Not a bad story from first person perspective. Main character does a fine job of expressing his unique point of view that rises far above the category of 'generic', it also transitions well as he recollects over many decades, this however is where an issue comes up with the content - the story suggests the docks are, despite it's unflattering appearances to most people, had an important value to the family - or at least the old man himself. The camera man also added to the chilling atmosphere, causing me to immediately wonder at conspiracies and drew in my curiosoty. Unfortunately it felt like the best details were not explained. A more provocative reason than 'he just happened to be there taking pictures' would give the story a strong leg to stand on, as well as other details of the old man's life as it transitions. Without those traits there is no personal connection to be had with the material. Also, the first paragraph has a limited choice of sentence types, many starting with 'the' word, and being similar in length/style. After this point it builds up well with nice prose and flows with a solid structure.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/adrealist
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.10 seconds at 2:18pm on Dec 22, 2024 via server WEBX2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
