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Rated: E · Poetry · Sci-fi · #638984
Parody of Dr. Seuss' Green Eggs and Ham and Tolkien's The Two Towers.
Cooked Coney's and Tater's

I am Sam

I am Sam
Sam I am

That Sam-I-am
That Sam-I-am
I do not like that Sam-I-am.

Do you like cooked coney's and taters?

I do not like them,
Sam-I-am
I do not like cooked coney's and taters.

Would you like them
Here or there?

I would not like them here or there.
I would not like them anywhere.
I do not like cooked coney's and taters
I do not like them,
Sam-I-am

Would you like them in a hut?
Would you like them with an oliphaunt?

I do not like them in a hut?
I do not like them with an oliphaunt?
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them anywhere
I do not like cooked coney's and taters
I do not like them Sam-I-am.

Would you like them in a stew?
Would you like them with a brew?

Not in a stew.
Not with brew
Not in a hut.
Not with an oliphaunt
I would not eat them here or there.
I would not eat them anywhere.
I would not eat cooked coney's and taters
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Would you? Could you?
At an inn?
Eat them! Eat them!
We all win!

I would not, could not,
At an inn.

You may like them.
You will see.
You may like them in a tree
I would not, could not in a tree.
Not at an inn! You let me be.

I do not like them with stew.
I do not like them with brew.
I do not like them in a hut.
I do not like them with an oliphaunt.
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them anywhere.
I do not like cooked coney's and taters.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

A cart! A cart!
A cart! A cart!
Could you, would you in a cart?

Not in a cart! Not in a tree!
Not at an inn! Sam! Let me be!
I would not, could not, in a stew.
I could not, would not, with some brew
I will not eat them with an oliphaunt.
I will not eat them in a hut.

I will not eat them here or there.
I will not eat them anywhere.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Two!
Here's another you.
Two you! You two!
Would you, could you, with your twin?

I would not, could not, with my twin.

Would you, could you, with some art?

I would not, could not, with some art.
Not with a twin. Not in a cart
Not at an inn. Not in a tree.
I do not like them, Sam, you see.
Not in a hut. Not with stew
Not with an oliphaunt. Not with some brew.
I will not eat them here or there.
I do not like them anywhere!

You do not like cooked coney's and taters?

I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Could you, would you, with a mitt?

I would not, could not with a mitt!

Would you, could you, with a zit?

I could not, would not, you fat hobbit
I will not, will not, with a mitt.
I will not eat them with art.
I will not eat them in a cart.
Not with a twin! Not in a tree!
Not at an inn! You let me be!
I do not like them in a stew.
I do not like them with a brew.
I will not eat them in a hut.
I do not like them with an oliphaunt
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them ANYWHERE!

I do not like cooked coney's and taters.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

You do not like them.
SO you say
Try them! Try them!
And you may.
Try them and you may I say.

Sam!
If you will let me be,
I will try them.
You will see.

Say!
I like cooked coney's and taters!
I do!! I like them, Sam-I-am
And I would eat them with a zit!
And I would eat them with a mitt…
And I will eat them with some art.
And with my twin. And in a cart.
And at an inn, And in a tree.

They are so good so good you see!
So I will eat them in a stew
And I will eat them with a brew.
And I will eat them in a hut.
And I will eat them with an oliphaunt
And I will eat them here and there.
Say! I will eat them ANYWHERE!

I do so like cooked coney's and taters
Thank you, Sam-I-am!

Really! You do.
You like every bit?

No, I don't like even one tiny bitses
Coney's and taters are for fat hobbitses!
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