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I tried to stop, but I couldn’t. I took the bat and stood in a stance as though to hit a perfect pitch from a professional baseball pitcher. The bat then swung and hit his head and the crunch sounded off the mans skull as it was crushed, shattered like a coconut. The bat was raised again as a full forced swing bashed the skull again and mans body began to twitch violently. Jonesy should have thought twice before crossing me, fucker decided to try to lighten the bags of coke he was supposed to deliver to the Cartel. Now I had to figure a way of explaining to my customer why a full kilo is shorted by more than 10 grams. As if I trusted him enough not to check the merchandise.

Shit, now I have to clean this mess before my girl comes home, if she were to find out what I was doing she would leave me, not that I would care. I think I have come accustomed to have her as company; she is a good friend and listener. I don’t think I would want to have to try to go thru the whole new relationship crap all over again. Shit, that’s a lot of blood, man I wish I would have done this outside.

Well, at least no one will miss Jonesy… idiot was lucky I ever thought of having him help me with the business any way. Fucker was in a shit rut when I met him, all drunk and no where to go but the nearest alley to puke and come back to the same bar and get reloaded just to puke when he got full. Probably did him a favor, I can imagine his liver is probably as big as a cantaloupe. He did have his good qualities though, always was ready to take the fall whenever pigs came around looking and asking for information on the small Latino that was supposed to be running the drug deliveries in the neighborhood. He always seemed to cook some shit as story about some Samoan boss of his running the area.

Well now they can search for the Samoan who bashed his skull in. Ok, I have three hours to clean this shit up. Better quit standing around and start moving the body before the blood starts coming out of his ears.

As I start trying to move this body, I can remember the first time I was brought to such violence. My sister had a small kitten, white with blue eyes. I was playing with the kitten and small string, just dragging it and having the kitten chase it. Then I got bored with it and was looking at the kittens eyes. I don’t know what caused the kitten to react the way it did, but as I stared into its blues eyes, it decided to scratch me on my upper lip, the small claws slicing my lip open and the burn of the air as it hit the open flesh. I grab the kitten and take a shoelace from a pair of worn Converse high-tops. I double-knot a tie around its neck and the kitten thinks it’s a new toy. I carry the kitten in my arms wondering how I am going to make it pay for scratching me. Shit, this stings, so now I am outside in the back yard and start whirling the kitten above my head as though it was helicopter blades, it makes no sound, the lace must have tightened. I look up at the kitten and happen to notice some cable lines above me. So from helicopter blades to a cowboy’s lasso, now to see if I can hang this kitten off the lines. I let go the lace and up and over the lines it goes, and yes it drops enough to whirl over the cables and now the action begins. The kitten starts swinging and meowing and gurgling its last bit of air, swinging flailing violently in the air; I hope my sister isn’t around. Now there are cries coming from the kitten, and my sister is coming outside to see where the screams are coming from. Her wonder turns to horror as she sees her kitten flailing weakly, the screams now whimpers as her body stops flailing and is just swinging over us; me with a smile and my sister with tears running down her cheeks mouth agape. The swinging is slowing, no more life in the kitten, well so much for having nine lives, looks as though I took them all.

My sister punches the right side of my neck and she runs to get my father. Me, I take and get on my bike and disappear for a few hours, by the time I get home that night, my father is too tired to beat me, but my sister beats the shit out of me while trying to sleep, she muffles my cries with a pillow. Like that’s going to bring those nine lives back into that kitten.

Now, this fucking six foot six and a half inch piece of shit has to be dragged out to my car and stuffed into my trunk so I can figure out where the hell I am going to get rid of him. Well, I will call the cops and report my car stolen and then I will drive my car somewhere where the desert meets the edge of the world. By then it will be night fall and I can walk the cool night back to the city and head to work while old Jonesy cooks and swells up nice in the desert. I can hook up with a few fiends, get them off and have them as my alibi should the car be found by the police they can say that I was with them, and of course the car will have my prints, shit its my car. Whoever “stole it” must have knew Jonesy and was pissed because he didn’t pay his debts in time and my car just “happened” to be the perfect car to stuff a body in.

Well, here I am walking around in the light of the moon kicking up desert dirt from my shoes. Gives me some time to think, how to cover that kilo with the ten grams it’s missing, I could just give it the cartel as a gift. That would just cut me from a good eight or ten grand in street money. O well, I’ve been wanting to stop this whole small Latino silent gangster shit any way, cut my loss with that kilo and sell the rest I have and try to get a job working on cars or something.

