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| Encompassing every alley are derelicts Straight out of the haunted asylums, Closed before dawn of a promised new age Of mental health, now with their crack cocaine wishes, And their plastic cups filled with dirty tap water, It is these individuals I see myself in, Maybe in a different world I would be one of them, Clinging to social security, never finding an occupation, No goals, just s*** they have on the backs of their pants, And frightening maladroit tongues out with tardive dyskenesia. I meet them at close of day among eighteenth century houses, All have resigned their part in this casual comedy, A schizophrenic beauty is born. |
| I just wanted to share how wonderful life really is being sober. No longer do I wake up in the morning regretting the night before, or all the money I spent. I wake up refreshed and ready to go about my day. I am certain that there isn't any other way. I used to think I could manage my drinking, but I would have to have a beer right when I woke up just to feel right. Hair of the dog, or whatever. I am grateful for everyone who has stood by me during my difficulties with schizoaffective disorder and drug addiction. I know that I have been hard to deal with at times, but I just want the world to know, you don't know what's coming from me. I see great things ahead. |
| Congratulations on winning that battle. |
Reply| We sat around listening to old stale rock songs, Thinking of our emptiness, Talking about our emptiness as we always did, Going nowhere, pretending to be ambulatory, It was all we could do these days, When all around us spoke in a foreign language About how wonderful life actually is, But we only saw the grey sounds coming out of the stereo. Yesterday we saw a flash of light from the sky, Delusional hallucinations are sometimes more real, Than the passage of time as we grew older, But never changing the station. |
| All I hear is screaming, and in the trees demon faces mock me. I’m not sure what exactly you would call this, perhaps schizophrenia, yet how am I able to type as well as I can? I’m just kidding, that was two years ago, and my functioning was a lot worse than it is now, because I take the right medications and eat healthy (at least try to everyday). Psychosis is a very elusive disorder, and the experience is completly alien and bizzare. I am aware that it might sound scarry to some, or even humerous whenever somenone encounters a psychotic individual, which is a lot more common that you think. About one percent of the population has schizophrenia, and .5 percent has schizoaffective disorder (which is what I have). I am asymptomatic right now, so I’m not chronic, and am very lucky. I may not even need disability because I’m pretty successful at what I do: lead generation. May strike you as odd, considering people with schizophrenic illnesses have some social awkwardness, yet I view my interactions with people in the best possible way, and I am able to come out of my shell and produce leads, set appointments and generate sales. |
| Terraformation You’ve held them tight with arduous hands, Relishing the redolent scent of their hair, Praying for the cacophony of the bond between To dissipate into a carefully woven dreamscape, Where there is no up and down—but side by side Forever. You screamed in spheres brighter than any morning, Of worlds you’d create, Terraformed from nothingness, luminescent hues of green, Your love resembled divine prescience—you had it all, But now this fortitude is mere dissonance of a barren moon, And you begin to dream. |
| There has always been some statistical knowledge that the prevelance of schizophrenia is higher in urban areas. To me, there is very simple explanation to this. There are more resources in cities. Schizophrenics are not stupid people, and they know how to use the system. I live in York city, and suffer, or should I say, I just have schizophrenia, and the charity organizations are urgent in feeding the homeless, who seem to be more likely than most to suffer from mental illness, including schizophrenia. There is also a hospital, where they will readily accept medicade, and it is quite easy to be admitted, just by saying you have suicidal ideations. Hey, sometimes you gotta lie a bit to get the services that you need, and I’m telling you, the York Wellspan Hospital has the best food, and it is as much as you can eat. So, when the winter comes, and you are still homesless, and running out of time that you can sleep at the mission, you can always fake some suicidal ideations and go to where the free food is. Ok, well, the food isn’t free, and it is paid for by taxpayers, but even though I am a schizophrenic, I also happen to have a pretty decent work history, so I don’t feel a weight on my conscience for eating food that I somehow probably paid for anyway. Food is everything, and there is plenty of free food in york, and people who are willing to give you a dollar or two, or trading some weed for some beer. I used to “live off the land” at night when I was in the middle of a psychosis. It was beautiful, the colors the lights, the grandiose delusions that seemed to take away all paranoia I usually feel, and leave with me with a sense of invinciblity. Right now, I am sittling outside with a man who is walking up and down the yard here talking to himself, threating to kick someone’s ass, and fortunatly he is not talking to me, because the dude is pretty big and sort of scarry, but I am used to it. I have been in an institution for the past year and a half, and have seen quite a bit of violence, of which, I know how to avoid. Do not confront these people or take what they say personally when they are in the grips of solipsistic sollilique. They do not know what they are, or how they are affecting the world, because they are in their own world all to themselves durring these rants and tangents. |
| I just got out of the hospital for the mentally ill two weeks ago, and life is a bit different now that the covid 19 pandemic swept across the nation, which people are currently recovering from. I also am in recovery from drug addiction. My co-existing disorders include schizoaffective disorder and opiate dependence. I hope someone would like to reach out and talk to me about any of their experiences dealing with either or both. Perhaps we could give each other hope in this often time hopeless world |
| There has always been some statistical knowledge that the prevelance of schizophrenia is higher in urban areas. To me, there is very simple explanation to this. There are more resources in cities. Schizophrenics are not stupid people, and they know how to use the system. I live in York city, and suffer, or should I say, I just have schizophrenia, and the charity organizations are urgent in feeding the homeless, who seem to be more likely than most to suffer from mental illness, including schizophrenia. There is also a hospital, where they will readily accept medicade, and it is quite easy to be admitted, just by saying you have suicidal ideations. Hey, sometimes you gotta lie a bit to get the services that you need, and I’m telling you, the York Wellspan Hospital has the best food, and it is as much as you can eat. So, when the winter comes, and you are still homesless, and running out of time that you can sleep at the mission, you can always fake some suicidal ideations and go to where the free food is. Ok, well, the food isn’t free, and it is paid for by taxpayers, but even though I am a schizophrenic, I also happen to have a pretty decent work history, so I don’t feel a weight on my coscience. |
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