Love this! You should continue this story. It leaves the reader at a cliff hanger. Have you thought about continuing this story? You did a fantastic job! Keep writing! I hope this review helped!
I like that you have poetry contest open to everyone and the style can be anyway they want. Some people probably don't know what kind of style their poetry writing is. I don't. In rule 8 I saw a grammar mistake. Also this sentence, "This rule is in the rules below as has always been one of the rules" does not make any sense. I think what you are trying to say is, This rule is listed below and this rule has always and will always be a rule. You might want to fix that. One more thing is I personally think you should change some of the sentence back into black. To me it's just to much. Other than that I think you did a great job! Keep writing! I hope this review helped!
In the auction Precious Gifts I offered to give the winner 5 reviews, 2 reviews of a friend, and 1review of an newbie. He picked you. So here is my review on your story Time Runs Out.
I am a little confused. Why did she have to kill her brother. This is a good ending to a story but I think you should add on to beginning. Let the readers understand why she killed. Why there had to be damage control and why is had to be at midnight. Why is he considered a monster. You have a good plot line but I think you to add to this story. Overall I think you did a good job. Keep writing. I hope this review helps.
I love this story so much! It is fantastic! I can't wait to read chapter 2. It is so entertaining. But I did notice a grammar mistake. Not a big problem. I can't seem to find it again. You might want to re read your story to find it. Overall I think you did a fantastic job!
I loved your short story. Even thought it was so sort it was perfect! The only thing is the story rushed through the part when the breath of life swept through her. Maybe just add another sentence or two. Other than that don't change single word in your story! Overall I think you did a fantastic job!!!
Your poem is vary interesting. You did a really good job for doing it in about 5 minutes! The only thing is, the first two lines of the last paragraph is a little confusing. They don't really go together. You might want to add a line in between them so it makes a little more sense. My favorite part of the poem was,
"Escaped my newly constructed being,
hopped that train to go sight seeing.
I saw the great plains and mountains tall,
Life's constrictions I avoided them all.
I left my wife for reasons still unknown,
and the open road became my home."
The poem really captured my attention. But one question that was un answered was, what was his evil machine? Other than that I loved the poem. And usually I don't like poems. I saw not grammar or spelling mistakes. I think you did and excellent job!
In the beginning the story grabbed my attention. But as I kept reading I became not as instead in it. You have a good plot line, but I think you need to work on keeping the story interesting. Also I got confused in the beginning. Is the main character a boy or girl? Also why did they sleep in cells? I saw no grammar or spelling mistakes. If you just add more back round to the story and more details to answer some of the readers questions, it would turn into a fantastic story. Overall I think you did a great job!
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