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Rated: 18+ · Essay · Young Adult · #582897
My relationship with Danielle from August to Now
The Story of Danielle

When I first got a job at Stop and Shop, I knew only a few of the other workers there. Those few were people I’ve known for quite awhile due to school. I’d say they made up about 10% of the Front End. I got along with everyone though anyways, but there was one person, one girl, I was especially interested in. Her name was Danielle. I’ve bagged for her a few times, talked about some random things, but still would like to have known her better.
It was August 12th, 2002 and by chance we both had a break at the same time. I decided to go over and talk with her. Just about random stuff at first, then conversation died down quick. What to do now? What can keep us talking? Hmm, just then I felt inside my pocket my deck of cards. Seems a little strange, but why not? So I asked if she wanted to play a game of cards. She said, “Sure, Rummy?” Now we were getting somewhere. That was my favorite card game! I started dealing out the cards, but her break was up. We decided that we’ll play after work since we both got out at the same time by chance, and after work, we went to her car and played Rummy. How awesome is that? We played all the way up to 500 and it took us an hour or so. In that time I got her screen name, found out she was a huge fan of “Silence of the Lambs”, and her best friend Jess got out of work and I met her. That’s when our friendship started. It was me, Danielle, and Jess.
First time we went for a walk was at 1am on August 14th, 2002. I’ve asked some other people to go for a walk around Norwell around that time. They all thought I was psychotic. This was the first girl ever that seemed interested in going for a walk. Could this get any better? She was bringing Jess of course. Going for a walk around that time does sound a little creepy. Well, we chose to meet up at 7-11 in Norwell, I was walking, they were driving. I left a little late so they were already there when I arrived. We decided to walk down Washington Street some more. While we were, Danielle and Jess were talking about something; I wasn’t really included in the conversation all too much. We got to the Dunkin’ Donuts and then decided that it looked like a nice place to just sit down and play some cards, so why not? So we got out the cards and started to play. After about 2 minutes a cop drove by, turned around and came up to us. Danielle and Jess were scared; they’ve never really talked to a cop before. I volunteered to be the spokesman. She asked us where we’re from, I told them I was from Norwell and they were from Abington. She asked us how old we were. Danielle and Jess said 18 and showed ID. I didn’t have ID and said I was 16. Well, me being 16, the cop told Danielle and Jess to take me home, like I would get lost in my own town? So we walked back to the car and with that run in with the cop, we had something to talk about which included all three of us. That was our first real time hanging out outside of Stop and Shop.
During the following days, me and Danielle got to be more playful with each other, wrestling around and such. We wrestled in the parking lot of Bickford’s and got a bunch of scratches, cuts, and bruises, but it was so much fun. We really did make a good pair. The only thing was that we were making Jess kind of jealous. She was jealous that Danielle was getting all the attention and soon ended up not liking her at all. She went off to Assumption College on August 24th, 2002 with a grudge against Danielle. It was pretty hard for me to see this. My two best friends were in a fight and I couldn’t do a thing to help them.
Things changed when my birthday came around on August 30th. Jess and Danielle finally hung out with each other mainly because they both came to my house on my birthday. They seemed to be getting along just like old times. The next day when I was hanging out with Jess, I found out they apparently weren’t. Danielle tried to get in contact with us to hang out by calling Jess’s cell phone, but Jess just completely ignored the call, which kind of made me a little pissed at her. I started to develop my own grudge against Jess. I wrote a little harsh journal entry about her online that she frequently looked at and was very upset when she saw it. We ended up breaking off friendship because of it. The thing was she became friends with Danielle right after. So I’m glad that I could donate a friend to the needy.
From September 1st to September 16th, me and Jess didn’t even talk to each other. Then when I finally decided that I should try and patch things up, we started just saying snide remarks to each other; like comments about each other that were borderline insults. After awhile of talking, we just kind of became friends again once we had everything out in the open. We can laugh about it all now, which is such a good thing now. Jess has become one of my best friends now, I can tell her anything and I have the security that she won’t tell anyone else. The same is for her too in me.
Things were going so good between everyone, especially me and Danielle, but then all of a sudden, Danielle became very distant. She took a liking to a cashier, Jeff, at Stop and Shop. I guess to her this meant that we couldn’t hang out together. We had planned to see the movie “Red Dragon” on the day it came out about a month in advance, but since she liked Jeff, she completely blew me off and said she was going to see it with Jeff on the same day! It hurt me a lot that she would do that. I tried to make plans to hang out with her, but she just kept blowing me off and all she would talk about was Jeff. It was no fun at all.
