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Review of Stay  Open in new Window.
Review by Mädchen Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi there,

I enjoyed your poem. There was longing in each stanza, and I thought the emotion really came through.

As far as the writing itself goes, some of the stanzas were more successful than others. My favourite was the fourth stanza (includes the line, more precious to me than an oyster their pearl). I love the way that one flows. There are a few that have some words turned inside out in order to make the rhymes work, and maybe it's just me, but I'm always reminded of Yoda when I hear that sort of line (for example, Each time we talk, more of you I see). Just a personal preference - I might just need to read more poetry and watch less Star Wars. ;)

All in all, I do like this poem. It made me wonder why she or he wouldn't stay (that's not a criticism - I like a poem with some mystery in there).

Deine,
Mädchen
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