A Tender Trip on Earth

My time is near. I can feel the end beckoning my soul to come away from my body. However, I force my soul to obey me for a little while longer, in order to share this last untold story of my life. I have told many people throughout my younger years, before this incident, many things about my life. But what happened afterwards, the event that has changed my life remained between me and only two others. It is this story that I must now share that has torn my spirit to pieces. This story will give proof that the one-god has done wrong. He is not omni-benevolent as his followers believe he is. And he, as we all do, has a nature of evil buried deep inside.


I hope because I refuse to pray, that someone of my human nature will happen upon this document. I care not if this person is able to read it or believe the words I have written. I nevertheless, hope that the person will take it with them and share it with another who is able to read and fully understand my words. What has happened to me must never be forgotten. What I have seen and learned must be made known and not lost like a grain of sand fallen in the way of a swift and rolling ocean wave. She must not be forgotten. The fact that those of the divine natures exist is truly astounding. And the fact that some live amongst us mortal humans is almost unbelievable and all must be made known to that fact.

The shadows that are cast out by the light of my candle grow tall and restless. They wish to bring me unto them and live eternally on the shadowy dark side of the dead. Yet I elude them. But I can only keep this cat and mouse game going for so long before I tire and fall helplessly to their wishes. The candle continues to burn all sight away. I feel that I can only remain free until the wick reaches the end of its fiery journey through the wax. But before I leave this stage, I must tell the tale of a long journey of mine. It was a journey that first paralleled and then became entwined with the journey of a Diva. This journey took us through our souls and through time itself. I have also been forced to question all that I once had faith in. I still am unsure of what I believe with all my heart. And because of this, I fear this last journey that I will be taking once my body has breathed its last breath. And I also fear for the Diva. I will not know what will come of her and if she will be able to remain safe. The shadows move swift. It is time, and I share this story.

This tale began a few years after I entered adulthood. For years prior, I had been apprenticed by the blacksmith of my village. Through him I learned the intricate art of forging metal into whatever object the paying customer wished. More often than not, we forged weapons and armor for soldiers, sometimes for nobles. I spent years of my childhood and my sweat and blood, forced to perfect my abilities in forging materials. Eventually I was conditioned to enjoy this profession. I had realized it was what I would be doing for the rest of my life, so I should learn to enjoy it. There was no choice in professions in that time. And it was a better job than being enslaved to the land of a nobleman.

On first impression, the master blacksmith appeared to be a kind and loving man. He was a bit strict in my teachings, but it was understandable for him to be so, in order for me to learn properly the ways of a smithy. He treated all paying customers as if each one were a god. And he treated me fairly. He never raised a belt to me if I ruined a project, as I heard so many tales of other masters who did so and much worse to their apprentices. He believed it was punishment enough for me to have to start over and then be confronted by the customer when their item was received late. However, my view of whom the master blacksmith really was changed when a certain individual entered the shop.

When we were not slaving away in the forge to create an item for a special customer, we were created merchandise to put on display in the outer shop. There was only a young man browsing around as I set out three bronze shields that were cool to the touch. As I walked back to the forge, I spotted the young man attempt to steal one of the shields. I did not need to tell the master blacksmith, for he was up front as well and saw it. Under all circumstances, it was required to report the thief to the local constable to await a trial for his crime. But my master did not see it that way. I held the perpetrator, to keep him from running off. I was shocked as I watch the master blacksmith pick up a newly made broadsword and was stunned as he sliced the young man’s head off as I stood there holding him. I remember being struck with horror at what had happened. I could not believe my eyes and as I felt the man’s blood upon my face, I knew it was true. I grimaced and pushed the body away and it slumped to the ground. As I wiped the blood off of my face, the master blacksmith pointed the sword at me and told me to never mention this to anyone, lest he does the same to me. It was in that instant that I lost all previously gained respect for this man. And it was with this act that I decided to run away.

That night I packed up everything I could carry. I had taken only items I would need for this journey. Without waking the master blacksmith, I had set off for the forest behind the shop. If I were unlucky enough to have awakened him, he would have slaughtered me like a wolf would to a lamb. Not only did I run away from my apprenticeship, but I was left with stolen items from the shop. I had taken a short sword I had made earlier that day. I had no destination in mind, but I had to get away from this vile man. When I had entered the forest, I noticed the newly created grave where the master blacksmith buried the young man. I shook my head in disgust and continued on, shedding one tear for the lost life. I did not look back. I knew I could never return to this village. To my home.

