Amazing! Great job!Wonderful! You really get the sense the author is with you on this epic journey! A very uplifting poem. Really easy to read. Very good spelling and very good punctuation. This was really inspirational and I can not wait to read more of your poetry!
A good story, indeed, however some corrections couldn't hurt. The story started off with an incomplete sentence. The idea behind the story was actually really good, but the beginning was very choppy however, that could be easily remedied by combining a few sentences.
Wonderful story, but a few corrections couldn't hurt. I liked the story, but the beginning was difficult to read. If you want a beta reader, I'd be happy to help out :). There was a lack of punctuation, which is largely what made the beginning difficult to read.
Loved it! I love how you described the father's friends as well dressed gangsters. Is there going to be a continuation of this? His reaction to his father being gone was very believable. The dialogue was really well done in this story. The descriptions were very in depth.
Between the lines I was laughing. The favorite part for me was about the ants. Lines were amazing, you guys! You all are awesome. Never seen something like this before. Know ya'll made my day. Where did ya'll even get the idea to do this from? Well thanks this was great
Perfectly done outline. Good work. White, green and black being used greatly helped to illustrate points. Boy, I'm probably gonna wind up using this next time I write a novel lol. Can you do multiple genres? Reading this gave me a lot of good ideas as an unorganized writer, thank you so much.
Fallen in love with this story I have. In some ways odd but very interesting. Love the creativity of this. A really creative story. Fallen for the fact I can empathize with the feeling like a freak thing. Novel idea. In retrospect, surprising. Stories like this always surprise me.
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