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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/liliseawater
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Review of Paths  Open in new Window.
Review by Lili Seawater Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Quite an interesting piece!!! I found parts of it difficult to read, however, because of the way your sentences are structured. With a little reworking and a bit of polish, you have the beginings of an intriguing story. It sounds as if you are attempting to run two story lines, then evenually entwine them. Sometimes it can be difficult to do so without confusing the reader. Because I also have been known to do this it was not a problem to me. The scene with Max and the fairy was hilarious. I have never known a fairy to be very cordial either <smile> Write on!!! You have great imagination.
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