No, but in all seriousness... You had my attention from "Let me tell you about my last victim…" That in itself is just an attention grabber. I read slowly at first but felt myself speed-reading as I wanted to know what happened. Big surprise twist at the end. I loved this story. Keep some like this coming. :)
I found this very entertaining, though I really wish it was longer. Longer would have been much better for this story as I was hooked from the very first line. I read and read and laughed at the last one. You're a good writer so keep on writing. Thanks for the good share.
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