Shit! Must have stepped on a cactus spine or something. Anyway, I’ve got a long walk ahead of me. Man, did that hurt feels like my ankle is getting hot. Wonder if I got all the blood from my girly’s floor up. The bat was washed with bleached rags so not to find any traces of blood and since the local church will take any type of toy for the children, it works out great. Wonder why it’s getting hot all of a sudden, I’m sweating like a dog and I haven’t walked more than a mile. Ankle is starting to swell; I can feel my sock getting stretched and my ankle getting heavier. Going to go and get these guys high and go home and have my baby take care of my ankle, then it’s to the streets to get rid of my extra stuff and vacation time. Wonder if I can go to Mexico alone and get some nice looking mamita to spend a few days with me, nah, don’t know what those poor bitches can be carrying nowa days. Maybe I can take Nena with me, she can get some sun and I can see her sweet ass in a bikini or something. Ah, she’ll be pissed because I wasn’t there last night to greet her from work, as if we are the couple of the year. Man, I’d give anything to be someone else, shit I think I’m getting a fever. My ankle is killing me; I better loosen up my laces. That’s better, ok, onward. I could just take and replace my car, but that would be too suspicious. O well, I can just take and get some weed and make a few more dollars off of that, no, I am trying to avoid that life style. I am going to take and get something nice for Nena and then I am gone for a few weeks and when I come back I can take and promote myself to some company trying to reach their minority quota for the tax year and be set for a while, working in an environment where the ladies wear short skirts and love to lift their chests when they see a young man walking down the same hall.

I think I better take a break, I wish the moonlight was bright enough to see the damage on my ankle. I must be tired, my eyes are starting to get heavy, and the sky is so beautiful at night in the desert. One or two clouds wandering below the half moon above them, the light being blue for the night creatures not to be totally without light. I have to keep going, I am not sure if my cell will have a signal this far from society and the nearest town. Ok, back on my feet and off into the night to reach home and relax and get this ankle checked by my personal nurse, Nena. Sounds like a mission for the deranged drug dealer. Man, when I get home I am going to crash on the nearest couch, this is making me tired.

Reminds me of the time I had to come to the desert to make a deal with some amateurs, they thought they could lure me out alone and try to stick me up. Fuckers figured I was a lucky little shit that could get some weight and they could steal it after they flash me the cash. I get here and the first thing that gives them away is they park in the middle of some natural formed mesa’s that Chicanos used to crash at night after a long run across the border. Knowing that these guys were amateurs from the minute I met them, they gave the hint that they were a little bold in their handling business by threatening me with the setup “don’t leave us hanging, or else” or else what you fucking pieces of shit. They think I am new to this cause I am so soft spoken, they don’t realize that I am constantly looking over my shoulder for some excited fucker trying to jump me for my shit. Anyway, there they are sitting in the middle of the mesas and they are looking as though they are going to some kind of high noon show down, so I get out of my car as though nothing is wrong. In my back I have a 9 millimeter with a laser sight, all I have to do is point and shoot and the red dot becomes a crimson hole. As soon as I get within a few feet, there’s some rustling sounds coming from above one of the mesas and one of the idiots looks up practically giving the first shooter away. So, I get in closer and make sure to be within shooting view of all 4 of them. Before I can get closer the one from the right mesa pops up and it seems he still has his safety on his gun and I drop to my knees and take him out with 2 shots in the chest then the two idiots at the car start shouting to try to stop the two eager gunmen but by then the 2 idiots at the car are dropped by 5 or 6 shots and then I try to find the last shooter. He is probably shitting his pants, but when I get up and start walking toward the car, he jumps out and grazes my right shoulder. I take him out with a shot thru his teeth. He drops like a sack of potatoes.

This walk is turning out to be some kind of thinking session, something that would occur in a shrink’s office or something. This pain in my ankle doesn’t seem to ease up, the sweating is getting worse and I can barely see through the haze of the night air. I think I’ll go and lay behind that large rock, take a small nap maybe that will do me some good.

Ok, it’s a little brighter on this side of the rock; let me take a look at my ankle. Ok, looks like I’ll be a side with Jonesy, that stinging was not a cactus thorn. Scorpion stings are an acquired pain; I guess that’s why I feel so weak. I knew I had a tolerance for pain, but this should have taken me out by now, o well, I guess it’s a good end to this life. Maybe my cell will pick up a signal and I can call Nena and she can come and get me. It’s worth a try…