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 |  Just play: don't look at your hands! |
What a dumb title for a person who never got a single star  on her piano lessons!Daily practice is the thing though: the practice of noticing as well as of writing.  However, I'd much rather play duets than solos, so hop right in! You can do the melody or the base part, I don't care.  Just play along--we'll make up the tune as we go. I'll try to write regularly and deliberately. Sometimes I will do it poorly, tritely, stiltedly, obscurely. I will try to persevere regardless. It seems to be where my heart wants to go, and that means to me that God wants me there too. See you tomorrow. ![Merit Badge in Journaling
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| The moment passed when I thought of something good to write about, and here I am with a moment but zip. So, here's an email joke that made me laugh. We get these things about the USA all the time, but never about GB. Hope you'll enjoy it too. Why We Like The British FROM BRITISH NEWSPAPERS 1) Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur Purdey about a large gas bill, a spokesman for North West Gas said, "We agree it was rather high for the time of year. It's possible Mr. Purdey has been charged for the gas used up during the explosion that destroyed his house." (The Daily Telegraph) 2) Police reveal that a woman arrested for shoplifting had a whole salami in her underwear. When asked why, she said it was because she was missing her Italian boyfriend. (The ManchesterEvening News) 3) Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen van, because they cannot issue a description. It's a Special Branch vehicle and they don't want the public to know what it looks like. (The Guardian) 4) A young girl who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth was rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast guard spokesman commented, "This sort of thing is all too common". (The Times) 5) At the height of the gale, the harbour master radioed a coastguard and asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was sorry, but he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown his Land Rover off the cliff. ( Aberdeen Evening Express) 6) Mrs. Irene Graham of Thorpe Avenue , Boscombe, delighted the audience with her reminiscence of the German prisoner of war who was sent each week to do her garden. He was repatriated at the end of 1945, she recalled. "He'd always seemed a nice friendly chap, but when the crocuses came up in the middle of our lawn in February 1946, they spelt out 'Heil Hitler.'" (Bournemouth Evening Echo) A list of actual announcements that London Tube train drivers have made to their passengers... 1) "Ladies and Gentlemen, I do apologize for the delay to your service. I know you're all dying to get home, unless, of course, you happen to be married to my ex-wife, in which case you'll want to cross over to the Westbound and go in the opposite direction." 2) "Your delay this evening is caused by the line controller suffering from E & B syndrome: not knowing his elbow from his backside. I'll let you know any further information as soon as I'm given any." 3) "Do you want the good news first or the bad news? The good news is that last Friday was my birthday and I hit the town and had a great time. The bad news is that there is a point's failure somewhere between Stratford and East Ham, which means we probably won't reach our destination." 4) "Ladies and gentlemen, we apologize for the delay, but there is a security alert at Victoria station and we are therefore stuck here for the foreseeable future, so let's take our minds off it and pass some time together. All together now.... 'Ten green bottles, hanging on a wall.....'." 5) "We are now traveling through Baker Street ... As you can see, Baker Street is closed. It would have been nice if they had actually told me, so I could tell you earlier, but no, they don't think about things like that." 6) "Beggars are operating on this train. Please do NOT encourage these professional beggars. If you have any spare change, please give it to a registered charity. Failing that, give it to me." 7) During an extremely hot rush hour on the Central Line, the driver announced in a West Indian drawl: "Step right this way for the sauna, ladies and gentleman... unfortunately, towels are not provided." 8) "Let the passengers off the train FIRST!" (Pause.) "Oh go on then, stuff yourselves in like sardines, see if I care - I'm going home...." 9) "Please allow the doors to close. Try not to confuse this with 'Please hold the doors open.' The two are distinct and separate instructions." 10) "Please note that the beeping noise coming from the doors means that the doors are about to close. It does not mean throw yourself or your bags into the doors." 