Thoughts Have Thoughts

I always hated those false hopes, those heavy stones
that only added to the wonder
and left the possibilities unknown
With phrases like “you don’t know that” and “you never know”
I never could decide which way to go

Then I think of all the times
I just threw my hands up
before I gave myself a real chance to fuck up
The only thing I was was alone
at the end of the line
I’ll never be the trophy girl
I was never that kind, and that’s fine

My thoughts have thoughts
when I analyze everything so deep
No more love slipping through fingers
And no more looking before I leap

I’ll only be mad at myself, for falling down
yet I feel so suffocated
still when I’m not the only one around
I subject my heart to so many tugs and pulls
If life’s a stomach, then mine’s not full

Then I think of all the times
I didn’t speak my mind
when it was clear that something was on my mind
It sickens me to be all alone
at home every night
And optimism never works
No matter what they say, they’re not right

My thoughts have thoughts
when I analyze everything so deep
No more doors keep on being closed
And no more beliefs that talk is cheap

Him and her are running and holding hands
It’s funny ‘cause to me it’s an alternate land
The more I want to hate them, I can’t
I’ve always been the jealous type

They’re exchanging looks that scream “I love you”
Makes me wish I had a place to run away to
I know I’m complaining, I do
I’ve always been the jealous type