Elana

Elana looked up into the slate grey sky, watching the snow fall down around her. Closing her eyes she felt the snow fall on them and melt and mingle with fresh tears. Was it yesterday? Who could really count the days? Her mother was gone and so was the hope of ever finding out who her father was.

Why was she crying? Why was she so weak? Why did it hurt so bad but feel so much like nothing? Faintly, she realized it was how her bare feet felt in the ankle deep snow—it stung but at the same time she couldn’t feel it at all.

She was useless and clumsy, unable to do anything without help. Wiping her face with her rough brown sleeve, she looked around her. Could she live? Did it matter?

Life isn’t fair, she decided, sitting down on a park bench. Some people had wealth beyond what they could comprehend and nothing ever bad happened to them and at the same time there were people with nothing, like her, no friends or family or… Shaking her head she let the silence overwhelm her.

She wanted to scream and to stomp, to kill and to cry. Why was it happening to her? Why had her mother suddenly fallen so ill? Had her lack of faith caused it?

A Goddess, she thought, wouldn’t let people be miserable or for people to die and leave people like me behind. A Goddess stops these things! These things shouldn’t happen to good people. At that time she hadn’t had the strength or knowledge to admit that it happened to anyone and everyone; she hadn’t been willing to believe that life couldn’t be fair; after all, she had been seven years old, happily working with her mother for a nobleman in the house of Berano, a man who had owned several farms and shops in the area and could house many of his own servants.

Pulling her legs onto the bench and hugging them tightly to her chest, Elana fell asleep.



The next morning she woke in a cold, damp room that wasn’t much more than a metal closet with an old and tattered mattress on the floor. Standing abruptly to her feet, Elana was about to scream alarm when the world began to swirl around her. Sitting back down, she cradled her head in her hands and rocked back and forth. Soon, the world was as it should be and she stood up less quickly than before. Looking around her, she determined that the situation was bleak. Without light she wouldn’t be able to tell how to get out or where to bang on the door.

Frantically, she wondered if there even was a door or if she had been dropped into a pit the night before. Looking up into the darkness she deemed it impossible and began to feel around the tomb’s walls. Why, she thought, does it all feel the same?! Isn’t there something that will open the door…?

What seemed like days or weeks were actually only hours, but they were enough to set Elana back into tears. Was she insane? It wasn’t very logical to kidnap a girl and do this to her, after all, wouldn’t they do something more gruesome? What’s more gruesome than a dirty, dark old jail cell, the other part of her asked?

Finally having worn herself out worrying, Elana went to bed that night on the beaten up mattress.



In her dream Elana was in a place completely black but ahead of her was a faint pink light. Walking closer, it seemed that it was always just out of her grasp. Should she keep going? What would she gain by catching it? Every step seemed to get her further and further away from it but yet… why did she want it so much?

Was it even far away from her? Was it actually here where she was standing? Did she have to run to go there or was ‘there’ what she made it?

Closing her eyes she thought of what it was to be her; blond hair cut to her shoulders, scrapes on her knees from always tripping over, laughing at corny jokes, and clumsily saying sorry after making a mistake. With her hand she reached out and opened her palm towards the light, ready to grasp it—to embrace it.



It was a while before she awoke again and when she did she noticed that there was light seeping in the windows. Faintly, she knew there was something wrong with that, though only half of her wanted to wake up and realize it. Wait, she thought frantically, there aren’t any windows in…

“Huh?!” she gasped, looking down at her hands that were emitting a strange pink light. “How did… when did…?”

“So you’re ready…” Elana whipped around as fast as she could to see no one there. “I’m sorry, did I frighten you?” Elana didn’t want to admit that indeed, this female voice had scared her.

“Who… who are you?!” Getting off the mattress, she stood up and began surveying the room. “Show yourself!”

“Why, my dear, there’s nothing to show! But, tell me, how are you? Is anything… different!?” The voice was cruel and weird, like it didn’t quite belong to anyone human. Elana didn’t want to think about what the voice might be, so she continued to talk.

“So it was you! What did you do to my hands?! Change them back!” she growled, continuing to turn as she didn’t know where to direct her voice. “Only cowards hide their face when they know they’ve something to hide!”

“I didn’t do anything, you brat! Now get out of my domain before I chop you into itty bitty pieces and eat you!”

“How do I even know you can!? And how would I get out if I wanted to!” Elana stared angrily at a brick in the wall, marking it as the place that represented the voice.

A hiss filled the room and sent a cold shiver down her spine but as quickly as it had come, it was gone again. Then a loud crash to her right rang in her ears and made her jump in shock.

There was a door in the wall, or, more accurately, a hole. Where it came from and how it got there, she didn’t know, all she did know was that she had to leave right now.

“Before that… thing gets me,” she said determinedly, furrowing her brows and marching out of the dank room.



She was many hours winding in and out of different passageways and going up and down stairs to no avail. What was this place? Who created this monstrosity? Was it the creature? Not wanting to dwell on it, she continued down the hall she was presently in.