11) "We can't move off because some idiot has their hand stuck in the door." 12) "To the gentleman wearing the long grey coat trying to get on the second carriage - what part of 'stand clear of the doors' don't you understand?" 13) "Please move all baggage away from the doors." (Pause..) "Please move ALL belongings away from the doors." (Pause...) "This is a personal message to the man in the brown suit wearing glasses at the rear of the train: Put the pie down, Four-eyes, and move your bl**dy golf clubs away from the door before I come down there and shove them up your a**e sideways!" 14) "May I remind all passengers that there is strictly no smoking allowed on any part of the Underground. However, if you are smoking a joint, it's only fair that you pass it round the rest of the carriage." |
| Sorry I've been gone so long. I can't say "No excuse," because I can think of dozens of them. But I have missed being here, and when I've had time, I haven't had anything to say. Right now, dragonfly_mist's recipe for squash with sausage is cooking in my pan, but it's almost done. I made it a couple of weeks ago and thought it was terrific. This time I've had all sorts of delays. I intended to fix it Monday night, but realized I'd forgotten to buy shallots, which I'd left out last time too, and I wanted to do it right. Tuesday we had a big chef salad because we'd both had extra calorie lunches out. Last night, okay, I was ready. Bill got home before me and cooked the squash in advance. Oops, no mushrooms! Tonight was the night. Oops, he finished off the celery last night while he waited for me to come up with something else for dinner. Oh well. It's happening anyway, minus a stalk of celery. Darn, though, it seems more complicated and doesn't smell nearly as good to me. Bill just came in, and he thinks it smells great. *** Dinner's over. He liked it better than I did this time, but that's okay. There's enough left for lunch tomorrow. That's what the Joy of Cooking calls "Plan-overs." One recipe in that book, in that category, is called "Twice Blessed." *** Saturday we drove up to my daughter's and stayed in a motel she told me about. It's a Ramada that's just being/been redecorated, and there are three pools inside, one with a big slide, (and one outside, closed for the season.) They kept the water nice and warm, unusual for a motel pool, and the kids had a good time. So did the grown-ups. We all tried the slide too. Sophie was reluctant, and I couldn't talk her into going with me. Her mother even went back to our room for the life jacket, thinking that would take care of her fears. I tried telling Sophie that, when you know something isn't really going to hurt you but you're afraid of it anyway, it's best to face into it and do it. You always feel better about yourself afterwards. That didn't work. She had a good time last year on a similar slide in Jamaica, so I didn't want her to let herself get away with being scared. So I told her I have something I'm trying to get up the courage to do too: parasailing in the water behind (above!) a boat. I didn't say anything else. She just looked at me and said, "Okay, I'll try." And, although she didn't go up a second time, she came out of the water smiling with her thumbs up. *** What else have I been doing? I've met two new, interesting patients, but I'll save their stories for another time. I've also been eBaying. First, I was looking for new swim trunks for Bill to fit his smaller size. Then I got some things out of our closets, got them photographed and up for sale. Only two out of the five have bids on them, but they're much higher than I expected. I lowered the price on one of the remaining three, and need a better photo for another. Four days yet to go. We'll see. I intended to add more, with the idea that the more you have for sale at once, the better your chances. I know I usually look to see what else someone has for sale, so that I can get a break on the shipping and handling fees. That gives you a lot more viewers, and each one might see something worth bidding on. Time to go catch up on what you all have been up to. 'Bye. |
| Today was a day of strange conversations. Strange and sad. The first was with a 40 yr old woman who is dying of cancer, who has lived at least 18 months longer than expected and is still going strong. She has not been able to be very active, and the steroids she was on gave her a huge appetite. She had always been very lanky, but has gained probably 60 pounds. She has become very demanding, and does not think clearly all the time. This has strained her marriage relationship greatly, all her family relationships in fact. Last weekend she and her husband went on a Marriage Enrichment Weekend. I had high hopes that the exercises they'd be doing, and the time spent alone together in a nice place, would bring back some of the love and romance that her husband once felt for her. Her report of the weekend was that it hadn't been "disastrous." They had talked about their goals for their marriage and decided that they needed to make some changes, to formulate some goals that are more attainable where she won't feel like a failure. (Until her illness they had been living up to their goals of a Christian home and a home-based business, as well as working at evangelistic ministries for children.) Her husband told her that he was not attracted to fat people, or inactive people, but that he would not be lured away from his responsibilities by other women or pornography. In other words, no loving but at least he won't leave her. The second person I visited told me of her great fear of witches, and about several encounters with "pure witches." Later in the day I met a new patient who has maybe a week to live. She was asleep, but her husband talked with me. He has recently moved into a nice senior apartment with its own kitchen, but he chooses to eat in the other building, in the boarding area. He said he doesn't intend to be without a housekeeper and cook for long, pointing to his wife. He likes being married, he said, and intends to find another wife quickly. People sure come in different varieties. |
| Nearly a month ago, on 10-10, I was stewing about what to do about Thanksgiving, when I uncovered a handout with good advice. It had two columns titled: When I Feel Responsible For Others and When I Feel Responsible To Others. Here I am, stewing about the same thing over again. My ex called me to talk about Thanksgiving. He didn't know why Hap didn't know about his plans (to have all ex's family at the beach for the holiday,) and he made out like that was Hap's fault but that that wasn't important. Hap had told him he now had made plans with me, and could I, who had known about ex's plans, possibly get out of my reservations and free Hap up to go to the beach with the rest of the family. I said I'd look into it. It will cost me $50 to cancel my reservations, which are already paid for, but I would do that if Hap, now that he understands his dad's plan, wants to go to the beach. Okay. Hap sounded sort of excited on the phone, but said he really wanted his dad to say, "I'd really like to spend some time with you." I passed on the message to his dad. But then, two days later, Hap tells me no, he'd rather come be with us; and he evidently told his dad the same thing. Evidently the personal invitation he'd wanted didn't happen. Okay. I haven't canceled anything yet. So, I get an email from ex asking if Bill and I would like to come be with them at the beach if he can get another room? (I'm sure he's not planning on paying for it.) "Are we that sophisticated, that we could be around each other without tension?" he asked. That tensed me right up! Anyway, I wonder what brought that about, so I try calling both son and daughter with no answer. Eventually Hap calls back and says he still wants to go with us. Daughter calls back tonight and thinks it would be dandy if we were all going to the beach together. I feel torn. Bill is willing to do whatever, just wants me to make up my mind. I have made it up; it just keeps getting unmade. Well, remembering the handout I found, I reminded myself that it was my feeling responsible for Hap that got me into this in the first place, and here I am trying to make it work out well for all of them again. I'll be darned. What do I want to do? I don't want to go be tense and help ex's newest wife make Thanksgiving dinner for fifteen people in a motel kitchen. Nor do I want to be company and let her wait on me, although I did have to ponder that one for a minute.  Even though that motel has been totally redone, it's one my mother and dad used to like. I took her back there once, just the two of us, after Daddy died. It was cold and damp. I suspect this Thanksgiving will be cold and damp there too. I opt for Skamania Lodge, with its big stone fireplaces and delicious food. There will just be the six of us-- Hap, his wife Liz, Lucy, Katie, Bill and me-- but we'll have a nice time. And the rest of them probably will too. We'll all have plenty to be thankful for, even if we're not all together. |
I notice it's getting late, but I just put a movie on to play while Bill is at a meeting. He won't be interested in it, and I have mixed feelings about it myself. I am watching it on the urging no, nagging of a co-worker, a young woman who is a social worker and the mother of two middle school age girls. Well, no problem now. While I was trying to turn down the volume, I inadvertently hit some unknown key and turned the screen off. Haven't a clue what I did or what to do about it. So, you have both my eyes and ears...but no topic. The movie she so determinedly wants me to watch is called Jesus Camp, and it is a frightening portrayal of the rise of dogmatic, fundamental religion in our country. I only saw the first few minutes, and already I'm alarmed, although I hear the same thing on the radio and among staff members and other groups of people every day. I will reserve further comment until I have actually seen the movie. We have a new social worker today, a man I know slightly and think highly of. I know he's had a private counseling practice and has been working for an agency dealing with children. As he questioned me today about the chaplain's role in hospice, he volunteered his own religious preference. "I'm a deacon," he said, "of baseball. My dad got me going to that church when I was young, and it's been my preference ever since." He went on to say that he also belongs to a meditation group of the Buddhist persuasion. He will be a very interesting addition to our mix. The other two social workers are a liberal Methodist and a fundamental Adventist. Nothing like good variety and balance. It's day 5 of the NaNoWriMo, and many of our favorite bloggers are hard at it. Several times today I found myself envying them, spending a couple of hours each day thinking of characters and having them step off the page and get on about their varying roles. A couple of characters in my head had a few words to say to me today, but, I couldn't keep listening to them and drive and carry on a conversation too. Pity. Here's my tip for the NaNoers: if your plot gets bogged down, have a power failure. All sorts of interesting things can happen in the dark, (like dripping wax on the carpet.)  We had a power outage for five hours a few weeks ago. Bill got home before me and had the few candles he could find lit, but he didn't have them secure on saucers or anything to catch the drip. The hand-poured beeswax candle that a friend made me had burnt through its side and was melting down the table. It's a star shaped column, very pretty but thinner in some places than others. Fire actually makes me nervous. I don't know how people walked around holding candles and seeing ahead of themselves AND not dripping wax all over. They certainly aren't as efficient as flashlights for casting beams of light; in fact, the bright flame sort of blinds me, at least makes it harder to see into the darkness. People probably DID drip wax all over, but then they didn't have wall-to-wall carpeting to contend with either. Well, I've babbled on enough. I'll go see what the rest of you are up to. 'Night. |
| Yesterday morning Bill got up at 3:30 A.M. to watch, on NASA TV, astronaut Scott Parazynski take the risky 7-hour space walk and stand on the distant end of the station's robotic arm to repair a hole in the solar array. Bill said it was history being made, and he didn't want to miss it. He got up in the night to watch his first space mission back in the 50's. By afternoon he was ready for a nap. (Bill, that is. Scott too, probably!) When he woke up, he said everybody ought to take two-hour naps, because, when you wake up, "fewer people want to kill you." I thought that was funny. Last evening, right through blogging time, we sat together on the love seat with the laptop and looked at blogs and videos about cruising to the Mexican Riviera. We'll be going right between his birthday and mine, at the end of this month. Woohoo! We're going sailing! Today was All Saints Day, and our assistant priest added to the sense of the communion of saints, as we refer to all those who have gone before us, by hanging full length silhouettes of people that were cut from screen. These shadowy figures were fastened to the walls, and the rectangles of screen they were cut from hung from the rafters. In her homily, Paula talked about the saints we knew, the people in our lives who taught us right from wrong, who taught us that God loves us, and all the other good lessons we learned that help us be the good people we are. That reminded me of two things in particular. First, how strange I thought it was when I first heard about "ancestor worship" in China and Japan. Maybe it's only the words that make it sound strange. We would never call it "worship," but maybe, in a good sense, we do the same. We don't do it enough though, don't appreciate what previous generations have done for us. The second thing I thought of as she preached was a trip I took to Haiti with my first husband, right before he left for VietNam. That's a blog in itself, but the part that came to mind was the donkey trip we took to the citadel in the mountains above Cape Haitian. Shortly after we got out of town, we came to a clearing where there was a little market. All the vendors were following us and calling out to us, trying to sell us their wares-- their straw hats and donkey bags. One woman was far more persistent than the others, walking alongside us and calling out, "Remember me! Remember me!" It worked. I've never forgotten her. I still have the donkey bag too. When I visited Washington D.C. for the first time, we toured the city and Arlington Cemetery. Everywhere we looked were statues and plaques, gravestones, and the Wall of names of casualties of soldiers in the Viet Nam war. Everywhere, everywhere, names called out to me: "Remember me! Remember me!" |
| I wish I had a good excuse why I not only didn't get back to finish a blog on Halloween, but also missed day one of the month of November. Sigh. Sometimes, when I'm running late for work, I think of all sorts of reasons why it's happened again. The phone rang. I spilled juice all down my shirt and had to go change. I had to stop for gas before I left town because I knew I'd be heading up north later in the day. I forgot my wallet, notebook, gym bag, cell phone, shoes. I left the dog inside, and had to go back to let him out. Not very creative, are they? But all are plausible. I have to scold myself as they come so easily to mind that actually making use of any of them would, plausible or not, be lying. Actually, last night Bill and I got busy looking up cruises and forgot the time. Ho-hum. This weekend I promise to get his outgrown, too large clothes out of the closet, washed, dried, and packed away in a suitcase to give to Goodwill. I also promise to get the summer clothes I took out of my drawers put away, separating out the things I might want to take on a cruise. I'd like to promise that we'll start painting the living room, but it probably wouldn't happen and I'd have to make excuses. Congratulations to all of you courageous Nano-ers. I'll be thinking about you. Does the fact that so many of you will be preoccupied with nano give the rest of the bloggers an added responsibility to keep our pages going? |
I promise not to write anything about funerals or politics today, but I will try to come up with something later. Happy Halloween.  |
| There are many ways to accomplish the same thing. It’s a sign of maturity to recognize this and mentally to allow that other people may be as ‘right’ as we are. On one of my recent two-funeral days, I left a service for one of our patients who belonged to a very evangelistic church in order to attend a service in my own church for another patient, this time a friend. As I started to describe the contrast, the pastor asked if the first service had provided any place for worship. We, in our denomination, do tend to be snobs about worship. We revel in ancient prayers and stately hymns, eloquent words of invitation and forgiveness. In the English tradition we came from, we go about the business of worship “decently and in good order.” I thought about the priest’s comment, and concluded that even the evangelical service had moments of worship, even though they were unlike ours. As a slide show flickered on a screen, showing pictures of the deceased at various ages and circumstances, the music was a song, unfamiliar to me, but uplifting in tune, a praise song. I’m sure that people would identify that music as worshipful. During the many testimonies about the woman’s life, the regular congregation kept up a murmuring assent, not unlike the hallelujahs heard in a black church. Over and over again, people said, “Yes, Jesus,” or “Praise you, Jesus,” or “Amen.” They were relating the parts of her life to blessings they had received from knowing her, or blessings that God had put shown forth in her life. Now, if I haven’t lost my non-religious readers yet, I want to make a connection for them as well. No, I don’t think a secular funeral has elements of worship per se. I do think it recognizes the—for lack of a better word—holy moments/aspects of a persons life. I think that even non-religious people recognize that some events are extraordinary, that they transcend the mundane, and they feel awe, or joy, or thankfulness. The feelings don’t have to be aimed at a Higher Being. Awe is awe. Joy is joy. Thankfulness is thankfulness. And grief is grief. No matter what a person believes about another life after this one, another chance to see the beloved, their death is a loss. The natural reaction to loss is grief. We say that our funeral, or memorial service, is a “celebration of the life of” whoever the person was. We distinguish our services from the maudlin sharing of all the friends in public that exemplifies the fundamentalist and secular services. We keep ours “hopeful” and “positive.“ By contrast, a friend of mine, who has nothing positive to say about churches anyway, considers our service sterile and cold. There’s an actual website whose motto is something like, “Put the Fun Back in Funerals.” It gives advice and suggestions for secular funerals. An example is to hold a ceremony for a golfer at the 9th hole and give out golf balls imprinted with the name of the deceased. I think that’s better than no service, and better than many. What do you think? |
| I am generally not a very political person. I tend to disbelieve all exclusive claims of which party or candidate represents truth, freedom and the American way. My husband, and my former husband as well, are VERY Republican, so that is the side I hear most often. The latter, who did a stint protecting the Arizona border from illegal traffic back in the '70's, sent me this. I can't imagine why it is an issue, let alone why anyone would vote for it. What am I not noticing here? Why would this be a good idea, to give illegal aliens Social Security benefits? Proposed Social Security Change For 2008 Now, the following senators voted to give illegal aliens Social Security benefits. They are grouped by home state. If a state is not listed, there was no voting representative. Alaska: Stevens (R) Arizona : McCain (R) Arkansas : Lincoln (D) Pryor (D) California : Boxer(D) Feinstein(D) Colorado : Salazar(D) Connecticut : Dodd(D) Lieberman(D) Delaware : Biden (D) Carper(D) Florida : Martinez(R) Hawaii : Akaka (D) Inouye(D) Illinois : Durbin(D) Obama(D) Indiana : Bayh (D) Lugar (R) Iowa: Harkin(D) Kansas : Brownback(R) Louisiana : Landrieu (D) Maryland : Mikulski(D) Sarbanes(D) Massachusetts : Kennedy D) Kerry(D) Montana : Baucus(D) Nebraska : Hagel(R) Nevada : Reid(D) New Jersey : Lautenberg(D) Menendez (D) New Mexico : Bingaman(D) New York : Clinton (D) Schumer(D) North Dakota : Dorgan(D) Ohio : DeWine(R) Voinovich(R) Oregon : Wyden (D) Pennsylvania : Specter(R) Rhode Island : Chafee (R) Reed(D) South Carolina : Graham(R) South Dakota: Johnson(D) Vermont : Jeffords (I) Leahy (D) Washington : Cantwell (D) Murray(D) West Virginia : Rockefeller(D), by Not Voting Wisconsin : Feingold (D) Kohl (D) IT DOESN'T MATTER IF YOU ARE REPUBLICAN OR DEMOCRAT! KEEP IT GOING!!!! 2008 Election Issue!! GET A BILL STARTED TO PLACE ALL POLITICIANS ON SOC. SEC. This must be an issue in '2008' Please! Keep it going. ---------------------------------- SOCIAL SECURITY: Perhaps we are asking the wrong questions during election years. Our Senators and Congresswomen do not pay into Social Security and, of course, they do not collect from it. You see, Social Security benefits were not suitable for persons of their rare elevation in society. They felt they should have a special plan for themselves. So, many years ago they voted in their own benefit plan. In more recent years, no congressperson has felt the need to change it. After all, it is a great plan. For all practical purposes their plan works like this: When they retire, they continue to draw the same pay until they die. Except it may increase from time to time for cost of living adjustments.. For example, Senator Byrd and Congressman White and their wives may expect to draw $7,800,000.00 (that's Seven Million, Eight-Hundred Thousand Dollars), with their wives drawing $275, 000.00 during the last years of their lives. This is calculated on an average life span for each of those two Dignitaries. Younger Dignitaries who retire at an early age, will receive much more during the rest of their lives. Their cost for this excellent plan is $0.00. N ADA..! ZILCH... This little perk they voted for themselves is free to them. You and I pick up the tab for this plan. The funds for this fine retirement plan come directly from the General Funds; 'OUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK '! From our own Social Security Plan, which you and I pay (or have paid) into, every payday until we retire (which amount is matched by our employer). We can expect to get an average of $1,000 per month after retirement. Or, in other words, we would have to collect our average of $1,000 monthly benefits for 68 years and one (1) month to equal Senator Bill Brad ley's benefits! Social Security could be very good if only one small change were made. That change would be to: Jerk the Golden Fleece Retirement Plan from under the Senators and Congressmen. Put them into the Social Security plan with the rest of us Then sit back..... And see how fast they would fix it. And now, normal apolitical comments will resume. Sorry folks. |
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I love your poem. It brought back many memories