I like this prologue very much. makes want to read the story. I could see him talking to himself. Over all it felt like he was not going to stand by while his kingdom was destroyed.
My favorite line: ...war is lurking again.
My only thing is I can't make out who Davros Serpenthelm is? I did read it a few times and I'm still not getting it .
I would love to read the first chapter if ya got one.
Hi there, First I must say I really really enjoyed your story. At moments laughed until my side hurt. This is my favorite line...I see relief. When I come out, so does the smell, "That's fiber for you," I absent mindedly say.
Just so you know my spell check says that the word "mindedly" is wrong. Its doesn't give anything to replace it, just thought I'd let ya know and also this... you for got the "s" in just.
I shake my head to clear it of this nonconstructive rubbish. The trees making up the thicket are not my worst problem. Large clumps of grass * jut* out of brackish water.
Is this story morally wrong? Yes or No?= I don't know if I'd say "morally" I don't really get where that plays. But I would say maybe Ironic. Please help me understand what are meaning. thanks and I really like the way you write.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/jmellissa305
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.10 seconds at 3:39am on Dec 18, 2024 via server WEBX2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
