*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/j.fisherman
Review Requests: OFF
9 Public Reviews Given
14 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Fisherman
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Grammar is a bit of a problem but...I love it! The pace was fairly good, not too fast and not too slow. The characters are done really well, Keep on writing!
2
2
Review by Fisherman
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
That's a good good story! A couple hints: I would use double quotes when someone's speaking, and in some places(like opening the fight scene) slow it down a little. Also, use paragraphs a bit more, it can add emphasis. In spite of these issues, I love this story to pieces! Keep on writing!
3
3
Review of Twilight Shadows  
Review by Fisherman
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hey Spencer,

this one looks good. It seems a little rushed, so you might want to go back and slow it down just a little. The other thing is formatting. Especially on this website, you will probably want to put line breaks between paragraphs and indent paragraphs. I think it would also help if you would explain just a little bit more about what's going on. Unless, of course, you are going to keep us in suspense or something like that.

hurry and post your other book!

Fisherman
4
4
Review by Fisherman
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
hmmmm. that's kinda interesting. there are good short stories and bad ones, and I think you have something here. i would personally like it better as part of a larger story, but my preferences put aside, you did very well.
There's just one thing I would like to comment on:
the last part of the story I found a little difficult to follow. You might want to detail a little more there.

I'll be back for more!
4 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 1 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/j.fisherman