Lonewolf's (lonewolfmcq) Reviews

Review Requests: ON

1,214 Public Reviews Given

1,300 Total Reviews Given

Review Style

I'm a straight shooter when it comes to reviewing. If I see something that doesn't look or sound right I'll point it out. I may not pick out every little problem I come across, but I'll definitely let you now about it in the pending review.

I'm good at...

Spotting flow problems within a piece. I am also good at catching misspelled words.

Favorite Genres

Romance/Love, Mystery, Action/Adventure.

Least Favorite Genres

Poetry

Favorite Item Types

Short stories

Least Favorite Item Types

Novella's

I will not review...

Things I feel aren't my taste. I have a lot on my plate already, so my reviewing time is limited.

1

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4783133

Review of Best Flop Ever

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (4.0)

"Quotation Inspiration: Official Contest"
Official Judge's Review

Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
I thought Caitlyn's story was perfect for the contest prompt.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]

The line below stuck with me and took awhile for me to understand and ultimately, I felt you meant to put something else there.

It got worse and she decided to write poems on the event that held her clutched in his arms.

[Suggestions]
Tjernobyl's catastrophe, the biggest nuclear disaster, went down that twilight.

"Here you go. I'm Chris by the way". He placed the coffee mug in front of her. Sipping his beer.

[Ending Thoughts]
I rather enjoyed Caitlyn's story. I felt the story itself was fast paced; with only a few hiccups here and there. I did feel we could use more of the interaction between Caitlyn and Chris to fully flesh out their meeting since it had a significant role in her journey as a writer.

2

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4783130

Review of Unsealed Fate

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

"Quotation Inspiration: Official Contest"
Official Judge's Review

Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
A very entertaining read with great use of the contest prompt.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]

"What?" Nathan felt back in his seat. "You mean you're from an alternate universe?"

[Suggestions]
My only suggestions are to re-read the story to catch any other mistakes I may have missed along with fixing the above line.

[Ending Thoughts]
I enjoyed reading about Nathan's adventure in time and space. I wasn't sure where things were going until that twist I didn't see coming. I think there are many of us who would do the same thing Professor Chen did in his grief. I thought the descriptions of the story helped visualize the scenes well and lead to an easy read. I did find a few instances that could be improved upon and listed one of those above.

3

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4783128

Review of Gates to Success

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (4.0)

"Quotation Inspiration: Official Contest"
Official Judge's Review

Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
A fantastic use of the contest prompt.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
Is there any chance that you might promise not to incinerate me if I came out from behind this rock.

[Suggestions]
Is there any chance that you might promise not to incinerate me if I came out from behind this rock.

Is there any chance that you might promise not to incinerate me if I came out from behind this rock?

[Ending Thoughts]
I liked the character of Germain and attempt to change his fortune. While I did enjoy the story and the flow. I thought it would make for a better read if the reader knew the other failures that led Germain to making the decision to be a Dragon slayer. I feel there is plenty of room for the story to be expanded upon should you choose to do that. I believe it'd be a fun read if it were fleshed out a little more.

4

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4783127

Review of Collecting Resources

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 18+

| (3.0)

"Quotation Inspiration: Official Contest"
Official Judge's Review

Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
A creative approach using the contest prompt.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
Weaking or killing us so you could get control of this planet too.

We figure out what you are doing fairly quickly.

[Suggestions]
She never has taken her eyes off this Image Monitor.

[Ending Thoughts]
I thought your story was an interesting one to say the least. Although, I have to admit, your story lost me a couple of times. I felt like this is quite possibly a part of a larger story and we were only given a piece of it perhaps. It just felt like we were thrown into the middle of something. I did enjoy the creative names you created for this. If I could suggest anything it would be to go back and expand on the beginning to give the reader some insight into how this all came to be.

5

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4783126

Review of Winners and Losers

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

"Quotation Inspiration: Official Contest"
Official Judge's Review

Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
Excellent use of the contest prompt.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
Manhattan, New York

[Suggestions]
The only suggestion would be to fix the mistake I mentioned above. Other than that possibly re-reading the story aloud to catch any other mistakes I might have missed.

[Ending Thoughts]
I thought Joe had an interesting point of view when it came to working in an IT professional environment. This brief glimpse into his life and the interpersonal relationships he had with his ex, not to mention the info about the CEO really made good use of the prompt for the contest. The characters of Joe and later his friend Dave were perfect for this. This gave a weekly serial kind of vibe. Well done!

6

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4709396

Review of Aunty Zero

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
An emotional poem that speaks volumes.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
None that I could find.

[Suggestions]
Nothing could make this better than it already is.

[Ending Thoughts]
I may not know what goes on in your personal life, but this poem you've written hits many points that others could relate to very well. I rather enjoy the creative items you have created and look forward to reading what you create next. Well done!

7

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4709394

Review of Can't Break Free

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
A poem that definitely hits home on more than one point.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
Yes, this life has taken its' toll.

Yes, this life has taken its toll.

[Suggestions]
My only suggestion is to make the change above here.

