I can't complain... Negative comments... Well, there just isn't any. And I'm here... And you're where you are in this moment. This Moment. The here and the thereafter... where's the in between. I love.
Overall, your message of pain resulting from your inability to see your child is portrayed nicely. I understand the torment one suffers when they have lost or have been separated from a child. I am in favor of the free-style format of writing; however, like with all styles of writing critique is necessary to help the individual grow as a writer. I would consider this style of poetry to be free-verse. Free-verse should still, in my opinion, be set up in poetry format. For the poem to flow more fluidly and pleasurably, particular lines beginning a new stanza should be separated. I would also be more descriptive; add a broader range of adjectives.
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