The light from her hands was still glowing, but not as strong. Yawning, she wondered how long she had been walking in this horrible, filthy, stinking, dirty… place. With a muffled yell she fell to floor, knocking the wind and light out of her. Now in complete darkness, Elana felt around the floor, looking for whatever had tripped her.

‘It better not be my own feet!’ she thought to herself, crawling around the floor like someone looking for their glasses.

“Aa!” she cried, feeling blood fall from her hand and drip to the ground. Gingerly touching the blade she found the hilt of a small dagger. Tightly grabbing it and getting to her feet, Elana let out a sigh of relief and a breath she didn’t know she had been holding. The dagger felt like it had been made for her, though she knew that wasn’t the case. Who had left it there before her? Regardless, it was good fortune that allowed her to find it now, in this place full of unanticipated dangers.

Elana was feeling more confident now that she had something with which to defend herself and if push came to shove she would feel bold, handling something so keen-edged and deadly. Focusing again on whom she was and what she wanted, Elana called to the light again. When she finally opened her eyes again the light was not only surrounding her hands but her whole body as well.

Now that there was more light with which to see, Elana was finally able to have a good look at where she was. In such an immense and large hall she felt small and insignificant, like a single star in the whole entire galaxy.

Elana jumped and dropped the dagger onto the cold cobblestone floor as a low growling sound filled the hall. Hurriedly, picking the dagger up again, she braced herself for an attack.

But nothing came. Elana waited for a long time, standing there, ready to be beaten down by a horrible monster, but nothing came. And nothing would come, she discovered after an hour of waiting.

Releasing a breath of relief, Elana continued to walk. Looking around her as she went, she wondered how she had gotten into such a predicament. Hearing a noise behind her, she whipped around, dagger at the ready. What she saw was far from the monster she had expected.

Standing in front of her was a small girl, probably of the age of nine, doubled over and huffing in an attempt to regain her breath. The girl’s blue eyes looked up in a sidelong glance, pitying but not afraid. “My name is Hitoshi,” she said, “I saw you from the distance and I thought... I thought you were a door.” The girl Hitoshi stood to her full length and looked down at Elana with all the pride of a noblewoman. But, with a second look, Elana discovered that this girl was a noble. She wore a long powder blue dress with gold and pink hanging in all the right places and frilly cuffs around her sleeves and collar, she was the daughter of a Baron. “I woke up down here and then... well I demanded to be let out. How would I know that in such a place being ‘let out’ is the last thing one would want? But tell me, who are you? Why is it that you roam down here in such... apparel? I am sure they kidnapped me for the ransom they could get from my father but... you seem to be little more than a peasant girl!”

Elana was shocked, seeing this girl talk as if she were on the streets and Elana were nothing more than, indeed, a peasant girl. Angrily, she thought that this girl would not be as brave if there were no light to protect them from the darkness around them. “Who do you think you are? I am the one holding the dagger and supplying the light! I’m sure you still sleep with the candle lit!”

The girl named Hitoshi looked indignant. “Why I do not! How dare you assume you know me?!”

“How dare you assume you know me!” Elana yelled, releasing the light and throwing the two girls into total darkness.

“Wh… what did you do? I demand you… you ‘undo’ it right now!” Hitoshi screeched, grabbing onto Elana’s arms and digging her nails into them.

Frightened by the other girl’s outbreak, Elana complied and released the light again. Sighing, Elana turned to look at her again. “Are you afraid of the dark?”

Hitoshi looked away blushing. “Yes, if you must know, yes, I am. I’ve been frightened of the dark for the longest time now. Please… please don’t turn off the light again! I’m sorry…”

Elana knew when she was beaten and, regardless, if this girl was somewhat rude and mean… she knew that she would have to be nice. Elana was tired of being alone and she knew that Hitoshi probably was too. “Hitoshi?”

Hitoshi looked up brightly, glad to be of use. “Yes!”

“Do… do you know the way out?”

“…No.”

Both girls were quiet for a long time after that, simply walking for what seemed like miles. Finally, the silence ended when great rumbling sounds resonated from both their stomachs. Hitoshi blushed and coughed slightly, trying to mask her embarrassment, while Elana immediately considered the problem.

“We need to find food,” demanded Elana.

“And where will we find it?” chirped Hitoshi, but Elana silenced her with a glare.

And again, both girls went on in silence, for neither of them knew the answer to their questions.

“Who are you, anyway?” asked Elana, still walking.

Hitoshi stopped and looked down, a saddened expression on her face. “My name is Hitoshi Berano, heir to the Berano fortune…”

Elana turned around and scoffed, but she continued to walk, “What’s so bad with that?”

“I… I don’t have any friends…”

“Neither do I, but then, I don’t have money either!” Elana considered, turning back around and leaving Hitoshi behind.

