You did an admirable job of venting your feelings for your ex. i appreciate that you attempted to rhyme this piece.
i rhink you hav a start of something.
keep working on it.
interesting story. It was a bit difficult to get into in the beginning, but you did an excellent job of building tension with those run-on sentences.
Those sentences were bothersome, but necessary to build tension. i loved the way you popped the tension with the simple, "I'm sorry i died protecting you."
Definitely, you must keep writing. oh, and watch the fw misspelled words.
Excellent picture of the changing stages of motherhood. Not only are you a good writer, but i sense you are an "in the moment" mother. Keep loving those children and keep writing.
I loved this simple allegory on the the choices in life.
one picky point: in all fairy tales, the princes and princesses have names. Your characters would be easier for the reader to differentiate if they had names.
Keepwritign. i'd lvoe to read more of your work.
Now i'm afraid to look in my bathroom mirror. Good job. Even though i guessed what the mirror would reflect, you did an amirable job of building tension and , thereby, terror. Keep writing. You're definitely on the right trace.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.08 seconds at 7:28pm on Nov 23, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My review has been submitted for consideration in "