That was beautiful! Trully amazing! There still were parts I read that seemed to cut the flow but you did well at making up for them in the lines right after. I especally like the beginning and ending being the same. It always seems to push the words in the mind of the reader. Also, you didn't just put it in absent-mindly. You made sure it fit in.
Nice job and keep up the excellent work!
Before I read this, I always thought poems didn't sound right if they didn't rhyme. But now I see from what you have displayed, a whole new way of looking at poems. The grasping of the entire concept of this form of writing is tight within your hands. Keep going and you will amount to great things!
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