I'm here to give your "A Day In My Life " , a Simply Positive review. This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impressions
Writing a story about a regular day may seem boring to some, but not to others.
Grammar & Construction
There are several missing commas. Actually, some of the sentences just flowed in from one to the next, as if it's rushed.
Bord should be bored.
The parenthsis got in the way.
A bit more detail about some of the things in your story may also help.
Thanks for sharing!
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I'm here to give your "Least Favorite" , a Simply Positive Newbie review. This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impressions
This is a sad poem, told from the point of view of one who feels unnoticed and abandoned.
Flow & Style
nice flow.
Suggested Improvements
line five, wake me perhaps?
Third line, parents?
Sixth line, but should be by.
Seventh line, parents'
Thanks for sharing!
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I'm here to give your "Me and My shadow" , a Simply Positive Newbie review. This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impressions
This is a beautiful poem. I can certainly empathise with the girl.
Flow & Style
Nice, short lines, that are concise. I think that the poem would be better if you used more punctuation.
Suggested Improvements
First line, its should be it's.
Seventh line, should be she's. Same with the sixth line of the second stanza and in the third stanza. Actually, you don't have apostrophes where appropriate at all.
knowone should be no one.
Thanks for sharing!
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I'm here to give your "Looking Back - Day One" , a Simply Positive review. This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impressions
As the beginning of a much larger story, this first part really captured my attention. That it is also under experience (so I'm assuming this is real) makes the admission even more startling. I think it's the openness that makes my eyes go wide and ask myself "This is true?"
It's does provoke emotion, and as a parent myself, I sometimes wonder if my own children can be like this.
Grammar & Construction
Everything looks to be in order
Suggested Improvements
None at all.
This is an increadibly open story. Thanks for sharing!
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Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Robert Frost Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honor!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
This is an excellent poem about childhood friends, how life sends them on different paths, and wishing for those days again. I think this is a poem many people can relate to.
Flow & Style
In the second line of the first stanza, I think the word "all" hinders the flow of the poem. I think it would be much more smooth without it.
Having the last two lines of the second stanza not rhyme kept it at odds with the rest of the poem, where the lines did rhyme.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Robert Frost Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honor!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
I read this poem several times, trying to make sense of it all. I think it was the mention of the River Styx in the first stanza that threw me off. It seems the first three stanzas are referring to trick-or-treaters, so why not 'swarm the streets' instead?
Flow & Style
The poem is rich with alliteration, as the contest (if I recall correctly) calls for, though I think it weakens towards the end.
I'm here to give your "Circle of Life" , a Simply Positive review. This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impressions
This is a touching poem in memory of the author's late mother.
Flow & Style
The rhythm of the poem was smooth and the lines flowed well. The rhymes sounded unforced.
Suggested Improvements
I don't think it's necessary to capitalise the first word of every line. The capitalisation of your poem is inconsistant.
Thanks for sharing!
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** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** The intent of this One Pair Review is to focus on descriptions and imagery of a poem.
Descriptions:
Excellent word usage to describe a baby. What is it that they see? What are their thoughts? What lies beneath cherubic faces? It's especially brought out in the third stanza.
Imagery:
It's easy to imagine the searching eyes of a baby, wondering what they're thinking as your eyes meet theirs.
Overall Impression:
Beautiful poem, in both form and words. As a mother, it makes me think of my own children, when they were babies themselves.
Thanks for sharing!
--Wyn
This piece was reviewed on behalf of: "Invalid Item"
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** The purpose of this Flush Review is to go over things in your poem like word usage, structure, added imagery, formatting and emotions or feelings of the piece.
Word Usage:
I like the words used to describe an anxiety attack. The one part that made me stop for a moment was "episode-bearing crisis leaves..." I suppose an attack can be called an episode as well, but I don't think it's the attack that causes the crisis (though feeling like one's having a heart attack can probably be cause for concern). Rather, I think it's the crisis that causes the anxiety.
Structure:
The poem was a perfect acrostic.
Imagery:
The poem shows the effects an anxiety attack can have on some people. Even after a check-up says everything's okay, the person is still shaken, knowing one can happen again any time.
Emotions/Feelings:
Being the sufferer of such attacks as well, this is a poem I can relate to. When we're told that it's all in the mind and there's nothing wrong physically, it's still not much comfort.
Overall Impression:
This short poem gives a nice insight to someone with anxiety.
Thanks for sharing!
--Wyn
This piece was reviewed on behalf of: "Invalid Item"
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Hemingway Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honor!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
This is such a heartwretching story! I can see why it won first place. The mother's anguish is palpable and described well in words. I like how instead of saying what happened, a flashback is provided, even if only moments before.
I'm here to give your poem, "Winter (Rictameter Poem)" , a Simply Positive Review. This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
I like how you describe the change of winter from autumn. Each line transistions an image that is associtated with fall to winter
Flow & Style
I think poem followed the Rictameter form well.
Suggested Improvements
The last line closes out the poem, but I think it would be better if you found another word instead of winter. Perhaps a two-syllable one to describe it in finality?
Thanks for sharing!
--Wyn
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Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Robert Frost Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honor!
