The Matinee

Before reading this story, please read the following:

This story is a bit out of style for me. To straighten things up, this is based on a dream I had, although the dream got twisted differently in writing. There are some odd references in there, I'd be happy to explain any of them if you ask.

This story is a bit shorter than my other recent works, and honestly, it moves pretty fast. Just give it a chance. Thanks.
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I don’t know what to make of it anymore. The shrinks tell me it was all just one big dream. And, I guess, it could have been. But it was so real to me. And everyone is in denial. Honestly, there really were witnesses to this entire event, from start to finish. But no one will admit it happened. It’s that “ignore-it-and-it-will-go-away syndrome” thing, like usual. And me, well, everyone thinks I’m one big nut-bag. People in town started calling me the “Famous Monster” after all of this, since it really has messed me up. I haven’t been able to watch a horror movie since! And no one cares.

Alright, I guess I should get to the point and explain this to you before you walk away. Just a warning though, it could be a little strange and hard to stomach. But you seem like the type of person who can handle it. You are, aren’t you? You haven’t formed an opinion of me already I hope? Geez, you’ll probably be like the rest of them and just laugh at me when this is all over. And don’t tell me that I’ve seen one too many movies, because I haven’t, and this has nothing to do with my movie marathons! I’ve heard that sentence so many times now I could really scream. It drives me insane.

OK! I’m sorry! I’ll get on with it. Shit, you really are the impatient type, aren’t you?! Well then, here’s the story from cover to cover. Got your popcorn?
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I woke up on Thursday morning to the sounds of Howard Stern and Robin. It was a typical day, and like usual I had to head over to school. My clothes were all waiting for me, but like usual I left my clean jeans down in the basement. So I made the mad dash from my room to the basement in my underwear to grab them, and then pack up my book bag. It was 7:30 in the morning, and I had to be in by 8:00, which is a real pisser I’ll admit. You can’t learn anything that early in the morning! But that’s college for you. They promise you can make your own schedule and go in when you want, but the classes you need are all at the crack of dawn.

Anyway, I trudged out to the car. It would take me about ten to fifteen minutes to get to the campus and then I could sit outside and smoke that life saving cigarette before I had to be tortured with slides of ugly assed artwork from the 1700s.

I figured it was a normal day. I mean, why wouldn’t it be? But of course, I get there and the professor has decided that we are going to go look at a closed art exhibit today that’s down the hall. There’s something new. We can look at actual paintings of ugly MODERN art! Gee, fun! I hate the art they display on campus. No one wants to admit that every person has a dark side, and dark art is shunned. And I like dark art. It’s more fun. But instead we have to go look at some abstract paintings that are supposed to be a woman, but look more like a painting of Frankenstein after he was shot up with multicolored ink and hacked to pieces by a chainsaw!

Well, I won’t give you a run down of the entire display. It bored me to tears and that’s all you have to know. Basically, I abandoned the mutilated hippie Frankenstein and snuck out of the room. If he caught me, it would be another cut, big deal. But I made my way to another room being used for displays. I decided to push open the door and look around in there. Had nothing better to do.

So I walk in, and on the walls are all these photographs. Most of them were in black and white. It’s some sort of artistic beauty now. Before it was that no one knew how to record color, now it was beauty. Sheesh. But anyway, I strolled around and took a look at some of this crap. Paintings, photography, sculpture, it was all art even though some of it took more talent and work than others. I personally never cared enough. I took pictures of friends and of my car. Hell, I even took some pictures from the top of the Empire State Building once, but that’s not considered art. No, but this shot here of the guy’s foot is definitely art!

I continued to hunt around in there for awhile. I figured why the hell not. Some of it was actually pretty good, and if I was slick enough about it maybe I could lift some of these pictures. But I spent about an hour in there before the boredom had gotten to me. Maybe it’s time to go. Plus, I was getting hungry and maybe if I moved fast enough the cafeteria would have some bagels left over that weren’t as hard as steel.

So headed for the door. But, I stopped. I found a picture that I thought was pretty snappy. It was, of course, black and white. It was a picture of a girl sitting by the water with a black umbrella. There was a guy behind her in the shadows and I’m not sure what he was up to, but the picture had some flare and some suspense to it because of that. So, I casually took the picture down and stuffed it into my pocket before heading out. No biggie, at least I got one of them.
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After I ate the stale bagel, I felt a bit sleepy, so I headed over to the quiet study lounge. That’s usually a decent place to take a nap since no one is ever in there. It’s a study lounge...who studies?? But anyhow, I went in and made myself right at home, under one of the wooden benches. The carpet’s more comfortable.

I ended up waking up later on...only to realize it was 11:30 at night. Yep, I hadn’t slept more than 3 or 4 hours in the past two days. So that was my catch up. The lights were out, which is typical. No one cleans, so how would I have been discovered? Did I mention I go to Ghetto U.?!

So I crawled out and stayed on my knees for a moment to wipe off the dust bunnies that had decided to move in to my clothes. It took me a few seconds to realize I wasn’t alone in there. I looked up to see a young girl. She was about 5 years old or so, and good lord, was she overdressed! It looked like she was going to a wedding or something! Her dress was pure white and fluffed at the sleeves and the bottom. She had a little ring of flowers in her hair also.

