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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/afaith
Review Requests: OFF
677 Public Reviews Given
678 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Honest and methodical.
I'm good at...
Short stories; grammar.
Favorite Genres
Fantasy and Action
Least Favorite Genres
Horror and Melodrama
Favorite Item Types
Under 5k words.
Least Favorite Item Types
n/a
I will not review...
n/a
Public Reviews
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1
1
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
LOL! Did you grow up in Flint!? Ooooo, memories. Did you ever add the story behind the song? Should update this with that story!!!
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Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
gorgeous, simply stunning in its simplicity; as always, sorry for your loss


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3
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Thank you for sharing this rare perspective! That ending was absolutely beautiful.


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4
4
Review of Writing.Com 101  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
This, is FASCINATING! I consider myself relatively smart but cryptos still baffle me. How long does it generally take before reaching 20 GP mined? I'm at a 4k total with zero mined yet.
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Review of Staycation  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hey! Congrats on winning the Writer's Cramp!

This is a WDC Power Reviewers Review!

Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

cute story, just wish it had some sort of twist, like Wade's first job was in the attic and he created himself a little oasis of escape while his wife thought he was working on fixing stuff in the attic

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" Open in new Window..


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6
6
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
that. was. awesome!

makes me really sad we don't have social media share buttons but I may manually post the link anyway, keep up the good work!


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7
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Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
interesting, think i'm going to go searching for more political poems after this. it's not till the end that I even have a clue which side you're leaning on, or even if you're on a side; and I like that.

"As they fold blindly and aimlessly
Towards every wayward,
Unison, frothy discourse."
could be Republicans, they are certainly more unified than, Dems, but it could also be Dems

"Of this notorious, yet functional
President of the wealthy
And working Union. "
now, my favorite word here is "functional"
are you supporting Trump or merely pointing out that this is the politician we deserve given our careless and wanton approach to politics over the past...ever


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8
8
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.0)
the rhyming made it easy to read, simple flow

perhaps I don't know enough about sports but the end didn't make much sense to me, sounded like forced rhymes: "Own the grooves, Earth’s shorter axis.
Tomorrow’s built and where the max is;
Just keep vying, no new taxes. "

tomorrow we'll keep striving for the 'max'? perfection? ok
'no new taxes'? taxing workouts? i dunno, disappointing end

"Gravitate toward being clutch.
Doing more serves as the crutch;
Attempt to shoulder these and such."

doing more is a crutch? how so? over performing maybe and making more mistakes?
'such' sounds like a very forced rhyme; perhaps "Attempt to shoulder these 'too much' " as another nod to working too hard and "doing more"

this poem makes you think but not quite in the way you intended I think, I'm more distracted with the clumsy rhymes than the good moral of the poem


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9
9
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (3.0)
Heeeeyyy, to this is interesting.

I like how you use words like "superb, stylish, and classy" I feel like you're looking at their clothes and how they keep themselves together, not just their looks

I take it you like to do stuff in the car?

Interesting how you say "We might pose a subversive and chancy question" that's a cute way of saying 'talk dirty'

I like the word usage in this poem but overall it's too vague, instead of using terms like "we might" and "their homes" try telling a 1st person narrative to draw the reader in and make them feel like a part of the story, or better yet, make them want to be you


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10
Review of pieces  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
ooooo, I like how you juxtaposed a mirror with an earth crystal/jewel

interesting piece, would appreciate some capitalization for some sort of style

not sure I get "placed together again"; I assume that's referring to the broken person who doesn't like what they see in the mirror but it may not quite work with the crystal analogy but then again maybe a geology lover would know better

the last line puts me in the mind of 'uniqueness is better then our own trivial expectations of beauty'


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11
11
Review of Gaston and Yvonne  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Well Hi-Dee-Ho There!

This is a WDC Power Reviewers Review!

Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!

