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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/heatherlee
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2 Public Reviews Given
10 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review by HeatherLee Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Okay, now that I have read the second part to this story, I do have a few comments. I realize that Bella doesnt have much of a choice, but I really think she is handling this too well. We dont know that he can fly until he flies her BACK. If someone had just kidnapped me and then FLEW me to a pay phone, I'm not too sure I would be okay with that. I think that you need to add a scene that shows her flipping out about that because normal people would. I also think that Icarus needs to explain more to Bella. He seems like hes taking her ease for granted and she seems like she is alright with all of this. All in all I really like your style of writing and you do it well. The story kept me interested and wanting more. Which by the way I DO. sorry if this review seemed harsh, I didnt mean for it to come out like that. Good luck and I cant wait for future chapters!
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Review by HeatherLee Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I like what you have here so far. I feel like I know Bella pretty well already which is really good considering it was only one chapter. I also still kind of like Icarus-even though he kidnapped her. I look forward to reading more of this story in the future.
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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/heatherlee