A very well thought out story that really draws the reader in. The character is very well portrayed and the scene is set beautifully, I can really invisage the scene and this helps me to uderstand the character more. If I were to highlight one small thing it would be the sentence "Rarely staring at his reflection, he noticed how thin and wrinkly he had grown since his last true look at his reflection." As 'reflection' is repeated twice in the same sentence it causes the writing to jar slightly and lose its rythem. Possibly changing 'his reflection' to 'himself', or changing 'since his last true look at his reflection' to 'since he last glanced at his features' might make it read more easily.
Overall I really enjoyed reading this piece and hope you keep up the good quality work. - Genz
Nice use of characterisation, you really feel like you can empathise with the characters. Its clever how you fool the reader into thinking they're human all along and in the end they turn out to be the aliens... nice twist. If i was to point out one thing it would be the sentence 'Roots knarled up, making the path much more treacherous than it would have been, and odd pebbles shifted underfoot.' This could easily be broken down into two sentences and would sound alot more snappy if it were: 'Roots knarled up, making the path much more treacherous than it would have been.Odd pebbles shifted underfoot.'- it leads on more rythmically to the next sentence. Overall, the story is well thought out and has a plot which draws the reader into the story. Well Done.
A very accurate and lyrical description of Scotland. The atmosphere is beautifully described and there is very good use of imagery and alliteration which evokes a very realistic scene. I live in the Scottish lowlands but have occassionally been up north and can relate to the detail. A very rythmical poem. Well Done.
To tell you the truth, it's quite hard to define how often i write. Most of the time i get at least some writing done every week (whether its essays for school or creative). But sometimes this changes if i have severe writers block and am on holiday (in those cases i may not write for a month or so) or if there is a pile of homework for school or if i'm feeling really writing orientated (then i might write every day for a couple of weeks). To simplify this i just put 'Weekly'. Good poll even if it doesn't totally cover mixed-up people like me.
A consise and accurate step-by-step guide to understanding your statistics page. I think this article is very useful and benefitted much from reading it. Contains useful information set out in an easy-to-understand way. It will be a great help to anyone who wishes to understand their readiing, writing and reviewing statistics. Well done.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/genzb
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.10 seconds at 3:56am on Nov 13, 2024 via server WEBX2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
