Such a cool, thought captivating poem. I like that you don't classify these moments as positive or negative, because it gives the reader their own emotional choice which can range from their mind's own spectrum. you poem is nicely executed and the short length gives time to reflect on the meaning.
I enjoyed this poem. You did an awesome job. It's length makes it a comfortable read and I like how it vibes "Get over it" in a subtle, kinder way at the end. I also found it cool how each couplet begins with the same word. It was a nice, meaningful read.
Personally, I've lived in a desert most of my life and I absolutely hated it. Though I can't exactly relate on sensory levels, I enjoyed the imagery given from the setting and wish even more to experience the joys of snow that you have. This is a great poem that flows of the tongue beautifully.
Such an awesome poem. A secret: (Marius is a favorite of mine :D) You must mean Armand when you speak of this infatuated boy, yes? Either way, the structure of this poem is well done and the phrases are powerful. It gives the same vibe you'd expect from Anne Rice.
Is this his metaphorical Hell he gets through? I can relate to the feeling of "going through Hell and back." It's a tough start when recuperating from such a miserable state of mind but the new beginning is promising with all the life lessons learned.
Also I love the imagery of: a burnt skin he's in. You can imagine what I saw x)
Though I can't say I've felt everything you've wrote, I've felt a lot of it. When life whirls around you and you can't hold fast to much of it, you lose sight of what should exactly matter and how much it should matter. But when people start basing it on the general public's acceptance of normality and you don't meet their standards, that's usually when it begins to bother you. What I believe is that it is all categorized as human urges simply because YOU are human.
I feel the same when nature enfolds me. It disconnects you from the continuous hustle of civilization and gives a simplistic primitive serenity that has been and always will be a part of this world no matter what humanity is doing.
I also find the structured shape of your poem pleasant :)
I love the verse: Masculinity aside, tears flow from his eyes
Emotions shouldn't be categorized into gender roles and when men particularly feel vulnerable from them, it seems to me that that in itself is the true weakness. Portraying apathy may give people a sense of superiority in control but it's obviously not the healthiest when such pains evoke these emotions.
This is a beautiful and completely heart felt poem.
Very touching and sad because there's a truth in becoming who your parents were. It's not always the fact that they're bad people, but that they've come to realize a miserable existence and cannot yield to it. This is what Ted shows me when he sees he's become his old man.
A little friendly advice: A few lines are a bit longer than the rest in stanzas and I think cutting out or combining some of the smaller words would help the flow :)
Aww, I loved this story. It's true that someones mental instability affects those around them and it's not something you can exactly turn away from when you're family. I wish there was more of a conclusion for Scott but overall a very moving piece.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.12 seconds at 7:09am on Dec 31, 2024 via server WEBX2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My review has been submitted for consideration in "