Although the contents of your story are disturbing, it is wonderful they are being expressed and to find the words present here! Silence only supports the abuse & perpetuates the imbalance of power. How touching & hopeful that the little girl knew!!! Knowledge is empowering.
I lived through domestic violence and learned that because my childhood experiences were free of violence, I was able to immediately recognize my partner's behavior later on as 'abusive' and as a result, was conscious of the urgent need to leave him. However, not all people are have had violence free childhoods and many can see abuse as normal behavior and don't get the healthy gut reactions to urge them to leave unsafe situations.
It really is sad she returned again and that so many do return. Hopefully one day they will learn they need to leave. I've never read anything from the onlooker's or friend's perspective on this before and found it enlightening to read. I recall being in a domestic violence support group once with a bunch of other women - all having experienced abuse and learning from the Social Worker running it all about the standard issues involved, the typical techniques used, the patterns discovered in many cases and you could have sworn at times all the women in the group were explaining the same man! We all felt frustrated and shamed at the judgements we heard from society about us being stupid to return to these men. We quickly learned that we all had various levels of consciousness about how wrong it was and also had various levels of blindness to our own needs due to past conditioning etc... ie: there are very rational reasons for women to return and information - (for me from a Social Worker who specialized in domestic violence) helped me find the path out - as with many, friends and family are ignored as being biased and a lot of brain washing has often gone on to cast doubts over their intentions.
Great writing, thanks for sharing!
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