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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/mlowery99
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15 Public Reviews Given
15 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
This is a good start, and I'm curious to see more.

I would suggest putting in more detail for the setting, characters, and action. A couple paragraphs paired with the dialogue would help. I would also recommend giving some explanation about why Sarah and Edmund think Olive is the Arewed of Evil.

I hope this helps. Keep writing!
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Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This prologue is an interesting one. I like it. I'm reminded of Mass Effect, Star Trek, and other sci-fi series where humanity makes first contact with aliens and has colonies on other planets.

I have a few suggestions for the prologue.

1. Give a brief description of the two alien races' appearances. A few details on how they look so the readers can get a picture in their head. I'm curious if the Xiquin and Trilon look similar to humans or completely different.

2. I would put in a scene or two about members of the Galactic Union finding this Guardian embryo and what happens when they bring the embryo back aboard a space station or something.

3. I would write a scene with a crew aboard a spaceship. The crew would be humans and aliens working together as part of the Galactic Union.

4. Definitely add in details about how dangerous these Guardians are. What makes them so deadly and dangerous?

5. If you want, add in a protagonist that is new to the Galactic Union or is already a member with a few years of experience. Maybe this protagonist can be assigned to various missions.

I hope these suggestions help. I know you wanted feedback.

Keep writing. Happy writing!
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Review of Dance  Open in new Window.
Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
This was very nice. I enjoyed the rhyme scheme and word play.

I don't know why, but it reminds me of William Shakespeare's writing too.

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Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Thank you for this essay. Keep up the good work
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Review of Space  Open in new Window.
Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is beautiful. The way you detail space and humanity's curiosity with outer space and the celestial bodies is great and flow of the poem is wonderful.
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Review of Grace  Open in new Window.
Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Thank your for this poem. Only Jesus can make us whole and holy. It's through Jesus that we can make it back to God and get to Heaven.
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Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Thank you for this! I am a believer in Christ Jesus, and the sermon that I heard today was about the Fruits of the Holy Spirit. The preacher titled her message "Live Out the Fruits of the Spirit." Thank you for this writing. It helps me to remember to trust in God through Christ Jesus and live for Christ.
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Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Excellent poem. I like the flow of this poem from line to line. I felt sad for the flower growing through the crack in the cement and wanting to fly.
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Review of "I Am"  Open in new Window.
Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
That was really awesome. It's been years since I've read a sonnet in high school. But I feel like trying my hand at it again. I like those last two lines. They really stick in your mind.
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Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
That was an enchanting read, and I enjoy reading stories with animals. I used to write short stories with animal characters, but they weren't always well received. Reading this again inspires me to want to write those stories that have meaning.

Anyway, this was great. At the end of the story, there should be quotation marks around that last sentence -"Now, let's go get a saucer of milk."
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Review of The Fall  Open in new Window.
Review by MK Lowery Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
This poem is refreshing. I like it.

Make sure to capitalize Thanksgiving and make line breaks for the last four lines of the poem to help it flow more smoothly.

Keep writing.
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