Wow. Simple, creative and fluent! Excellent work my friend. The simplicity is a beautiful factor in the flow of the poem. The piece is very creative and it is one of those poems that can be read over and over again and feel it every time.
A suggestion I would give would be the use of punctuation because in my point of you it makes the poem beautifully expressive. Loads of appreciation.
I was just reading one of the writing.com newsletter, it said about how must people love to eat but don't love to read or write about eatting. Just minutes after, I came across this.
imagery:
Visual imagery is well-done job in this composition. Along with that the imagery of taste (pardon, forgot the exact term) is up to perfection.
Composition:
Short yet complete. The last line added a remarkable hint of humor.
Writing skills:
The starting began with a different visual yet the visual of the vanilla ice-cream didn't overshadow the hot fudge so it all mixed well. Your skills are remarkable.
I enjoyed reading this. Keep it up. Well done. Was unique and appreciated.
This is overwhelming! This poem... each and every verse just touches one's heart! Poetry at its best! Beautifully written. I like the mix and presence and absence of ryhmes at perfect places. Deep and splendid. The sequence is one I haven't seen in many poems but its unique and lovely. Loads of love and appreciation. Keep it up!
Wow. Interesting and classic. Beautifully expressed. The body and surroundings go down into our heart breaks with us. This point is highlighted in an impressive way. The prose is giving a poetical feeling which makes it very interesting and the deepness is just overwhelming with these simple words. Keep it up!
Beautiful and expressive! such phase as described in the poem is a phase everyone goes through. one gets depressed and his heart just doesn't connect with anything in the word. what the poem has well described is the feelings of those who try to help their loved ones out of that stage. splendid work.
for any nature-lover this poem is a must read! though it has no specific hidden meaning yet i dont know why it is giving me a feeling same as the one i get when i read Wordsworth! it is expressed beautifully, the word selection the rhyme! everything is perfect! well done! keep up the outstanding work!
Beautiful and heart-touching. I;m an admirer of both poetry and astronomy so these verses really speak to me. the hardest stage of once love-life, the letting go and moving on part is so majestically expressed. simply over-whelming! well done! keep up the epic work! brilliant!
The dark and mysterious effect that these lines leave on a reader are fascinating! made me go over three times yet the deepness kept making me over-whelmed. i'm a bit short on gift points but if i had them you deserved them! keep up the good work!
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