I like it, but I feel it could be fleshed out more, the last lines leave me hanging. "They heal and move on" but the scars leave a mark, something left with us, a reminder of a past experience, good or bad. Just a thought :)
I think you capture the mind of the situation but I think there is something missing. I feel, but I don't get that pit in my stomach. It seems like there should be more desperation. The poem almost seems like there is a sense of hopelessness in it, but it's not fully fulfilled. Overall solid though.
Interesting. I'd like to see it fleshed out more, but definitely a good piece. Keep it up.
The premise seems simple enough, although with all the apocalypse type stories, TV shows/Movies out there this one seems to have a bit of promise to it. I like the name Trace, and I'm interested to see where he's headed
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.09 seconds at 10:05pm on Nov 25, 2024 via server WEBX2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
