A QUICK HEADS UP: Please keep in mind that I'm merely a reader and writer, not a professional. I only offer my humble opinions and suggestions. Feel free to take what you can use and ditch the rest.
First, I must give you kudos for piquing my curiosity right off the bat. I simply
had to read your item once I saw the title and description. What a way to snag a reader. Couple my initial interest of your title with the first line and I was sold.
"You can learn a lot about anatomy in a hundred years, particularly if you can’t die." This was a great line to set the atmosphere in this short piece. It felt dark, a little gloomy. The subsequent paragraphs gave me a visual of the scene without overindulging in description. I liked this. Two thumbs up.
Having said that, I think there may be a few small things you can do to improve this item and make it really pop off the page, or rather, the computer screen...
TECHNICAL BITS:
The ordinary peeps in the world, use them for everything, from drowning out junior’s teething cries to writing angsty teenage wails of rebellion with gritty lyrics and dis-chordant guitars and of course they use them to escape. -- This line here is a bit of a mouthful, but it kind of works. However, I would suggest moving the first comma in between "world" and "use" and place it in front of "of course." As it reads, the pause after "world" isn't necessary for the flow of the line, but a pause can be used towards the end.
RANDOM BITS:
Is this a piece from a larger work? This almost felt like a prologue or snipet of something bigger. Especially with the first and last lines. There was also the big unanswered question: Is the narrator really just a paramedic? You left me guessing. I want to read more
Overall, I think this is a really good piece of flash fiction. With a tiny bit of tweaking, it could really be awesome.
Thanks for posting!
KrisAnn S. Bell