It was very insprational. And I tell ya I never saw it comin 'til I got to the end. The whole time I was thinking my family does that to me, too. So I'm sure people can relate.
But you may want to use grammer and puntuation better. It dosnt feel like a story as much as it does a paragraph. But I feel they're is much potential.
Keep up the good work!!
JeSea
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