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Hemingway Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honour!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impressions
Only the beginning of the story, and I'm already feeling sympathy for Kara. Her state made me wonder how she got there and what her story was. Hopefully, this will be revealed in subsequent chapters.
Storyline
Sitting in a restuarant, Ean meets Kara and she is drawn to him.
Character & Setting
So far, we see Ean as a confidant person who probably gets what he wants. Kara seems to be a demure girl who is taken advantage of and treated harshly by her boss and co-workers.
Spelling & Grammar
Excellent except for one item. In the eighth paragraph, bosses should be boss'.
Suggested Improvements
Other than the above, none.
I think I'll continue reading, even though I normally don't read Mf.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Robert Frost Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honour!
Review of
Sky Flowers (E) Hot air ballons in flight - a wonder to behold. (Form: Rictameter) #1617068 by 🌖 HuntersMoon
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
At first glance of the title in your Most Recent, before even clicking on your poem, it had me wondering what a sky flower could possibly be. I imagined flowering vines, climbing high in the forest canopy. So it was a suprise that your poem was inspired by hot-air balloons.
The title does fit the colourful sight well.
Flow & Style
The form was perfect, and the addition of the addition of the monorhyme added to it.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Robert Frost Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honour!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
Your poem was funny indeed! I didn't see the punchline coming. This is something I'm sure many guys have heard before (I know I've used the line).
Flow & Style
There seems to be no syllable requirement, so while each varies in length from eight to ten syllables, it still flowed smoothly from one line to the next.
It was all going smoothly, your perfect rhymes in the first six stanzas keeping the poem flowing, but it all came to a screeching halt with the last stanza. Maybe you constructed the poem on purpose this way, to parallel the actions of the man. If so, it was clever. If not, well, let's just leave it at if so.
I'm here to give your "Peeking into the Mangroves" , a Simply Positive review. This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impressions
Having lived in South Florida for many years, I've seen the mangroves often. It is with much sadness that I think of this vanishing beauty. Your brief description pairs well with the picture. I think, though, it would be even better if you were able to elaborate on the nature of the mangroves and it's biodiversity; where the slow-moving river that was once the Everglades meets ocean has a uniqueness not found elsewhere.
Thanks for sharing!
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I'm here to give your "C-Notes Allsorts." , a Simply Positive review. This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impressions
These c-notes are very beautiful and elegant. It certainly looks like you have one for every occassion. The price for each is affordable (I've even sent one too ).
Thanks for sharing!
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Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the H.G. Wells Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honor!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
This flash had all the elements of a story. The setting is easily imaginable. As a character, Josten's motivation presents a nice paradox. The end, while not specifically stated, is alluded to. While the beginnings are there, the demise is left to the reader's imagination.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the H.G. Wells Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honor!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
I applaud your ability to take a prompt and use it to write a story in only fifteen minutes. The story actually reads more like a timeline report, which isn't bad, but I think if you had more time, would've fleshed it out a bit more. At the end, I'm not sure whom you are referring to when you say "the woman."
Suggested Improvements
In the third line, there needs to be a comma before "Fire".
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the H.G. Wells Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honor!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
I thought this was a touching story, both sad and joyful at the same time. I like how it starts at the end and flashes back to come full circle at the end. Patrick's deep love for Sarah comes through well in the story, as does the depth of his grief.
Suggested Improvements
There are a couple times when Patrick is speaking to Sarah, that her name needs to be offset by a comma. Directory Ellison! Directory should be director.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Poe Dark Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you are receiving this honour!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
I absolutely loved this story. A child's imagination is such a powerful thing, especially to the child. Daydreams become real and stories, legends. Sometimes, we think we know what will affect a child because we used to be one, but we forget that every child is unique. We should keep in mind how children will perceve our words, because they are powerful things as well.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Poe Dark Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you are receiving this honour!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
Great story! I like how it's told from the cat's point of view. The cat ponders why it's actions are a source of irritation for it's human. The story is told with such innocence, it's a reminder of the unconditional love our pets give.
The only suggestion I have is that there looks to be a few missing commas.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Poe Dark Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you are receiving this honour!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
The title drew me in immediately. Since I enjoy certain kinds of darkness, it made me wonder what kind of darkness you created. The poem was enjoyable, with lines that flow well and easy rhymes. The end is was unexpected, but completely true to you.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the EBB Love Fan Package. The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters. I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honour!
This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impression
This is a wonderful tribute to some very fine WDC authors who have passed away. It gives a brief description of them and their writing and keeps their memory alive.
My one suggestion would be to remove the invalid items.
I'm here to give your "Stained" , a Simply Positive review. This is only my opinion, so please keep what you find useful, and disregard what you don't.
Overall Impressions
A chilling poem. Guilt does strange things to a person's mind. The man suffers from a guilty conscience so he is not a sociopath. It makes me wonder then, what made him kill the man. From the words of the last stanza, it sounds as if the victim is an older man. Burglary gone wrong, perhaps? Nevertheless, the deed is done and can never be undone and the man must forever live with his guilt.
Suggested Improvements
I don't think you need a comma after down.
Thanks for sharing!
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