It's not enough. We want more of a reason for this wish for sight. What would you/the character do with it? What has it been like not having it and what were the attempts to fix it like?
How delightfully open! It isn't often we readers can be welcomed into the true personality of someone like that and we appreciate it! There needs to be some schtick of sorrow and some drop of joy placed into it to complete.
Yuk, yuk, yuk. The only problem i have with this is that it could cause prejudice and fear against those with mental disabilies. There has to be a way to alleviate that potential. The work was wonderful.
These questions can all be answered by going to the teachings of the Catholic Church, so it is most likely that until time is taken for full, appropriate research, the Pope will not take time to answer either. This is because the answer is not actually being sought. It is his duty to lead Catholics who take the time to read of their faith and go to Catechisms, not non-Catholics. Through pride, good creations (Angel/s) turned against God their creater, thus becoming evil. This evil then out of jealousy led man through his rib away from obedience to God. To protect further separation from good and happiness, God made it harder to obtain the promise of His presence for the generations thereafer but did make it possible.
The layout of wordage is kind to the reader later on in the work, however said reader does not get an idea of who you are if you are defining yourself as a non-Christian despite the fact everyone else is. Do you list yourself then as Agnostic (not interested in finding out or acting on the truth)? Do you list yourself as atheistic (completely unbelieveing in a God, therefore not believing in good or evil)? We need description as to why the questions are asked from the start.
This work was short and pretty after the 2 questions but not yet complete. Perhaps give us a reason why you, out of all the souls in this world, should deserve an answer from the Pope when stating non-Catholicism? Why do you think as you think? Why would you say that God is dynamic? Why would you say that God is physical (perhaps fully explain physical to the reader)? Etc . . . We await the completion of this work, as being capable of using such pretty words and ideas, we know you are capable of so much more.
What a great concept! It needs to be filled out with more as it isn't quite enough. The description is great, so far but we're looking for a fuller plot.
Great title! Good flow, good format, just something else needed. i'd like to feel more when reading the poem, there has to be some sharp, emotion-causing grab added. The objective is good, just not there yet.
Wow! That was incredible!! Great form with structure, great flow, every rule of necessary element was met with this poem (and if it makes you cry, its got to be good)!
This is excellent, just about like a Mini-Saga (which requires the entire story to include 50 words, no-more, no less)!! i'll post one so you can get the idea under "A Dream So Real."
Isn't it funny how the rescues end up being so much sweeter and less of a pain than the store-bought birds? This is a perfect personality profile of both your future Goffin (you are so lucky!) and yours as well, at least in retrospect to the bird.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/marie10k
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.08 seconds at 2:56am on Nov 14, 2024 via server WEBX1.