."
I can reference the skin to the parricorn, but that leaves me to understand why the sharkhorse bled like rain. Or was the bleeding an overall description because, of course, there would be blood, especially after describing the vicious sharkhorse's teeth.

Lasting impression
I'm also left to wonder why people would pray to both creatures. In my mind, people would pray to the parricorn, hoping for victory, however unlikely that was. Or were they praying to both because they were pleading for the two to stop, another impossibility.

Bravo! for originality, and for showing the concept of good vs. evil in such an unusual way. No point in rating this story less than five stars.

x five.

Reviewing your work was

Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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14 days may be credited.

#4787127

Review of Singing in the rain

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Greetings, Sumojo I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

First thoughts
All of your stories are a pleasure to read, and this one was no exception. I liked everything in this story, but how the painting destroyed the mansion wasn't clear to me. The painting never seemed to have a negative influence. Neither the song nor the subsequent actions (The appearance of Gene Kelly and Debby Reynolds didn't strike me as threatening.) Haunting, yes, but also cool.

As the plot unrolls
The story mirrors the oncoming plot. First, the purchase and then the happenings. I guessed the concurrences from the first few paragraphs. i.e. Neither the house nor the store would be present. This unrolling played out the drama to a maximum. At least the man no longer had the painting. And maybe seeing the dancing would have spooked me as much as the narrator.

Observations
Cyd Charisse danced with Kelly for the musical "Singing in the Rain." Debbie Reynolds was not available. Maybe there was another rendition?

Lasting impression
I wasn't overly emotional when reading the plot. The story was laid out without scaring me. But I did enjoy reading it. Probably, if the story was more haunting, I wouldn't like it. Yes, that's 'contradictory me'—most often of two minds. And I'm weird. I felt sad for the house.

Keep up your talented writing.

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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14 days may be credited.

#4787113

Review of Soup of the Day

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Greetings, winklett I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

From the top
I understand the time constraints of this contest, but, still, I wished for a stronger title for this inventive story.

As the prose unrolls
I was impressed by how many synonyms you chose to describe the different actions. And so many clever ideas for the cook to include in the soup.
snatches a breeze..grabs a pot...folds in time...draft of divinity...and so on.

My mom baked twenty apple pies at once. When I asked her how she could possibly do that, she answered that she thought about how much the family would appreciate her pies, and that she made them all with love. That was grand for me to hear, because in my family, emotions were not allowed expression. Nor was hugging or kissing. I think it was normal, based on that generation. And, I had my aunt who was extremely affectionate. She saved me.

Observations
The transition from the chef's actions to the last paragraph beginning with (I) didn't make much sense. How could she make observations? Consider using something like (A young woman ordered) or any other way to identify the character who was tasting the soup.

Lasting impression
What a joy to read all the details of the soup's creation. Nicely done, with effective and non-repetitive words.

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

21

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4786979

Review of Learn To Trust

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.0)

Hi Veronika. Nixie here. I found your work via the read and review option.

Overall, the lesson to be learned here is a good one. The title and the brief description encouraged me to read the prose.

The one niggle I have is how the void is personified. A void means nothing exists, and it definitely won't whisper. Are you familiar with this quote by Friedrich Nietzsche? "If you look long into an abyss, the abyss looks into you."

Void and abyss are synonyms.

I'm opinionated here. There's no such thing as 'should'. I was taught that by a psychologist several years ago. To accept life as comes, I use these words. "It is what it is." So...what about...Trusting in yourself isn't something you have to earn. But it is something to be learned. Just throwing an idea out there. Take it or leave it.

The first two lines were strong, but they rhymed, which led me to the expectation that this would be a rhyming poem. That didn't happen, so I was thrown off by the inconsistency.

In the title, the word 'to' is not to be capitalized.

I do like the message, because no one goes through life without some sort of trauma. Believing in oneself allows us to recover, which is tantamount to moving on.

I don't use disclaimers, because since I'm writing the review, there's no need for me to say "This is only one opinion." However, you're new to the website, but not necessarily new to writing. I have no intention of discouraging you, so take what I'm offering, without upset. Keep writing!

Reviewing your work was

Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

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14 days may be credited.

#4786956

Review of Thank You, Dear

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Greetings, Bodhisattwa Parekh I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

The choice
After I landed here, curiosity overcame me. The world is a sad place for me, and I've been looking for some light. Also, your name keeps popping up in places I travel, adding to that curiosity.

