Wow. Very powerful indeed. No one should ever go through that and I believe there is a special circle of hell for sick monsters like that. Thank you for sharing. As a survivor of sexual abuse myself, I know it is difficult to speak up. Just know it was not your fault, you are beautiful, brave and loved. If you ever need a kind ear I am here for you. I would like to share a poem I wrote the other day. I apologize I can't link it because my portfolio is full but I hope this helps. God bless and keep writing.
Pieces on the Floor
My heart beats violently inside of my chest,
pounding so hard I feel it might burst.
Fear and anxiety so deep within me,
not sure what will kill me first.
The way you put your hands on me
made me want to crawl out of my skin.
Fury and grief consume my soul
as I see how you look at me and grin.
Shadows creep out of the corner of my eye
and it makes me stop and cringe.
The mere thought that you might be waiting for me
causes a debilitating twinge.
Does it make you feel like more of a man
to prey upon little girls?
Do you get drunk on the power you start to feel
as you force their hands to unfurl?
I never wanted to do those things
but you said if I didn’t I would be scorned and hurt.
So out of fear I gave into your demands,
silently weeping as I took of my skirt.
Trembling in fear on the cold hard floor,
I didn’t know what to do.
You savagely stole my innocence.
I didn’t have the courage to stop you.
After weeks of torture I finally spoke up,
but it didn’t work out and you are still free.
“There’s not enough proof so just move on,”
they said instead of protecting me.
So what can I do but pick up the pieces
of what little remains of my heart?
The truth of what happened matters little now
as justice for your cruelty from me did depart.
Then years later I come to find out
that you hurt another precious little child.
Now how do I live with the guilt and shame?
I feel as responsible as the man I reviled.
If only I’d been more convincing you see
or fought harder to stop you back then,
she wouldn’t be tattered beyond recognition
and you wouldn’t have the chance to destroy again.
So what are my options now?
I feel so terrified and horribly weak.
To stand up for those in terror now-
I must continue to speak.
It’s a daily struggle to keep fear at bay
and remember I am not alone-
and that letting go of my bitterness
doesn’t mean your actions I condone.
Secrets remain so devastating
and evil continues to grow in the dark.
So I’ll keep shedding light ‘til all that remains
is hope and peace in this world so cold and stark.
Thank you so much for sharing. It takes a lot of strength and bravery to speak up about such horrible acts. As a survivor of sexual abuse myself, let me just say you are not alone, you are beautiful and it was not your fault. I have experienced the same emotions described in your poem. That being said, if you ever want a kind ear, I am here for you and will gladly listen and help if I can. I would like to share a poem I wrote the other day. I can't link it because my portfolio is full but I hope this helps. Keep writing and God bless!
Pieces on the Floor
My heart beats violently inside of my chest,
pounding so hard I feel it might burst.
Fear and anxiety so deep within me,
not sure what will kill me first.
The way you put your hands on me
made me want to crawl out of my skin.
Fury and grief consume my soul
as I see how you look at me and grin.
Shadows creep out of the corner of my eye
and it makes me stop and cringe.
The mere thought that you might be waiting for me
causes a debilitating twinge.
Does it make you feel like more of a man
to prey upon little girls?
Do you get drunk on the power you start to feel
as you force their hands to unfurl?
I never wanted to do those things
but you said if I didn’t I would be scorned and hurt.
So out of fear I gave into your demands,
silently weeping as I took of my skirt.
Trembling in fear on the cold hard floor,
I didn’t know what to do.
You savagely stole my innocence.
I didn’t have the courage to stop you.
After weeks of torture I finally spoke up,
but it didn’t work out and you are still free.
“There’s not enough proof so just move on,”
they said instead of protecting me.
So what can I do but pick up the pieces
of what little remains of my heart?
The truth of what happened matters little now
as justice for your cruelty from me did depart.
Then years later I come to find out
that you hurt another precious little child.
Now how do I live with the guilt and shame?
I feel as responsible as the man I reviled.
If only I’d been more convincing you see
or fought harder to stop you back then,
she wouldn’t be tattered beyond recognition
and you wouldn’t have the chance to destroy again.
So what are my options now?
I feel so terrified and horribly weak.
To stand up for those in terror now-
I must continue to speak.
It’s a daily struggle to keep fear at bay
and remember I am not alone-
and that letting go of my bitterness
doesn’t mean your actions I condone.
Secrets remain so devastating
and evil continues to grow in the dark.
So I’ll keep shedding light ‘til all that remains
is hope and peace in this world so cold and stark.
Very powerful. Thank you for sharing. I am so sorry you had to go through that. Please know that you are very brave and you are not alone. I myself am a survivor of sexual abuse and know exactly the sentiments expressed in your poem. I am here for you if you ever want to talk. Don't be afraid to stand up and speak the truth, though difficult as it is. I was threatened and physically hurt for speaking up so I was never allowed to talk about it or begin to heal until I met my husband. I will gladly share your burdens if it means you know the truth that you are beautiful, it was not your fault, you are loved, and someday he will pay for what he did. I would like to share a poem I wrote the other day. I can't link it because my portfolio is full but I hope this helps. God bless and keep writing.
Pieces on the Floor
My heart beats violently inside of my chest,
pounding so hard I feel it might burst.
Fear and anxiety so deep within me,
not sure what will kill me first.
The way you put your hands on me
made me want to crawl out of my skin.
Fury and grief consume my soul
as I see how you look at me and grin.
Shadows creep out of the corner of my eye
and it makes me stop and cringe.
The mere thought that you might be waiting for me
causes a debilitating twinge.
Does it make you feel like more of a man
to prey upon little girls?
Do you get drunk on the power you start to feel
as you force their hands to unfurl?
I never wanted to do those things
but you said if I didn’t I would be scorned and hurt.
So out of fear I gave into your demands,
silently weeping as I took of my skirt.
Trembling in fear on the cold hard floor,
I didn’t know what to do.
You savagely stole my innocence.
I didn’t have the courage to stop you.
After weeks of torture I finally spoke up,
but it didn’t work out and you are still free.
“There’s not enough proof so just move on,”
they said instead of protecting me.
So what can I do but pick up the pieces
of what little remains of my heart?
The truth of what happened matters little now
as justice for your cruelty from me did depart.
Then years later I come to find out
that you hurt another precious little child.
Now how do I live with the guilt and shame?
I feel as responsible as the man I reviled.
If only I’d been more convincing you see
or fought harder to stop you back then,
she wouldn’t be tattered beyond recognition
and you wouldn’t have the chance to destroy again.
So what are my options now?
I feel so terrified and horribly weak.
To stand up for those in terror now-
I must continue to speak.
It’s a daily struggle to keep fear at bay
and remember I am not alone-
and that letting go of my bitterness
doesn’t mean your actions I condone.
Secrets remain so devastating
and evil continues to grow in the dark.
So I’ll keep shedding light ‘til all that remains
is hope and peace in this world so cold and stark.
Wow. Very powerful indeed. Thank you for sharing. I am a survivor of sexual abuse and I can't begin to tell you how many times I tried to speak up and I was shut down/threatened. It's only as an adult I can speak the truth and begin to find healing and hope. I struggle daily with fear, anxiety, guilt and shame but am grateful that I have my poetry to help get it out of my system and share truth and hope with other people who have been through similar struggles. God bless you and keep writing.
Thank you for sharing. I know how difficult it is. I too am a survivor of sexual abuse. I was never allowed to discuss it as a child. I believed so many lies that it was my fault, it was my sin that allowed it to happen, I was dirty, I was unloveable, unwanted and horrible. I almost took my own life when I was 13. It was only by hearing the truth that I was able to stop and begin to turn my pain and shame into something positive by writing poetry. I share with others because it's important to help heal other people and let them know that they are not alone. I wrote a poem today describing what I went through and I would like to share. I only have a free account so I can't give a link. I will just put directly in this post. But thank you so much and know that you are brave and loved. If you want to talk, I am here. God bless.
Pieces on the Floor
My heart beats violently inside of my chest,
pounding so hard I feel it might burst.
Fear and anxiety so deep within me,
not sure what will kill me first.
The way you put your hands on me
made me want to crawl out of my skin.
Fury and grief consume my soul
as I see how you look at me and grin.
Shadows creep out of the corner of my eye
and it makes me stop and cringe.
The mere thought that you might be waiting for me
causes a debilitating twinge.
Does it make you feel like more of a man
to prey upon little girls?
Do you get drunk on the power you start to feel
as you force their hands to unfurl?
I never wanted to do those things
but you said if I didn’t I would be scorned and hurt.
So out of fear I gave into your demands,
silently weeping as I took of my skirt.
Trembling in fear on the cold hard floor,
I didn’t know what to do.
You savagely stole my innocence.
I didn’t have the courage to stop you.
After weeks of torture I finally spoke up,
but it didn’t work out and you are still free.
“There’s not enough proof so just move on,”
they said instead of protecting me.
So what can I do but pick up the pieces
of what little remains of my heart?
The truth of what happened matters little now
as justice for your cruelty from me did depart.
Then years later I come to find out
that you hurt another precious little child.
Now how do I live with the guilt and shame?
I feel as responsible as the man I reviled.
If only I’d been more convincing you see
or fought harder to stop you back then,
she wouldn’t be tattered beyond recognition
and you wouldn’t have the chance to destroy again.
So what are my options now?
I feel so terrified and horribly weak.
To stand up for those in terror now-
I must continue to speak.
It’s a daily struggle to keep fear at bay
and remember I am not alone-
and that letting go of my bitterness
doesn’t mean your actions I condone.
Secrets remain so devastating
and evil continues to grow in the dark.
So I’ll keep shedding light ‘til all that remains
is hope and peace in this world so cold and stark.
Thank you for sharing my friend. You are right...fear is one of the hardest, most crippling emotions to deal with. I was sexually abused as a child and was never allowed to talk about and was threatened when I tried. It wasn't until I was an adult that I finally opened up (to my husband ironically) about what happened. I still struggle with triggers and fear and anxiety every day but it helps knowing I am not alone. I write poetry to keep myself sane and also help others through their pain. (and no, I did not intentionally make that rhyme lol)
Thank you for sharing and please don't be afraid to reach out to me. I am a great listener if you just want a kind ear or some advice. Blessings to you. Keep writing.
Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed the read and it sends a message of encouragement that we are not alone. Something we ALL need in our darkest hour. As a victim of several types of abuse and never being allowed to share or talk about it until I was an adult, I believe EVERYONE should know they are not alone and have a voice. So thank you again. The only thing I found mildly distracting was the occasional break of rhyme in stanzas 3, 8 and 11. But overall, wonderful job.
Hi! I believe this was well written and reminded me of various periods in my life when I experienced severe trauma but had to wear a mask and pretend everything was ok. It also reminded me of my grandmother who had ALS. After my grandfather passed away from cancer, she was very lonely and wanted only to be with her husband. But somehow she held on for another year, all the while having a smile on her face and trying to find the joy in the little things. It is a deep message. I found nothing distracting and enjoyed the read. Out of curiousity, did you write this poem from personal experience or something else? Many blessings friend and keep writing.
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