*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/indiana
Review Requests: OFF
37 Public Reviews Given
249 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Depressed Hamster  
Review by indiana
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
My favorite part:I'm running in my hamster wheel,
Plastic. Shiny. Red.
I'm running in my hamster wheel,
I wish that I were dead




My suggestions: Even out the rhymes a little more




Grammar and Punctuation: Not really sure about the grammar/puct when it comes to poems




My overall impression: I thought this was very funny, how true that we bury are small pets in the back yard..lol...I enjoyed it
2
2
Review by indiana
Rated: E | (5.0)
This little story was great. How one one little gesture can make up for Valentine's days past. Your son is a very special young man and your very lucky to have him in your life. I shall read more of your work. They keep me interested the whole way. Of course no spelling or grammar issues. Well Done!
3
3
Review by indiana
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Wow this was really good. At first a just thought this girl was just paranoid, but from the ending, I can clearly see this was a downward spiral from deep depression. I guess no one really knows what causes it when seemingly nothing is wrong, but you had a brilliant way of conveying the message. Very Good Job!
4
4
Review of Why I Write  
Review by indiana
Rated: E | (5.0)
Drama productions huh? Ya know i was in my h.s play. But enough about me. I enjoyed your little piece of self expression and how writing gives you the same excitement your son gives you when you see him after a period of time. I only found 1 error: wreck havoc on my nerves/ I think you meant wreak..hey but I could be wrong, your the teacher afterall. Nice Job!
5
5
Review of Hit Man  
Review by indiana
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Let me tell ya something. I got so into these last two stories but was disappointed at the end. Are they chapters to a bigger story? I was actually expecting someone other then his partner, that was trying to kill him. Ver well written however excepy for this one sentence I didnt understand: The doctor shook his head. “Nasty wound that./ other then that nice job!
6
6
Review of ShapeShifters  
Review by indiana
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Pretty good story. Written very well with no grammar or puctuation issues. I wish you would have given us more at the end. I would have liked some finality to the story. You didnt say if the shapeshifter ever killed a human. Thats why im interested to know how they would know to calm themselves when attacked. Overall, kept me interested, just wanted more. Nice job!
7
7
Review by indiana
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Poor Jose, if only he were thinner..lol. Very good story. Believe it or not, I actually saw a a news show that had a man dangling just like your story does. Fortunatley he survived. Nice flow, kept me interested all the way. No grammar or puctuation issues that I saw, nice job!
8
8
Review of Birthday Surprise  
Review by indiana
Rated: E | (4.0)
See, sometimes your prayers do get answered! I only detected one puncuation problem: mothers house- should have an apastrophe. Nice little tale, i got a chuckle out of it..nice job!
9
9
Review of Missing you  
Review by indiana
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Very well done for a contest entry. I guess he comitted homocide/ suicide. As with all your stories. No grammar or puncuation issues I could detect. I like your stories, keeps me guessing til the end. Nice Job!
10
10
Review of Wicked Thoughts  
Review by indiana
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
A few funny lines in there that I chuckled out loud at. I dont know to much computer mumbo jumbo, so it wouldnt be fair to judge this other then it was a nice short story which garnered some laughs. Nice Job!
11
11
Review of Alison's Find  
Review by indiana
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Bravo! I was completely fooled by this story and I like it like that! I found absolutley nothing wrong with this story. Tell Alison thanks for getting the World annihilated, foolish little girl and her nosy antics. Loved it!
11 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 1 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/indiana