A FRIEND FOREVER

Mia. Simple though as that three lettered name sounds, it has been the most important name in my life. It is the name of the person who taught me life, friendship, cancer and sad to say, death.

Mia Sandbury is my best friend. We met when we were in pre­-school. Guess what we met over? A forty-eight pack of colour pencils! Anyway, we immediately became fast friends.
Luckily for us, our parents registered us in the same primary schools. Once again luck was on our side when both of us passed the Penilaian Tahap Satu examinations. As our UPSR exams approached, we doubled our efforts and passed with 5 A’s.

Mia was an only child. She used to admit to me that she was lonely. Now, as I dwell in memories of her, I sincerely hope that our friendship took the loneliness out of her life. Mia was always happy and cheerful. She would always crack me up with her jokes. But, I was one of the few people in her life who knew the other side of her. Everyone has another side to themselves, particular characteristics only displayed to ones closest to us or certain features that are not apparent at the surface. She had a high opinion of life and was poetic about the slightest things.

Then, we stepped into secondary school, facing the much talked about adolescence together. We achieved our dreams of schooling at Sekolah Menengah Kebangsaan Ibrahim. By then, both of us were inseparable. It had then become a habit of ours to visit each others houses in the evenings. We did almost everything together, may it be homework or watching our favourite soap opera.

One day, somewhere in June 2002, Mia unexpectedly fell sick. Though I was lonely, I was not worried as I thought it was just a mild case of influenza. Then, she was absent from school for a couple of days. I grew worried as her house was also locked.

On Tuesday, Mia telephoned me. She asked me to come over to her house. There, she explained to me that her family doctor had referred her to a specialist centre in Singapore for a further check up. The results would be sent to her via post. It would presumably arrive the next day. I wanted to be around when the results arrived. Therefore, I slept over at her house that night.

As expected, the results arrived. She opened it first and she said……….nothing. She looked up at her family and me. Then, her voice barely audible, she squeaked out one word that almost brought the sky crashing down.

“Cancer,” she said.

Truth be told, that moment was one of the rare moments where the incessant traffic of thoughts that was continuously running in my head stopped. I just didn’t know what to think. It was as though time had stopped.

I simply could not accept it. Everyone I knew could not accept the truth. How could this happen to her? Why her? Why my beautiful, happy friend? Those were questions nobody knew answers to. At first, I could not even bear to look at Mia. I found it so difficult to accept the fact that my lifelong best friend was suffering from a fatal disease.

A few letters and telephone calls later, I understood that I could not avoid Mia. She’s my friend and friends are there for each other, in both gloom and bloom. She told me that there was a chance of survival. A tiny glimmer of hope appeared in the vast tunnek of darkness I felt I was going through. I was just an observer trying to empathize and help the real fighter through. My distress, if compared to Mia’s agony, was just a trifling pinch
comapred to the hard blows life dealt out to Mia. Yet, she never complained. She never once allowed herself to drown in misery and self pity. She held her head high and was a fighter.

Then, she began chemotherapy, the dreaded treatment. Her hair began to fall out. Mia would always feel hot and tired. Exhaustion constantly plagued her. I hope that I was there for her enough. Meanwhile, everyone in my class had heard the news and every single person was shocked and saddened. We all tried our level best to make Mia happy.

A few months later, I got a call from her parents. Mia was in the hospital. I immediately dropped whatever fickle task I was about to do and rushed there, all the way to the Intensive Care Unit. Mia was regaining consciousness. By that time, she was much better. Dr. Martin, Mia’s doctor wanted to speak to her parents. I unintentionally heard a fragment of their conversation.

“There is no hope”, he said. My heart was screaming. I kept telling myself that it was a bad dream. But, as hard as I tried, deep down in my heart, I knew. My dear, best friend was going to leave me forever, never to return. That tiny sliver of hope I had just disappeared into thin air.

Then, I turned back, only to be greeted by another sight. Mia’s eyes were wide open. There were tears streaming down her cheek. She did not have to say anything. Her eyes spoke a million words. Mia had heard the conversation too.

When she was discharged, I was almost always with her. She knew her days were numbered, but that beautiful girl kept our friendship alive. We were as close as ever. That period of time made us realize how much our friendship had flourished and how much we meant to each other.

“Friends forever?” she would ask me.

“Yes, friends forever and ever”, would be my reply.

Those simple words may seem childish to listeners, onlookers and spectators but to us, those puerile words were just a form of abbreviation to years of friendship.

The next few weeks were the worst in my life. But, they were the last in Mia’s life. For Mia’s sake, we tried to make her last days as pleasant as possible. She appeared to be calm though I knew that deep down in her heart, she was screaming with the sheer frustration in knowing that the end was near and she was incapable of doing anything, just helpless. The same frustration was also felt by everyone, but in definitely less magnitude than what Mia experienced. It is a difficult thing to watch someone slip away from you and all you can do is watch helplessly as the life leaks out of them.

And so, Mia left us all. The memory of her death is too painful to relate. I had a lot of trouble accepting that Mia was gone. She was my best friend. She was the only person that I was extremely close to.

That’s what was so incredible about her. She could she see the best thing about everyone she met. She could look deeper, into your heart, and see the real you. She always had a smile for everybody.

The world is a worse place without her. But it will never be a terrible place because of all the joy she spread when she was here. I will miss her always. But, I am glad I shared a special friendship with her and she coloured my life with more shades than a rainbow could have.

Mia, though you are gone, you will always be my best friend.