Great story. More detail at the end would have been preferred thought. I wanted to know how Rancor knew Meghan was coming that night. And why she suddenly disappeared. Also why the king the king was going to the servant's quarters.
Everything else was just as a fairy tale should be.
Well, written. You did a great job of immediately grabbing the readers attention and keeping it. I wish it were longer as it seems more a prelude to bigger and better things than a story in and of itself. Other than that the only thing that I'd look at is the names. Any name that is difficult to pronounce or you have to stumble through it everytime you do pronounce it, even in your head, like Avdonina draws focus away from the story and onto getting that name said correctly. Nick names are great in these cases, when the name is more than a mouthful. Or, if the name really is a piece of cake to get through and people like me are just pronouncing it incorrectly then having it spelled phonetically would be beneficial.
Anyway, the fact that all I found to constructively criticize was a name says that the story was fabu.
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