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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/bendetti
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Review by Tee Bendetti Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I like the concept of the poem very much, and I like the imagery you use, except for "waking up with a jump, falling, landing, with a thump" i think those lines throw off the poem and would suggest that you reconsider changing up "jump and thump"....but other than that I liked it. Keep writing!
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