\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/annalouise
Review Requests: OFF
2 Public Reviews Given
3 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Lost in the Woods  Open in new Window.
Review by annalouise Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Emyrn, I have already written a comment about your short story but I forgot to make it public, as I am not used to move around easily in this site yet. It seems to have vanished, just like your frogs with the fog !
I had told you that I found your tale quite well plotted, in a pleasant language.
I like this idea of yours about a fox helping a human !
I had also mentioned that your conclusion seemed too drastic to me : I would have made a difference between a real flute played by someone I know or an artist in true life, and a supernatural flute calling to carelessness and danger !
But as a whole, I much enjoyed my reading.
2
2
Review by annalouise Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hello Yolli, I have enjoyed reading your piece of memory concerning your first day at a gym training.
I must say I do not quite understand the first half of it, whereas the second half is perfect and funny for me.
I might be wrong but your title "My first day back" seems confusing : I understand : the day I came back. It is not what you mean, is it ? So as to avoid confusion, I would have put something like : The first day I went to the gym, or something like that. Your sentence beginning with "Music is pumping away ... " is not clear for me : a verb is written as if the subject was singular and I can see but a plural subject !
Congratulations for your "alien looking veins" and for your witty look upon yourself !
I am not used to move about in the site yet and I have had difficulties in finding you ...
Thank you for reading my first text too. I emailed you a message, I do not know whether you have been able to read it. French is my first language, in fact and I would like readers here to correct my English.
You nicely gave me 4, another unknown reader made it 3,5. But as I have only got your too (!) kind appreciation, I cannot improve my text ! Best regards, Annalouise.
2 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 1 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/annalouise