*Reading* Initial hook: cute Rapunzel like poem

*Pencil* Storyline:Gaston peeps upon Yvonne

*Tiedye4* Characters:Gaston and Yvonne

*Home* Setting:a tower

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone:quaint, nursery rhyme-ish

*Suitheart* What I liked:the rhyme scheme

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*That burned there through midnight to dawn.
the quick repetition is a bit much, also maybe take out "through"

A few parting comments...
cute poem!



Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
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Smallest sig yet
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


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12
12
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is an awesome idea and I'm honored to be one of the lucky few featured!!!!!!
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Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
I like how you start out by explaining your fairy's name.
I also like how you number and label all your various collections.
I for one am curious as to what makes a rising star. I've always been a bit jealous that I wasn't picked out and sponsored when I first arrived, but the yellow case made it all better *Pthb*

I look forward to returning and perusing your port at my leisure.
I found my way here by way of the random "Read and Review" link.


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14
14
Review of NaNoWriMo Prep  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
sounds interesting, i like that she's most afraid of losing her job, what will she do to keep it? probably go to counseling, but how/where/when will she find relief and what pitfalls will trip her up along the way?

excited, hope you finish!


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15
15
Review of Cab Ride  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
This is really funny/frightening all at the same time. Borderline black comedy? Least it would have been had he actually died, glad he didn't though.

Grammar Nazi: I really like punctuation at the end of poetry lines, it helps me to see where the writer intended for there to be a breath.

Would love to hear you read this in
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Poetry Readings Open in new Window. (E)
Hear WDC poets read their poems aloud
#2076004 by Elle - on hiatus Author IconMail Icon


AFAITH POWER REVIEW CAPTAIN!


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16
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Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a
** Image ID #2017264 Unavailable **
Comedy Review!


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!


*Reading* Initial hook: it's amazing how brainwashed we all are, I couldn't think of another answer first if I tried

*Pencil* Theme: Un-da the Sea!

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: random comedy

*Suitheart* What I liked: diversity of answers

A few parting comments...
wish you were around to give the background on this one and so I could see the related item; proud of myself because I chose "I eat pineapples for breakfast!!!" cuz that sounds tasty right about now...'yo mama!' was a good one too...
It's impressive how many responses you guys got on this poll!

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
17
17
Review of #bestvacationever  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a
** Image ID #2017264 Unavailable **
Comedy Review!


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!


*Reading* Initial hook: too cute, love the title and mostly successful rhymes!

*Pencil* Theme: #unplugged

*Tiedye4* Characters: typical 4.0 suburban tech family

*Home* Setting: digital home to the natural wilderness

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: Millennial; digital; then familial

*Suitheart* What I liked: use of the pizza emoji!; tweets from the birdies;
“It Sprg Br8k,” replied my son and
“smh…girl ain’t got no butt for that dress”
To Facebook my daughter posted that mess HA!

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

(Original quotes will be in black, any changes or suggestions I'll make in blue to make it clear)

*BulletG*“..., starting tomorrow”
I then heard a gasp of guttural horror
we maybe be stuck with the pseudo rhyme, but to help the flow maybe: 'Then I heard gasps...' OR 'Then came the gasp, 'O the HORROR!'

A few parting comments...
I'm impressed that a Dad knew so much tech-crap jargin, I had to look at your Bio to get a glimpse of your age or at least what you do for a living; 43 at time of writing, gives you Kewl Kredits ;-P even as an Engineer you could choose to stay out the loop but sounds like you enjoy dallying with the rest of us silly creatures!

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


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18
18
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a
** Image ID #2017264 Unavailable **
Comedy Review!


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!


*Reading* Initial hook: I like these 'what if' analogies

*Suitheart* What I liked: the premise

A few parting comments...
were their more characters? I'm not that familiar but I remember Gilligan, Professor and Skipper then "the millionaire and his wife, the movie star, and...other people *Pthb*;
haven't they had celebrity survivor? it would be amazing to see the actual actors have to survive for a week or two, but the surviving cast is probably too old...time for a reboot!

what even prompted this topic?!

was thinking 3.5 stars but this trip down memory lane (theme song's stuck in my head) and the imagination spark bumped it to 4

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
19
19
Review of It's November  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
Welcome to the site!