The night became day and the day eventually returned to night. As I walked each step, I smiled and wondered what the master blacksmith was thinking now that I had turned up missing. Days passed by and turned into weeks. I taught myself how to live off of the land. There was no other to hunt or set up a camp for me. I was now in a new land where only one law existed: Survival of the fittest. I had left my blacksmith apprentice title behind. I have now entered the ranks of a nomad, one who lives off the land to survive and roams at all times. After nearly three weeks of wandering to no place in particular, night approached and I set up camp as I had done every night. I had hunted earlier in the day and was not hungry. I made a fire to shield a frigid breeze from me and to keep me company. The fire helped slightly, but I still covered myself with my cloak and a blanket I brought with me. These items did not help stave off the breeze much better. As the fire roared in competition with the powers of the air, I looked up at the night sky. I saw nothing but pitch black nothingness. The stars and the moon were covered by dark and heavy clouds which blocked all light, like an eclipse of the sun.

It was on this night that I had dreamed a prophetic dream. I envisioned an ancient and lost burial ground in between two ominous forests. In my dream I walked past many chipped and decayed headstones until I reached one in particular. The headstone was in the shape of a horizontal rectangle. There was writing upon the stone. It read; Aria of the Damned. Below the name and to the left was a date of birth, though the actual date was no longer legible. To the right of that was another date. It read as a “Date of Fall” and not Date of Death, like so many others. Unlike the other date, this one was readable. The “Date of Fall” was nearly two years ago. It was then when I heard the crack of a stick behind me. At that moment I felt like a bitter cold hand was grasping my heart. I spun around but did not see anyone. But I could feel the presence of an entity.

I had awakened back to the night, soaked to the bone. It had started to rain while I was asleep. It was still raining. My cloak and blanket let the water soak right through me. The water had teamed up with the wind to put the fire out. I put my blanket over my head for some shielding and attempted to sleep. However, I did not sleep at all during that night.

The next morning began a day that would be drastically different from all the other previous days on this monotonous journey through the wilderness. I changed out of my soaking clothes and into some as fresh as the warm and sunny day that had appeared before me. The rainfall seemed to cleanse the Earth from all of the evils that it had to endure. After I changed and gathered up all I had, I set off once more. It had taken only two more hours to reach the end of this forest that seemed to be of infinite length. My heart beat as loud as the thumping of a bass drum as I stepped out of the forest and into a desolate cemetery in between two forests.

The border of trees kept a damp and rolling fog within the grounds. Even though the sun was shining, it did not enter this place. This place was dark. It was as if someone had flung a shade over a lamp. I walked through the cemetery as I had in my dream, until I saw her. Three quarters of the way across the burial ground, I saw the marker from my dream. The burial stone for Aria of the Damned. Leaning over the back of the stone with her head in her hands crying, was a Diva. She looked up as I approached her, and I was able to get a good look at her. I stood there is stunned silence, quieted by her divine essence. The Diva’s tear soaked face was soft and delicate. She had the eyes of emeralds and long golden hair. Upon her back were great white wings and around her neck was a heavy black chain. The chain made her hang her head, even as she looked at me, as if it weighed her down. I asked her if she was okay, she shook her head as tears continued to descend from her eyes. I looked at her and asked if she was named Aria.

She said that she was. Her voice was soft but had a musical quality to it that her name would suggest. I had fallen in love with that voice in that instant. She stood up, turned around, and headed into the direction I would be going into the other forest. I followed her. I asked her if there was anything I could do to help her. She did not respond. I noticed through her face that her soul was filled with torment. I asked her if she was truly a Diva. Aria told me that she used to be a Diva. But now she was nothing more than one of the Fallen who are doomed to wander, wretched, until the end of the Earth, and then remain in solitary seclusion for eternity. I asked the Diva what had happened to put her in such a forbidden state. She turned to me and rose up her hand in a halting manner. She said that she did not know who I was and would not reveal this personal information to any stranger. Then she requested that I just leave her be.