[Ending Thoughts]
This poem of yours hits many points in my personal life regarding a family member. However, what I must tell you is that it is admirable to give oneself for the sake of family. In the event, that you must rely on those you once helped I could only hope they graciously help without hesitation. It may not mean much coming from me but thank you for all that you've done.

8

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4709393

Review of This is Me

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (5.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
I can relate to much in your poem, well done!

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
None that I could find.

[Suggestions]
No suggestions to make this better than it already is.

[Ending Thoughts]
There was once when I would go to parties and just generally hang out at whatever time of night only to get up for work and then do it again. Yeah, not anymore, lol. The line:

Make excuses for my haste.
Exit while the night’s still young,
For my soft bed and home, I long.

I could see myself doing this just this past weekend.

9

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4709392

Review of What am I?

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (5.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
An interesting poem that can be relatable.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
None that I could find.

[Suggestions]
Nothing comes to mind to make this better than it is.

[Ending Thoughts]
I could relate to some of this as it often seems it is hard to fit in well with family at times especially those not close by. I enjoyed the fantasy comparisons within your poem it helped with a smooth read. Well done!

10

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4709385

Review of Flawed

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
A great poem that definitely meets the contest prompt.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]

I like awake in tears at night
I lie awake in tears at night

[Suggestions]
Just what I pointed out above.

[Ending Thoughts]
I thought this was an excellent poem. I enjoyed the rhyme and smooth flow. I did notice one hiccup, but that doesn't take away from the overall feeling of what you've written. Well done!

11

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4709383

Review of Blame Game

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (5.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
A nice song that fits the contest prompt well.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
None that I could find.

[Suggestions]
No suggestion to make this better than it is.

[Ending Thoughts]
Now, I wasn't quite sure what to expect when I first read this. However, after I couldn't help, but draw comparisons to someone I know very well, lol. Doesn't matter what happens, they are never at fault despite it clearly being their fault. Thank you for sharing.

12

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4709382

Review of Not your problem

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
An interesting poem that seems oddly specific. It has definitely left me curious.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
None that I could find.

[Suggestions]
Nothing to make this better than it is.

[Ending Thoughts]
While I did enjoy the poem as a whole I can't exactly say it was about you or your shortcomings. For me, it reads as if someone you know or are talking about is interfering with a relationship and it's based on their shortcomings.

13

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4702555

Review of How Huey Chose a New Career

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (4.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

MY THOUGHTS
Great attempt at the contest prompt. Huey is an interesting character. And felt Huey, Gene, and the Meddroid played well off each other. While I did enjoy the story as a whole, I felt it didn't quite hit the mark on the contest prompt as his career change didn't seem much different from his previous career with the exception of the physical work.

ERRORS
None that I could find.

SUGGESTIONS
My only suggestion would be to expand on the story if possible. I really enjoyed the glimpse into Huey's world. Well done!

14

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4702554

Review of Stubborn Old Boy

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

MY THOUGHTS
Excellent use of the contest prompt. This story definitely made me smile as I read it. I found the character created for this fit perfectly together with their interactions coming off as very natural. Learning about the mating habits of toads is definitely different, but interesting all the same. Reminds me much of my youth watching PBS.

ERRORS
None that I could find.

SUGGESTIONS
I have no suggestions that could make this better than it already is. Well done!

15

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4702553

Review of A Quiet Little Man

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

MY THOUGHTS
Excellent use of the contest prompt. This is a very heard warming if not sad in many ways tale about a quiet little man making a big difference in people's lives. I enjoyed this very much. Reggie is the perfect character for this story. Reading this reminded me of the quote looks can be deceiving.

ERRORS
None that I could find.

SUGGESTIONS
I have no suggestion that could make this be better than it already is. Well done!

16

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4702551

Review of One hundred metres on slippery ground

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (2.5)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

MY THOUGHTS
Excellent attempt at the contest prompt. While I believe this is a good attempt at the contest prompt I don't believe this quite hits the mark in terms of the prompt itself. I believe this is a great start to a story, but definitely needs more depth to cover the character's new field of study.

ERRORS
None that I could find.

SUGGESTIONS
My only suggestion would be to add more to the story to flesh out what your character is doing and how they came to this new direction in life.

17

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4702549

Review of A Private Professional

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 18+

| (4.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

MY THOUGHTS
An interesting take on the contest prompt. I quite enjoyed the story as a whole. Though, I felt Helona's age needs to be brought up earlier not to mention I believe we need a lot more backstory to explain why she was being targeted by Fhanon. I was left feeling I had missed the reason when I made it to the end having to go back and reread to make sure I didn't. All of that aside it was a smooth read.

ERRORS
None that I could find.

SUGGESTIONS
My only suggestion would be to add some backstory to explain why Helona would be targeted.

18

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4702547

Review of The Snail Analyst

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (2.5)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

MY THOUGHTS
I think it is an interesting approach to the contest prompt. Snail Analyst is a very unusual field of study. While I did enjoy the story I felt it didn't quite hit the mark on what the contest was about. I found myself a tad confused as to why her family would object to her field of study so vehemently. I thought Sniley was a unique character that could use a bit more depth added to her backstory for more clarification.

