This is Lia's story. Lia is an eighteen-year-old suffering from anorexia and psychosis and depression. They are all inter-related, so I'm not sure they can be separtated into those separate categories.

Lia used to be best friends with Cassie, a girl who suffered from bulimia. They had been best friends since age nine, and they had made this kind of pact between themselves that they would be the thinnest girls in the school.

The story begins with Lia learning that Cassie has died in a grubby motel room, all alone. Cassie called her the night she died, but Lia didn't pick up because she was angry with her. This haunts Lia (literally). She sees, hears, feels Cassie everywhere and is plagued with guilt.

This book is intense. It's probably the best depiction of eating disorders I've ever read. For the first part of the book, I didn't like Lia at all. No. More than that. She comes across as a spoilt rich kid who whines about nasty people are simply because they love her and try to help. She's not nice at all. But, that is actually an accurate portrayal of what it's like to have an eating disorder. You have to be selfish and self-centred to make it work. And this poor girl, Lia, is so ill. The family's frustration came across clearly.

Lia ventures to the motel where Cassie died. She has to see where her friend took her last breath. Here, she meets Elijah, who works there, and they strike up a sort-of friendship. Sort of. He seems to be a good guy, and it is him she goes to when she has nowhere left to go. But he doesn't do the right thing. I won't elaborate.

I think loved ones of people with eating disorders might benefit from reading this because it gives a clear insight into how people with these illnesses think. At the same time, they may find it too triggering.

Emma. Lia's little sister is adorable. She is a ray of sunshine in an otherwise dark book. Through her darkest moments, Lia loves Emma. That's the one relationship she never stops cherishing.

Elijah. Right until the end, I would have put his name under the things I liked. And then, the end came.

I thought the book ended too easily. The first 85%, Lia is seriously ill and bitchy and nasty. Then, suddenly, an epiphany. She's in treatment and has a completely different outlook and attitude. There was enough, for me, about recovery and how hard it is.

Take a break and sit quietly for a while.

Angry. Frightened. It brought back some unpleasant memories.

Laurie Halse Anderson.

It might help sufferers and their families to understand what is happening, and also provide some comfort that it is beatable.

It is triggering. But that's because it's so well written.

I read the Kindle version of this book. I've had it in my library for a year or so, but I've not been sure I would read it. However, my book club is covering disabilities and mental illness this month. So this book fits perfectly. It was tough going, that's for sure, and I wouldn't recommend it for anyone who is triggered by eating disorders or depression and psychosis. Here is the thing: my disordered eating was over twenty plus years ago, but as I was reading Lia's thoughts about food, I started to work out calories and ways I could cut back, even, wondering if I could could cut down to 500 calories prepay. Which is very unhealthy. I didn't realise I could still be triggered. So, I would urge you not to read this if you are vulnerable to the subject.

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Created Feb 29, 2024 at 4:54am • Submit your own review...