Hitoshi noticed this and ran to catch up with her, and, when she was in step with her again, she said, “But you have a mother who loves you…”

Elana stopped dead in her tracks. Putting her hand up to her face she clenched her eyes tight and tried to force herself not to cry. Why was it so painful? Why couldn’t she be happy, like her mother had told her? Why did she doubt herself so much?

“Are… are you okay, little girl?” Hitoshi asked, gingerly touching Elana’s sleeves.

“Elana.”

“What?”

“My name… you asked my name, before… it’s Elana.”

After a long silence in which the only diversion was their footsteps pattering and echoing in the large hall, Elana spoke. “My mother died four days ago. I’ve been in here for two.”

Hitoshi gasped, and exclaimed, “I’m so sorry for you!”

“Sad.”

“What?”

“Be sad for me… I don’t want any pity.” Elana looked Hitoshi square in the eyes and in her own, there was a sort of empathy. Hitoshi looked at the other girl’s eyes and knew, in that moment, that she too, felt sadness and she too, was lonely and afraid.

Hitoshi smiled and said, “Okay… I’m so very… sad for you.”

Elana smiled too, and they held hands after that, and they walked for a long time.



“Did you hear that?” asked Hitoshi, looking around herself nervously.

“Hear what?”

“That… that noise! It’s like a grumbling, hissing noise!”

“I didn’t hear anything…,” Elana said, thinking Hitoshi had just heard her own stomach growl.

“I’m sure I heard something!”

“Like your stomach?” asked Elana, rolling her eyes.

“No! It’s like… like…” but Hitoshi didn’t continue, she just looked up in awe and fear.

“Hitoshi…?” Elana asked, looking over to the girl and following the direction of her gaze. Elana was barely able to choke the scream in her throat as she looked up in horror at the miscreation above them.

It was the blood red eyes the glared down at them and the continuos hissing and growling noises that was monstrous. As hard as Elana tried, she couldn’t find the body of the beast. It was as if the monster was just… darkness.

“Children…” Immediately Elana recognized the voice—it was the voice that had greeted her when she had woken up. Though now it was deeper and more clear, and it gripped her at her very core and shook her. Every breath she took came in like ice and every breath she released went out in a puff of white. “You realize you’ll never get out now, don’t you? The path is blocked, the door is locked and the body is unwilling to move.”

Tears streamed down both their cheeks but the girls still couldn’t move. The thing before them was death, horror, fear and darkness all in one being. It fed on the fear and darkness that inhabited its home and grew larger and stronger and more real.

Elana watched in horror as the darkness came closer to Hitoshi until it had her and it squeezed her. It tore her clothes to shreds and cut her hair; she screamed in agony and clawed at the invisible hand around her throat. Finally, the scream went dead and the hands clawing in fury dropped limply to their sides. With little effort, the darkness flicked her away.

Elana’s eyes went wide as she witnessed the death of her friend. Full of fury and a renewed bravery, she stood her ground, dagger ready.

The darkness laughed and sending chills down her spine. She braced herself for the first attack. Without much effort, the darkness made claws and swiped at Elana, throwing her to the ground and tearing at her skin. Getting back to her feet, Elana grunted. How could she attack something that wasn’t fully there?

Furrowing her brows, Elana charged at the unknown force and swiped angrily with the dagger, but to no avail. Again and again, she flew across the room and each time she became more bruised and sore. Soon, she was a bloody mess and could hardly stand, and, to her horror, the light around her began to flicker.

“N… no!” she managed to choke out, “N…”

But the force was already upon her and it was gripping her the way it had gripped Hitoshi. She clawed at it and screamed with all her might. She was drowning! Drowning in this darkness. The light was leaving her! She could hardly breath! Thinking again of the light, she tried to summon it to her. If this being was darkness couldn’t she conquer it with light?

Dropping her dagger and letting it fall helplessly to the floor Elana sucked in a large breath and tried to calm herself. Concentrating, she desperately thought of the Elana who Hitoshi had met, and the Elana who had been daughter to Erin. She was Elana, a child of the light.

“Stop!” she cried, and the sound echoed loudly throughout the halls and seemed to shake their very existence. Without warning, a bright light shone from her body and enveloped the two of them; Elana and Darkness.



Elana struggled to open her eyes and when she did, the world seemed to be too bright and too loud. She wondered if she was dead. If this was the place were souls went. No, she thought, it’s much too loud and annoying to be heaven…

Sitting up and cradling her legs to her chest, she looked around. And there she was, in the bleak grey and white streets of Ëarhear. The snow fell down around her but she didn’t feel as cold as she had before. She didn’t feel much of anything, actually.

Looking up into the sky, she let the snow fall down onto her eyes and mingle with the old tears. She knew a lot of things, now. Most importantly she knew that she couldn’t doubt herself. She also knew that she couldn’t be here. This wasn’t the place for her. It held too many memories—too much of her old self.

She had to be different now. She was different—she was older in a way. She couldn’t explain it and she knew in that moment that she could never truly return to the town where the snow always falls on sad days.

Getting up with a groan she realized that today was the day that her life both ended and began. She was Elana. She was a child of the light.