I insisted that she must now tell me. And she asked me why I deserved to know of such a thing. I told her that she did in fact reveal personal information to a stranger. Arias demanded for proof of such an example and I told her about what she did reveal to me earlier in our conversation, even though I am a stranger to her. She looked at me long and hard in thought. And she just shook her head and told me that I could not understand because I was nothing but a human, one of his precious humans. I told her that she would feel better to get this torment off of her chest. She agreed with me under one condition. She asked that I would leave her forever to walk alone. I gave my reply with a nod.

She shared with me that she once lived among the other Divas in Paradise. But in truth, Paradise is nowhere close to its human depiction. She claimed that Yahweh did not possess all the characteristics that humans attributed to him. His main flaw would be his lack of omni-benevolence. Aria said that his lack of that one trait is due to his selfishness. He truly does not concern himself with the feelings of anyone other than his own, contrary to what man believes. As long as he has his mindless slaves, all his desires can be satisfied. I can honestly say that this was nothing short of a shock to me.

I asked Aria what had happened. She told me that she became sick of mindless worship. She wanted to express her own freewill like the humans, not hold it inside forever as the one-god would want. She took her concerns to Yahweh himself. He did not take her criticism very well at all. He told her to leave behind everything that she was thinking and forget it all. Her job was to serve him for eternity. If she falls from her rank once more, she would feel his wrath. But she would not be deterred by his words. Aria had taken a trip from Paradise to see exactly what has happened. In tomes written by humans, she noted the hideous amount of men, women, and children who had perished by the acts of Yahweh, through warfare in his name or disasters. She became disgusted and could not bear to see any of this pain and death caused by him for any longer. Aria journeyed back to heaven in order to confront Yahweh with what she had discovered. But it was he who confronted her as soon as she crossed through the gates. He viewed everything she had learned from his throne and was ready to punish her. He took her name and cast damnation upon it for eternity. He revoked her angelic abilities as well as her golden halo. And he gave her the black chain that hung around her neck that contained the magnified torments of all before her and would keep adding up as each second went by. It was forged to weigh her down onto the Earth. She paused as if to think of whether to share any more information.

I asked Aria if there was anything else she wanted to share. She said that she was finished. She had fulfilled her part of the bargain, and it was now up to me that I came through with mine. She demanded I keep my promise and leave her alone. Before I left, I asked her if she would journey with me. I said that I was going in the same direction as she was. She refused, claiming that she did not want to risk a human. Yahweh was ever watching her and she could not bear to cause damnation to another. I would not be rid of her so easily no matter the promise I made. I told her not to concern herself with my future. I said that I wished to confront Yahweh when I reach the end of my life and demand his defense for what he had done to her. I would also make sure all hear about Yahweh’s true nature and that his omni-benevolence is nothing short of a lie. Aria began to plead with me, but I did not let her finish. I told her that she had suffered enough and that I would help comfort her as long as I was living upon this Earth. Aria smiled and I could see her radiance. It was of such unspeakable beauty that it broke the unseen barrier that shrouded this burial ground and the sun shone through and brought light and warmth upon us. She told me that I was very kind and then asked what I am called. I shared my name with her. And then she commented that my appearance was a miracle, because she had not smiled once since her fall from grace.

I let Aria know that she did not need Yahweh’s grace to be happy. And perhaps there is no grace to be had whatsoever. For if he was as selfish as Aria portrayed him, he would never share it with anyone, even his followers. Salvation may actually be an illusion. Or it may even be a lie, as Aria suggested. She came up to me and we embraced for a few moments. Although those moments felt like hours. It was such a wonderful experience to be embraced with a Diva, be she fallen or not. Her touch was more powerful than anything I had ever felt or would ever feel. There are no words known to man for me to truly express the feelings coursing through my body. A part of me loved her, and a part of me felt such sorrow for her. I knew from then on I would do anything I could to help protect her. Even if I had to fight Yahweh himself.

We wandered through the forest and then the grasslands that followed for a few weeks. These weeks together seemed like infinity. They would never end. We talked much on our journey. I realized that a part of her began to love me as well. It may not have been on the same level as my love. But love between a Diva and a human was completely unheard of, at least in mythological stories. We both knew of our love and were content in that. But one day Aria’s seeming contentedness turned suddenly to despair. I asked her what was wrong. She let me know that Yahweh was watching us directly. He now knows of me. She said that he will come to punish us. She ended with saying that her punishment would be greater. Yahweh would never let her die.

I drew Aria close to me and we embrace as she began to cry. After a few moments we looked into each other’s eyes. My eyes then moved down to the black chain around her neck. I knew what to do. I pulled the chain up from around her neck and then placed it around my own. It was the only way I could fully remove her pain. I screamed in agony and dropped to the ground. I now carried all the torments of the world around my neck. It was painful. Aria continued to cry as she begged for me to give the chain back to her. But I refused her. She had given the gift of love to me, something I had never felt in my life and did not believe I would ever have after I left the master blacksmith. I could no longer go on watching her sorrow day after day. This was what I had to do. There was no other way.

After I was able to stand and force myself to bear this vile torment, we eventually continued on through the grasslands and into another forest. We walked and talked for ages. It may have only been a few days; perhaps it was the torment that weighed me down that made it appear to be hundreds of years that flew by. This journey of pain did not seem like it would end. I could not bear this. I did not know how Aria could survive so long. Eventually we did reach the end of the forest. It was then when I knew how long the trip actually took. My feeling that hundreds of years went by may have been closer to the truth than I would have originally believed. It may have been Yahweh who sent us through the ages or perhaps it was a subconscious power that awoke in Aria after the punishment of torment was lifted from her. It was possibly a means of escape from Yahweh. The more I think about it, the more I believe of the later.

We exited the forest in the backyard of a one story house. It was a nice house, and the yard was beautiful. We walked past that. The front of the house was even more beautiful, clad with a cedar wood fronting. Then we approached a road. It was not made of clay or dirt, but some sort of hard substance. And up and down the road moved bizarre looking carriages. They moved without horses. I had never seen something like that in all my life. We crossed the street to an abandoned two story house. We went inside. It was then that I had felt the dread of an imminent separation. Perhaps this was made more obvious by that horrible unholy black chain. We walked up a staircase and I followed her into a room that would be her hideout for many years.

Unfortunately, my dread was correct. I had to leave. The black chain could be used as a way for Yahweh to locate us. It was at that moment of realization that I attempted to remove the chain. It would not come off. It was permanently seared to my very essence. This device was never designed to be worn by humans and had drained much of my being. Before I left Aria forever, I was able to gather a group of people who would be able to protect her. They were never too fond of Yahweh and had their own belief system. Once they met Aria, they got along splendidly with her and her with them. They put up a wonderful facade that would ensure neither man nor divine would know she was there. Early one morning, while she was asleep, I left Aria. I kissed her lightly on the cheek when I checked in on her for the last time. I slipped out of the house and walked across the road to the one story house. No one was home at the time and I slipped through an unlocked door and into the basement. I watched this family from across the street. It was a family of four. Everything seemed normal, except for the boy. He appeared to be about my age and seemed to be suffering the entire world’s torment as well. I have watched him from the forest sometimes staring at the home that houses Aria. It seems that a part of him knows that something divine is hiding over there. Perhaps there is someone who could change his life, as she did to mine. I will leave this manuscript in hiding, here in the basement. I am sure he will be drawn to it, as he seems to be drawn to the house across the street. He will be the first to know of the Divine and the true nature of Yahweh. So I say, share the nature of Yahweh and the Divine. But do not share the location. Burn the manuscript once you find it and read it. Do not let anyone know where she hides, lest you destroy all love and hope.



The wick of my candle is nearly burnt out. The shadows have ceased their celebration for the moment. They now just stand in place, waiting. They stare at me very hard. I know that Yahweh is now awaiting my arrival. Once the wick completely burns out I will be sent to Yahweh to be judged for my crimes against his will. I also know he will demand the location of Aria. I will endure endless torture if I must, to protect her. I will refuse him and endure any hell that he will put me through. I know that whatever happens, I must exist through an eternal separation from Aria, the only love from my entire life. He can divide us eternally apart, but he will not be able to revoke my memories.