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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/cyndihaltom02
Review Requests: OFF
15 Public Reviews Given
15 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review by Cyndi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
I think you did a good job on this one, it's hard to write prose without rhyme and I think you accomplished your objective quite well. I especially liked "blanket of dreams" and "dimples of tracks in the fresh snow". This was a well versed idea that is difficult to accomplish. One suggestion, you might consider using more punctuation for definition of your emotions and what you are wanting the reader to experience. Otherwise, good job!
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Review of Finding the Light  Open in new Window.
Review by Cyndi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.0)
I love this, I laughed and laughed, dust mite indeed!
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Review by Cyndi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Fantastic! You relayed the excitement of the moment perfectly. I thought it would be a swarm of bees but the biting black flies was a great twist. Thanks for a wonderful story with perfect visual stimulation.
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Review of Brave  Open in new Window.
Review by Cyndi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
I love this, you captured exactly how I felt when I was in my first year of HS. I'd almost forgotten how frightened I was, a new place, new kids, new teachers and a different way of learning. It was all so scary. You did a great job, thanks!
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Review of Crystal Clear  Open in new Window.
Review by Cyndi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I thoroughly enjoyed this poem, it's alive with description and brings that to the reader.
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Review by Cyndi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Your story has definite potential, I'd love to read more. Keep up the good work.
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Review of Passing of Summer  Open in new Window.
Review by Cyndi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
Interesting read. I too have a great fondness for summer and miss it the day before summer ends. I like the way you led us right into Fall and how many times we welcome the coolness. I too am a woodworker, I love the feel and texture of it in my hands. Thank you and have a really great Winter. I look forward to summer already.
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Review of The Frozen Start  Open in new Window.
Review by Cyndi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (1.5)
The intent is there but I think you need to re-read your story because there is a lot of grammar problems and it makes your story hard to read. There is potential, however, so give it a second try and see what you are able to fix. I'd love to read the rewrite.
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Review by Cyndi Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (2.5)
I like your story but I question this comment,

"The ground littered with empty pringle packets, half-eaten takeaways and beer bottles".

How did you see these things at night and only saw the black silhouettes of drunken men. It doesn't seem to work in my head but perhaps I'm look at it wrong. Anyway, good beginning, hope you finish.
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