As the prose unrolls
The theme of one person completing another's life is to be read in multiple places. Though I'm appreciative of the joy expressed here, I can't accept that way of thinking. I believe a person needs to be whole and complete, rather than being codependent. Sorry if I sound like a cynic, but life has taught me a lesson. I'm better off on my own.

The third and fourth lines burst forth on the page, going from black and white to colorful. Not many write in italics. Coupled with the bold font, the piece is almost too much (maybe). I haven't quite made a decision. The centering works well.

Observations
I'm not sure how I feel about the triple use of the word life. Nor am I sure if the word could be replaced with a synonym. That would be something for you to discover.

Lasting impression
Cynicism aside, overall the prose is charming.

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

23

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4786785

Review of April Eighteenth, Nineteen Hundred & Six

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)

Greetings, A Christmas Carol St.Ann I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

From the top

Congrats on the win!

The title informed the reader regarding when this event took place. And then you went one step further.

Character names are essential to any story. The name, Cora Mae Harper, immediately established the fact that this plot was set in the past. However, her enthusiasm cornered me in a predicament. She sounded like a kid. Maybe she was a newlywed.

As the plot unrolls
Oh, so very innocent the story began.
Jess giving Cora the city by looking out the window was both touching and foreshadowing.

The scene was easy to visualize, and the antics of the characters made me think this might be a simple story. How wrong I was. The innocence shifted unexpectedly to an ominous event, and from there the reader had to hang on as details were filled in.

Cora was a compassionate woman who impressed me, jumping to care for others, although her husband was missing. That action is similar to my daughter's actions—always eager to help others. Not to be overlooked, Cora helping the injured was an end to the means. Finding her husband. You really hooked me, and I started to give up hope.

Excellent word choices enhanced the story. The words were correct for the era, and I noticed each one. Nice!

Lasting impression
My eyes were a bit misty when I read the conclusion. You expanded from the personal to the world view, as the couple thought about what the next day would bring.

No wonder this story was a win.

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

24

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4786775

Review of Choose Shoes or the Blues

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: ASR

| (4.5)

Greetings, THANKFUL SONALI Library Class! I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

The Grab
What captured my attention? I liked the title and the way it rhymed, which was also true in the brief description. As my eyes traveled down the page, the format looked great, so here I am.

Stanza by stanza
Sand between the toes. It feels so sensuous, and the first stanza showed that sensation. Afterwards, we have to clean our feet, and that is not an easy feat.

Where I live, walking barefoot in the grass is dangerous. One has to be on the constant lookout for fire ants. They get into your shoes and between your toes. Multiple stings that fester. We also have burrs that pinch.

I'd much rather experience the delightful experience presented in the next stanza.

In the third stanza, maybe substitute (heard) with (thought), because how can the aunt know what her niece is thinking? But then you're stuck with (heard) one after the other. Hmm.

Fourth stanza- here the poem opens up and the reader meets the niece. I fell in love with that charming child.

Fifth stanza- "in every cranny and nook" was my favorite line.

Sixth - Ah! Now the reader knows why the aunt is so upset. I imagined her all dressed for the event.

Here, I will summarize. You penned an excellent conclusion to expand on the niece and show the reader her kindness. We must all be careful of what children hear.

Observations
My one suggestion is to identify who the (she) is in the last stanza.

Parting thoughts
What a joy to read something so fun and bright. Thank you.

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

25

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4786752

Review of Skeletons in the Attic - Chapter One

Review by Mrs. Nixie Clause

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (4.0)

Hi KD Miller Congratulations on your 24! years of membership.

The Choice
I'm asking myself why I chose this story to read. I don't have an answer.

The comments
Long ago, my mom told me that if I didn't have something nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all. But...wow, this chapter was brimming with information and character introductions. I realize this is a book, so I glanced at chapter two and found the same type of writing. Beginning a story with the narrator saying her life is boring is not exactly a draw.

I tried, as best I could to follow along, but I ended up skimming though it, buried in characters talking.

Suggestions
There is no page to turn at the end of this chapter. A link to chapter two would be helpful. I noticed many sentences written with 'and' because someone pointed it out to me. Here is one example.
“Does your story start when you were sixteen?” I asked as I turned to gather my shoes.

Start with the dialogue, but make the second half an action beat. Delete the (I asked) and jump to the action. -- I turned to gather my shoes.

Final observations
I'm not here to hurt your feelings, or disparage your writing, but this style of writing didn't work for me at all. The ironic part is, it's possible the story has been published because you had a book cover pictured.

I'll be on my way now. Happy writing. Don't forget those links to subsequent chapters.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

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A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group"

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .