The Fading Light

I am living in a world of loneliness and confusion,
Is this reality or some weird and strange illusion?

My life continues on a downward spiral,
I am all alone and in denial

My life has been shattered by the death of a close and caring friend,
She was only 19 years old, why did it have to end?

I now look at the world through different eyes,
I now no longer have to wear that silly disguise

The person I have become is more serious and quiet,
Although my thoughts are unchanged, I try my best to forget it

Mixed emotions that are running through my head,
Would I be better off alive or dead?

I feel all alone, no one to love and comfort me,
Can anyone tell me why I have to be so lonely?

I want to express my real emotions and let people know the truth about my life,
My aspirations of having a fun job and loving and caring wife

But how can I have a wife when no one will ever love me?
I have tried so hard to let that special someone know my feelings - they regard me as nice and friendly

I'm sick of being Mr. Nice Guy - it seems to get me nowhere,
I am lonely and scared of never finding someone to hug - doesn't anyone care?

I need the courage to say what's on my mind,
I need to let people know that it is love and companionship that I cannot find

Please let me tell them about the hidden feelings of friendship and love,
Do I have the strength within - or do I need a little help from above?

My life is in darkness and there is only one light,
That keeps me shining and helps me remain bright,
And if that light fades away.......

I will have no reason to live another day.