It's a good description, maybe add in things like the smell she gets when she comes through the door. Also since the house seemed to be lived in by a bunch of people you could describe different things those people may also have. Or example you said something about bikes being kept their, you could probably add in some other character items.
I've heard something similar to "You have to love yourself first before someone else can". I can agree and relate with that statement and your writing is running along that same path. I can agree with getting back to a happy place, putting yourself first. In your [ to be continued...] you may want to also address what happens when things they use to do aren't as exciting to them anymore. What's next for them, how to go about finding happiness in new things. Just a thought...
This was really... I can't really find the word for it, I want to say detailed at the beginning. Iy'ate really caught my attention as she seemed to be an interesting character. From where you've left off my interest was peaked.
I had a hard time reading this, for me it was the story of Paul who may or may not be a drunk. He likes to people watch and is very interested in the color of peoples eyes. That could be interesting, but it felt like it dragged.
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