For 28 days, we never saw each other except for a short time at work. We didn’t talk all too much. Usually when we did talk, she was talking about Jeff and hanging out with him. Hurt a lot. I finally got the hint that I was out of the picture. A little sad, but overall fine. That night however, Danielle started talking to me again, and she wanted to hang out. Talk about a turnaround. Jeff had quit Stop and Shop and I think he blew her off. She wanted to go to the movies. Well, we went to see “Red Dragon” a day off previously scheduled. It was a good movie, and then we hung out at my house, just kind of sat around. Then 3 days later on October 9th, she actually made an effort to hang out with me. She asked if I wanted to see Silence of the Lambs. I said, "Sure, come on over," and she did. That's when I really fell for her. During the movie, she just fell asleep in my arms on the bed. You know that feeling? Having someone in your arms that you care about more than anything? Believe me, there is nothing better. It was just pure bliss being with her.
The next few nights, things got pretty intimate between us. We also had a vicious wrestling match the night when one of the managers, Peter, left to go to another store. And I mean vicious! There were kicks to the groin, mountain dew in hair and face, apple juice thrown, and of course the never-ending growth of scars that appeared. I gave her an aching bruise covering her entire back and she gave me one hell of a scar on my nipple from her teeth. Of course, as the night always does, it ended with a hug. I was convinced that there was some kind of relationship going on here. So was everyone at Stop and Shop. They all said we were dating. They all said we made the greatest couple. They all said this. They all said that. They all were wrong.
I think it was the 26th of October when I started noticing Danielle getting increasingly distant and in some ways mean (not in the usual playful way). On the 28th I got up the nerve to ask her, because I've been dying to know the answer for the longest time, what our relationship was. Her answer: "There isn't one." Stab......right to the heart......"You're not my type." Who is your type? "Not you. You're not even in the same crowd." Would you grind that knife a little deeper please? I can hear my heart still screaming.
This was my period of depression. I almost despised going to work because I knew I would be ignored there by her. Every time she passed and didn't look at me.......stab. Even when she did look at me, it was that piercing stare she gave right back.......stab. It was almost unbearable. I had nowhere to go to help me either. It was just me. No one else knew what the situation was. Everyone got the hint that something had happened, we were talking to each other for some reason. Oh, I wish they knew. All I could say is I'm sorry I liked you so much, Danielle. I thought it could've worked out, but I guess I'm not "thug" enough as you say your type is.
Well, it was Homecoming, November 2nd . The night wasn't all too good. My date, a little freshman, tried to make out with me several times. She just never gives up. I don't like her and she can't see it. I went with her out of sympathy. Last time I do that. She's psychotic. Got home and decided to stay online for the night. Well, I got a phone call about 2am from my brother. He needed to talk to Mum desperately. Turns out, he's in jail. He was pulled over and caught with weed. The best part, he's already on probation. Chances are, he's going to get fried. This led Megan, his girlfriend who lives with us, to tears and I spent a good hour consoling her. I finally got back online and I really needed to talk to someone about this. There was only one person on. It was Danielle. Now, I figured Danielle is straight-edge, but this is my brother. She can understand. Well, not tonight she couldn't. I even asked if I could talk to her about something. She said alright and I told her the whole story. Keeping in mind that we're not the greatest of friends at the time and she's straight-edge, at very least I expected a "Geez, that sucks." Now what was it she really said? "Serves him right." My jaw dropped. How could someone say that about him? I was in disbelief. "Serves him right." There it was right on the computer screen. "Serves him right." There was no more heart left to stab. This stabbed right into my soul and my soul was not going to take anymore of this sh*t! Anger fueled my mind and my body. All I could do at the moment was write out my frustration in my journal. I would have shook her to death if the chance presented itself. F*ck you, Danielle. I hope you die. Better yet, I hope you get fired from the job you so dearly love. I'd just love to see tears run down your face when you're told to get out and never come back. The only thing better would be if I caused them. There is no word for what I wanted her to go through. Hell would be a goddamn vacation.
I found out from a bunch of people at Stop and Shop that Danielle has changed for the worse to them too. She was a pain to work with now. Then one night, on November 4th, everyone just exploded on her. I didn’t care at all. Then to top it off, Jess sent her my journal entry and she replied back “I just want to die.” I couldn’t help but smile and chuckle to myself. It felt good! She was finally getting the treatment she deserved for the way she’s been acting. She had gotten me out of the depression phase real quick and right into the hatred phase. I felt absolutely no sympathy for her at all. That night is when we both exploded on each other. The way it came up was that Stacey, one of the CDH’s at Stop and Shop and also a friend of me and Danielle, was trying to convince me that I had the relationship aspect of me and Danielle all made up in my head. Of course she didn’t really know what she was talking about. She didn’t know what we’ve been through. I told her that and she asked what we’ve been through. So I asked her to promise me not to tell anyone about it. Well, I told her everything me and Danielle had been through. Sexually and emotionally. Now I should’ve known from the beginning not to tell her. She has a reputation of having a big mouth. I really wouldn’t have minded if she told a few of her friends, but she told the one person this was supposed to stay away from, Danielle. Now I can’t say that I’ve kept it to myself either. I told a few friends who aren’t really in the situation. Some of them don’t even know who Danielle is. Stacey however, told her right off the bat. I’ve pretty much lost all trust in her with secrets now. That’s when hell froze over. Let me tell you, that night we made up the word “harsh” in that conversation. Luckily it was online and not in person, we would have had black eyes and missing teeth. She was pissed beyond belief because what we did together was our “secret” and no one else can know about it. Of course at this point, I didn’t care all so much what she felt. Whatever. It’s out, what can you do now? There was a lot of name calling from her such as “f*cking asshole” and a lot of remarks from me such as “Nobody loves you, not even your own mother.” I’m pretty sure that remark made her cry or at least really hit home to her. Stacey IMed me and told me to never say that no one loves her. It went on for an hour or so. Towards the end it was just pointless bickering about dumb things. Then that was that. No question at all anymore. We aren’t friends anymore, nor will we ever be the same.
