\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/ggea
Review Requests: OFF
5 Public Reviews Given
5 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Forever and a Day  Open in new Window.
Review by Ggea Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
I love it. I can sooo relate to the feelings your poem conveys. This Very Thing happened to me. Very well done!

It is good as it is, wonderful but you could even expand on it with "Trust me now for what I say. I will love you forever and a day" as a chorus to each verse. :) I feel that this line is a strong, passionate, heart-felt and powerful line and would like to see the poem open with it too.

Also, this line "Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow and that is for my heart to sorrow." is Wonderful! Another powerful statement that could be interjected at the beginning or middle.

Still and know that it is really really terrific just as it is...

Ggea
2
2
Review of True Stories  Open in new Window.
Review by Ggea Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I love these types of stories! Love hearing and relating to others little comedic moments in life. Such a wonderful idea to write them down and keep them. They are true gems that can be put together and passed down through the family for others to add theirs too or Published. :)

I would like to see more elaboration. Lengthen them and include more adjectives, descriptions, feelings; more story.

There were also a few edits that need to be done like this one..."no wonder the itch was going away." Do you mean 'wasn't' going away? And this one: "...he could do was thank my by my own name right?" my to me. :)

Ggea
2 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 1 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/ggea