I really enjoyed your argument, fantastic appraoch; well backed up, and straight to the point. It is beautiful how you take the reader down, a never ending fantasy world of hidden golden nuggets. You have one over on me. I myself, feel an amatuer(18 months) in the face of your writing. With your philosophy in mind I ask, 'Please could you lend me some G. P's, so I can gain some lend, and definition to devoting a web-site in your favour.' I will now study your work, moreover, and knock on all my neighbours doors to tell them the new messiah has arrived. All hail sparticus!
Right on Brother! Holy Christ that's a heart wrencher; a kicker of a story. Excellent build up of tension, but for me the ending gives up on its-self a little. Beautiful description. Many thanks, and good luck!
A friend once said to me 'the world does'nt revolve around you.' My answers was 'I'll have to do something about that.' The wall has been constructed with a hidden door...and my happiness in it-self is now tolerable.
Your story has and will strike many cords....thank you.
Excellent, bravo, well done, three cheers, come - lets give a hip, hip, hooray, and move toward the 250 characters to pot the 600 Gp's. The distintion and intrigue in the chracters dailogue was a high point throughout. You hold your voives well-done.
Yeah...it got me all the way down...nice emotion, very heart-felt...the last line falls a bit flat for me...I would maybe, maybe jumble the words around, maybe (just to see how they sound): 'How I wish I could wish again:' How I live I could wish again:' How I wish, I could wish to live.'
Nice and surreal: the mind wonders through beautifully...good imagery. The narration sticks at the start and ending of some paragraph's:
and faced again their drinks.
The newcomer nodded, and walked slowly to an empty table in the corner of the taproom. He sat and placed his heavy walking stick against the wall behind him, within easy reach.
The inn keeper grabbed a serving girl that was re-entering the back room by the arm, “Go take his order.” he ordered her gruffly, motioning with his head towards the newcomer.
The serving girl looked to where he had motioned. Her eyes widened and she turned sharply to glare at him.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.10 seconds at 5:41am on Nov 24, 2024 via server WEBX2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
