The story was good and yes, there's a but! My biggest gripe is editing. A when that should've been a then. Or an and should've been deleted. There was another but you need to read it aloud and you'll see it too. Readers shouldn't have to edit a story as they read. One read he was home in a tiny home. Born?
Oh my god! Such a story. I read many, write many, cry over few. Please make this a full story. My only comment is that in paragraph two you need need not identify Tom. We all know it's him speaking. Give this your attention fully as it needs written. Janette is calling you.
I am not a good poet and I know it! This I liked. As said before it's is a contraction of it is, correct is its. Wanted more so keep it up. Don't quit. Some ruin new writers so they feel better. I know! I took a writers course and what was said was wrong was in the first sentence. Luck.
Yes! This has a good base. I did cringe at a few unneeded words. I know it's common today but adds nothing. I was sad your love died. Glad you had a standby. Ached that it wasn't enough for you. I have been there, tho not the drugs. Oh for one love we all yearn. Enlarge characters tho.
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