What a great page! We all need a kickstart sometimes and we often do not see the prompts that are in front of us. This page provides the live feed to get the thought processes going again. Brilliant idea, thank you so much.
I do not write poetry and would not call myself any kind of expert on it so this is just my feelings and opinion as a casual reader. I liked the interesting word use to put over the poems meaning, I guess it is a universal truth that all roads do lead to the same place. It just does not feel like it sometimes!
There is a nice flow to this poem which I think also helps project the meaning in so few words.
Keep at it.
I don't normally do poetry but this really hit the spot for me. The poem itself describes my current situation pretty accurately. The repititions work well, bringing the point home and providing the rhythm for the piece. I don't feel qualified to offer any advice, all I can say is this poem really spoke to me.
Interesting stuff here, I see where the username comes from now. I can't see the connection with the prologue and first chapter yet, no doubt it will be revealed as things progress. Should 'exhibitions' in line 4 be 'expeditions'? I was also thrown in Chapter 1, paragraph 8 by the sudden change in person, the whole piece is written in the third person from Kyleigh's viewpoint then suddenly changes to first person 'we as cryptozoologists' then back to third person again.
I can't quite put my finger on exactly what makes me think this but I feel the whole piece would benefit from tightening up perhaps just a rewrite, that most difficult thing o do on your own work. I am interested to see where this leads so keep writing!
CJR
Well that certainly hit the spot with me, I am going through a 'rough patch' as my wife is having an affair. Although the poem is from the female perspective it still rings very true for me. I think the only thing I am not sure about is several points were words are repeated within a line or two, this doesn't sound right to me, but perhaps it is just a style thing. Other than that I really enjoyed it and it felt good to know I am not alone in thesev difficult times. Thank you. CJR
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/cjrandall
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.11 seconds at 11:11am on Nov 14, 2024 via server WEBX2.