ERRORS
While reading through the story I came across a few errors. Example:

"In the aquarium, Cyrus told them, bunches of snails were discovered."

"In the aquarium," Cyrus told them, "bunches of snails were discovered."

SUGGESTIONS
My suggestion would be to go back over your story for any errors that you may have missed. Read it out loud to catch anything that doesn't sound right. Perhaps, while you go back over the story you could add more info on Sniley and why her family is against her chosen profession.

19

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4702546

Review of Elemental

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (4.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

MY THOUGHTS
This an interesting attempt at the contest prompt. With that said, I found myself a little confused with the characters' journey. She seemed to live a long life full of disappointment and abandonment only to get an education in the elements. I would have liked to know more about her journey and how learning the language of the elements helps her navigate the paths of life.

ERRORS
None that I could find.

SUGGESTIONS

My suggestion would be to if possible, expand on her journey and describe the world she lives in. I think many would enjoy this. Well done!

20

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4702545

Review of If Music Be the Food of Love

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

MY THOUGHTS
Great response to the contest prompt. I enjoyed this story a lot. Henry and Millie were perfect characters for this tale. It was a slow build-up, but well worth the wait at the end.
I loved Henry and Millie's interactions which came off as relatable and real.

ERRORS
And then admonished the very thought as reaching far beyond the real possibilities.

The above scans better as: She then admonished the very thought as reaching far beyond the real possibilities.

SUGGESTIONS
My only suggestion would be to make the above change. Well done!

21

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4684662

Review of David's Obsession

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
I was very impressed with the way the contest prompt was used.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
None that I could find.

[Character]
David is an incredible character. Some may say he was obsessed, but I took it as a passion for the truth. He had been dealt a bad hand by life and circumstances, so he sought after what he thought was right.

[Suggestions]
None that could make this better than it already is.

[Ending Thoughts]
I really enjoyed this story and David was great. I enjoyed reading about his journey. The story written was incredibly relatable, especially with the hand David had been dealt by life. I wasn't expecting that ending, but it was perfect for this story. Well done!

22

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4684659

Review of Dickie and the Hippo

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
Excellent use of the contest prompt.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
None that I could find.

[Character]
Sheryl and Dickie were great. Both characters played well off one another.

[Suggestions]
None that could make this story better than it is.

[Ending Thoughts]
Well, this certainly was an entertaining story that's for sure. I rather enjoyed reading this as it reminded me well of my brother and me having adventures going to the store for my mom. In your story, though Goliath's character in that lady was rude for no reason and got what she deserved.

23

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4684658

Review of Lightning in the Primordial Soup

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
Very good use of the contest prompt. I was excited and satisfied to see how you would use the prompt and was pleasantly surprised by the ending.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
None that I could find.

[Character]
John Scott was the perfect character for this story. His story was relatable and really inspired one to stand up for what is right.

[Suggestions]
None that could help this be better than what it is.

[Ending Thoughts]
Reading this really had me wishing it was on a tv show. I think it would do really well for an episode of something. John going against the norm to make sure the truth is out there. Not to mention his wife is willing to get down and dirty with him. I thought this was great!

24

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4684656

Review of Mentally and Physically

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 18+

| (4.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

[Overall Impression]
A great sci-fi take on the contest prompt.

[Spelling Errors/Grammar]
When their Watches challenge them, they will use it to kill them too.

When their Watchers challenge them, they will use it to kill them too.

[Character]
Yanica and Thonia were the perfect Goliath and David for this story. Thonia had me with her boldness in the face of the giant Yanica. I couldn't ask for better characters for this.

[Suggestions]
Go back over your story and check for additional grammar corrections.

[Ending Thoughts]
Well, I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. I thought Yanica was created well for this. I wasn't sure what to expect exactly when I started reading this but loved Thonia and the way she took charge. I thought the years of fear and loss really made all of Thonia's people fight for their freedom. This has the potential to be built upon I think. Well done!

25

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14 days may be credited.

#4638471

Review of The Prophet

Review by Lonewolf

Rated: 13+

| (4.0)

Hello, I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest"

. Thanks for entering! It has been a pleasure to read and review your work, please remember any thoughts or suggestions written or implied in my review are based only on my opinion. Thank you for entering and Good Luck!

MY THOUGHTS
This was a great take on the contest prompt. I found myself really pulling for Danny and his bid to express himself to not only the people in his life, but mostly himself. I feel the pastor really helped in his journey of expression and enjoyed the mention of WdC, that was great. The ending was truly shocking and I'll be honest when I say I wasn't expecting that in the least. Still, it was a good read. Thank you for sharing.

ERRORS
None that I could find.

SUGGESTIONS
The only suggestion I have is to possibly bold the handle of the person who gave Danny the review: Danny had brought a printout of his story and the review from someone with the internet name LightTheFire. I thought it might make it read a little better.