The premise of the book is to teach the reader survival signals and how to trust their "gut" rather than making excuses for uncomfortable moves by potential dates, strangers, disgruntled employees, etc.

De Becker divides his chapters into distinct areas of possible threats. For example, chapter 10 deals exclusively with domestic violence whereas chapter 11 deals with date stalking. He even has a chapter on violent children. He deals with attacks against public figures in one chapter, how to deal with overly persistent people in chapter 8, violence in the workplace in chapter 9 and dangers from stranger contacts in chapter 5.


For example, how many of is women hold our key in our hand ready to poke someone if they get too close, but then allow a stranger to guilt us into letting him "help" us get a bag of groceries in our car because it would be rude to tell him no, even if he did seem a little too eager and wouldn't take your first "no" for an answer. DeBecker gives real examples of clients he has helped in each chapter.

This book should be mandatory reading for high school students, bosses, women, maybe even middle schoolers (some chapters selected by parents).

This book is not the same as your grandmother saying "be careful" and is not meant to make you afraid of your own shadow. Instead, he shows the science of intuition and prediction. He helps the reader weed through empty threats and rumors of what to watch for and focuses on real statistical probabilities so we can learn to watch, and listen, for the right things and trust our instincts.

I wanted to call all the women in my family and tell them to read it. I have also just bought three copies to keep in my office to give away to clients and told a friend about it. She also ordered several for her daughter and other friends.

I felt empowered and respected for my own instinct. I am from the South and there is a code of "manners" that, though great for eating dinner, they could kill us if used to deny our own insticts about someone. We all justify someone's actions by saying they were just nervous or having a bad day or maybe just being a "gentleman". De Becker shows in this book where this behavior is could get us in an abusive relationship, robbed, or worse.

De Becker has some excellent information on his web sites and also has a new version just out (for 13.99)of this book. Not only is this a good informative read if you read it straight through, the way he does the chapters, you can use it for reference also. If you are an employer, and you have fired someone who has made threats, you can just read that chapter over again for suggestions to keep your office and yourself safe.

It could save your life or that of your family or friends. For the price (7.99 or less if bought used), you can buy several copies and give them away to mothers, sisters, daughters, friends, employees, clients (if in social work/psychology field or domestic abuse field).

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Created Oct 27, 2007 at 2:59pm • Submit your own review...