Over the next week or so, things were pretty rocky at Stop and Shop. Danielle tried to get me fired or at least yelled at by the managers because I made her “uncomfortable at work.” Then a few days later I found some written threats addressed to me by her. Something about her wanting me to die. I just laughed, what was she going to do? The managers didn’t care, I never talked to them. A bunch of people at Stop and Shop were on my side of this saying she really was being a complete psychotic bitch.
Then on November 10th, we got some dirt on Danielle. On the 7th when Aaron came into Stop and Shop and went behind the service desk, he saw that one of the drawers had been kicked in. This roused some talk. It involved Danielle obviously. She was the only likely suspect. Other than her, there was Kay, nice semi-old lady, behind the service desk in the morning. I highly doubt she would kick in a drawer. Well, we told Matt, the security guy to loom over the tape for the 6th after 10, and there it was. Danielle caught in the act, kicked the drawer in, full swing. The manager, Selisha, said she would talk to her about it. That made my day. Now, I didn’t want her to get fired, which she couldn’t for just that. I just wanted her to get in a bunch of trouble. I wasn’t really all that mad at her anymore, I met some other girl and she was getting the bulk of my attention now. Someone new, someone fun to hang out with. That’s what I needed now.
For about a week after that. Things were pretty quiet. Danielle was giving me very evil looks a lot, but that’s all. We never talked, it was strange for everyone because they all thought we were friends and it just felt wrong for us not to talk to each other. On November 13th, I finally talked to Danielle. I came in to Stop and Shop in the morning before school to get an Amp energy drink. Well, there was 1 register open and no cashier there. I was in a little bit of a rush and decided to grit my teeth and go to the service desk to pay for it. I expected her to just tell me to wait at the register. I was real surprised when she said “Hi.” I asked politely if she could ring me up and she did. I gave her exact change and said “Thanks” and she said “No problem.” It’s kind of hard to believe that that was our nicest conversation we’ve had in weeks. It kind of made me feel better that maybe she was getting over this too. This inspired me a little to see if I could have anymore nice quick conversations with Danielle. I tried a few times. One time just walking up to the service desk and asking her what the date was. She stopped what she was doing to look at the calendar and told me. This seems like nothing, but a week ago she would’ve told me that she’s busy or to just go away. On the 20th, I talked to her again a little bit when she was on the phone with our old security guard, Dean. I walked by and said, “Have a fantastic evening.” She said, “You too.” The 22nd we actually said more than a few sentences to each. I was actually up at the service desk talking to her. We talked about Jess, since I was wearing her name tag that day, and a few other things. It felt so good to talk to her again. I felt like we went back in time then to the summer where everything was great. I went out with Emily to see the play “Rumors” that night and hung out with the cast after it. When I finally got home, I saw that Danielle IMed me when she signed off. She just said “Night.” but this was the first time we said anything to each other online in about 3 weeks. Things are looking up.
I went to Assumption College on the 23rd. Hung out with Jess a lot and had some fun. I wrestled with her and I just could help thinking about the times me and Danielle wrestled. I missed those days of her scraping my arms on the pavement. I miss the days of me pouring Mountain Dew in her hair and punching her spine. I missed her more than anything. The streaks of orange in her hair, the Yankees hat, her ear rings, just everything about her.
When I got back from Assumption, I asked Danielle what her plans were for Thanksgiving. She said she wasn’t too sure and I said she could stop by if she wanted. She said she probably would and thanked me for the invitation. However she didn’t come over, but that’s alright.
We did finally get together on November 30th. I’ve been avoiding it and hoping for it for so long now. I didn’t want to get involved in that vicious cycle of not knowing what’s going on again. We were going to get a movie, but we couldn’t find a good one at Blockbuster. So we came back to my house and just talked for awhile. It was almost like the first time she came over and we were just talking. I’m glad with the outcome of that night. It worked out good for us both. From then on we’ve talked at work and online just like in the old days. This brings us right up to now. December 4th, 2002, 3:08am. Finishing up this phase which could go on forever it seems like. Me and Danielle both apologized for the way we acted towards each other earlier around 12:20am. We were both just not ready for a relationship together. I think it scared us a little that we were getting too involved with each other. Now we are back to being close friends again. Who knows what will happen in the future. Only we will when it comes.

August 12th - December 4th, 2002
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