I like this poem. Is it freestyle?

Favorite lines:
Somehow it's time
For appointments I made
...
To now be recognized and kept.

This is almost eerie because it's like 'what appointments are those?!'

Interesting: your double use of "somehow", trips me up when I hear people use that in real life, as if their actions (or those made by the world) are of no consequence


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20
20
Review of Heat  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
oooo, I like-a this; the color and center justification works well; nonet's are fun, think I'll do a few for NaPoWriMo

only suggestion: comma after first line

thinking too much: 'drops to set' makes me think it's at least past noon, but since poem is so short this doesn't add much but is a nice puzzle piece to fit the syllable requirement!

AFAITH POWER REVIEW CAPTAIN!


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21
21
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
Hey!

This is a
** Image ID #2017264 Unavailable **
Comedy Review!


Please remember that these are just my thoughts, at the end of the day whatever you decide is the right answer!


*Reading* Initial hook: the topic drew me in and the 'golf course' story flow of it kept me interested

*Pencil* Theme: the strength of abstinence

*Pencil* Storyline: workaholic turns church volunteer end in an exciting rendezvous with his wife

*Butterflyb* Atmosphere/Tone: bit exaggerated/print version of a joke mature/old men tell their friends

*Telephone* Dialogue: I liked the characteristic of the pastor was paying attention to the couple every week then his inner monologue towards the end

*Suitheart* What I liked: the willingness of the husband to go along with the test

*Tools* A few comments/suggestions I had:

*Bullet*Grammar Nazi stuff
don't start sentences with 'and'/'but';
the young people they will be working with, [comma] that it is the best policy."

A few parting comments...
the first two lines make me think this is a true story, is it true? what happened after this, did the husband make more family time?

Hope this helped! Great job on a great piece of readable art!!!

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers:
This Has Been A Review By: AFaith A WDC Power Reviewer
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
22
22
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
cute, very straightforward, I can imagine you writing this while sitting in a park...or on my college campus (then again, at my school the squirrels would probably mug you and run off with your writing utensils)

if there is a pattern, it's not obvious, I suggest posting the style

Fav line: Efficiently calm, yet noticeably nervous,

3.5/5 because on it's own it's just not...exciting/interesting enough, though it looks like a great warm-up piece and would go nicely with an illustration


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23
23
Review of Mental Illness  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
I think Alder's quote speaks volumes.

Having gone through a break down and coming out the other side a much more self-possessed individual, I feel even more strongly about this particular stigma.

It's all about ego really....

I think everyone suffers from mental 'illness' for the simple fact that we all have brains [supposedly].

It's safe to say everyone will get physically sick/ill at least once in their life. So then why is it not safe to say every living being will experience varying degrees of mental health in a typical lifespan?

Thank you for sharing!

4.5/5 because I like to see headers/bold/some form of topic separation in OpEd pieces.


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24
24
Review of Spring / Acrostic  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (2.5)
Saw your "Note: Hey! I've got 10 items in my port which I woul..." and decided to come by and see what you had Highlighted in your portfolio.

Pros: Cute, concise.
Cons: Typical, expected.

I can see this next to a vibrant spring mural depicting all of these things. On it's own I recommend playing with the text colors and line placement [for instance, centering the text would bring more life to it].

Not bad, keep it up!

GOOD JOB! AFAITH PR CAPTAIN


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25
25
Review of Poetry Readings  Open in new Window.
Review by A*Monaing*Faith Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Without even listening to my first poem I know I LOOOVE THIS IDEA! I just want to give the same suggestion I gave the WDC Live program:

I can't always watch YouTube at work and it takes up bandwidth when not using WiFi. In addition to videos, can you also suggest mp3 submissions to be placed in a podcast? Also, in the interest of space conservation, adding dropdown lists for those with more than 5 poems would be awesome. If interested in either, I am available to help!
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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/afaith