This Review is just my opinion, you may find advice within and use it as you like or disregard any points within.
What I enjoyed about this piece:
You give a vivid view of life at a reenactment, so good it was making me hungry for some breakfast!
What I think could use some work: (and these are just some grammar issues I found while reading, not being harsh)
Here is something I often find as I read writings done with devices that have spell checker, I call it Words-Spelled-Right-But-Out-Of-Context Syndrome, here is a line from your story: “Could you help find some?” She looks up at me, her pretty chocolate face light brightly by the dancing flames. I believe you want: "lit". This is a common error, found even in popular reading material; magazines, newspapers, even some books where someone was suppose watch for this problem. This just encourages writers to ALWAYS make sure they proofread before posting.
Also, I found a run-on sentence which also includes the spell check problem: It is light enough to see without candles now, and when everything it done cooking we will ring the bell and the people in our group will come and eat, tell us how good the food is, wash their dishes in the tubs of wash water and leave to go do their part in bringing the amazing town of Westville to life.. Can you see the two sentences, (one is lighter, there is the strike through "and"). As you hone your craft of writing you will see some of these rules. There are writings I go back too later and find a lot of rules I learned broken. Also, I highlighted "it", I am sure you see why- "is".
Also, as I was quickly told by several people reviewing my first story, "The Heart Key", make sure you space your paragraphs for readability, you can compare to my story, "Act Your Age, or Leave!" in which I did just that. I tried the 5 space indent traditional paragraphing when I wrote "The Heart Key", and when I posted- IT WAS GONE! And, wow, did I hear it. I haven't gone back to fix it so you can check it out if you want.
OVERALL
The story drew me in. I really liked reading this, my friend.
You are new to writing, keep honing your craft, I can see you will quickly find your voice. Keep on writing, every experience can be told and when you are deep into the craft, every thought, idea, experience, BREATH, can be tweaked into a story worth reading!
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