She looked sort of cute all dressed up. So I smiled at her. But before I could ask her what she was doing there all alone, she raised her hand at me as if to tell me to remain quiet. I got a tad confused, as you can imagine. That’s when she vanished. My eyebrow ended up raising by itself till I looked like I was doing a bad impression of a WWF Wrestler! I just kneeled there and stared at where she had been standing.
Then, I decided to find her and got off my knees.
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Obviously, my hunt took me no where. So I headed home to get some more sleep and explain to my mother why I hadn’t come home at 2:00 like I was supposed to. But that little girl wouldn’t leave my mind. It was just too weird for me. It was probably just a delusion since I was so tired. Weird things happen to your brain when you haven’t slept enough.

Anyway, I headed to school again the next day. My 8:00 didn’t meet on Fridays so I was free to sleep in until 12:00. I had one class, Murder in Literature. That was one hell of a class, let me tell you! I’d get up at 4:00 in the morning for that one! It was mysteries and that sort of thing, but we ended up watching the original version of Hitchcock’s Psycho. How can you go wrong when Psycho was a requirement?!

So I headed over. Today we were actually going to take a look at one of the rooms that was considered haunted in that school. That wasn’t the reason we were there, but the entire class knew the stories about the old lady who walked around in that room and the problems with the heating and all that fun junk. No one ever saw the ghost, but it was our claim to fame. We were actually in that room because it was bigger and quieter than our usual room, and we had a date with a quiz.

I sat down for the quiz. Hey, I knew I was going to get an easy A, I’m good at this stuff! So I took it with confidence. But, of course, the fire alarms went off about half way through the quiz and we had to stop. Another fire drill. What else is new? It’s cold outside and snowy, so this is the perfect day for one. We all dropped our pens and headed for the door.

This is where it gets really weird!
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The first guy to the door attempted to open it.

Notice how I say attempted. The damn thing wouldn’t budge. So he checked the window to see if anyone else was around. This was the only classroom on the floor of the building, the rest was dedicated to offices and this particular section had a room with a stage, so no one else was around us. We all stood around the door like idiots for a few seconds! It was sort of funny! But we decided to give it up. It would give us more time for the quiz. So we turned to head back to our seats.

Now, I know I am not crazy. There are 15 people in that class, and they all stopped dead and gasped before staring. So I wasn’t the only one who saw her. She stood dead center in the room and looked at us. She was wearing the same thing as the night before. Only now I could see through her, and so could everyone else.

She stood there with her hands folded in front of her, perfectly still. Then, she looked right at me. “Ryan,” she said. I just looked at her with my jaw on the ground. “You have something I want, Ryan.”

Now I had no clue what I had that she wanted. I was totally baffled by this entire thing. So naturally, I continued to stare at her.

“Give it to me.”

Without even thinking, I shook my head no. I mean, what the heck else do you do when someone asks you for something that you don’t know about, especially if you can see through them?!

She smiled. “Alright then. We can play.”

The entire class was staring at me at this point. It was a really weird experience if nothing else. I just shrugged at them. They continued to stare for a moment before they gasped and moved away.

I looked back to the girl who was standing with her hands apart now. “How about a little fire...scarecrow?!” OK, she likes the Wizard of Oz...what does....

Fire. It just rolled up the walls in sheets. Bright orange sheets. The entire class started to scream and all I could do was stand there. This was not happening! I watched the fire lick the ceiling as the class headed for the door. I watched them as they reached it, just in time for it to be swallowed by flame as well. They all stood back and many started to cry. I was beside myself.

Then, one of the guys bumped into me. It was a light bump, but still, I fell back to the ground. It was a soft landing, almost as if I had fallen on hay. I heard the hay crackle and everything. I lay on my back and watched the flames for a moment before rolling over to my side to push myself up, and....

HAY! Everywhere! Not the ground, on me! It was sticking out of the cuffs of my shirt, and I looked down to see it sticking out from the bottom of my pants legs and through the buttons on my shirt. I was dumbfounded. Patting my chest I felt soft. Oh...my...God. I’m...I’m...a SCARECROW!

I managed to get to my feet, realizing I wasn’t all that stable on them. I just kept looking down at the tufts of hay coming from my clothes. Then I remembered the fire...and the hay. I had to get out of that room! The fire was starting to shoot all around the room like meteors, and if I got hit I would go up like a match is gasoline! I looked around frantically before finding an open window. I started for it, clumsily. She just looked at me as I headed for it.

“You did all of this,” she said as I pushed myself out the window and crashed into the bushes.
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Yeah, well, I was as confused as you are right now. I don’t know how a person can just turn into a scarecrow. But I did, whether you believe it or not. And at that point in time, I was hysterical. Scarecrows are very fragile!

So I headed for the stairs. I figured I could get to the student union building and someone would be able to help me. That was across campus. Maybe by the time my clumsy legs got me there the spell would wear off and I would be a person again. So I went, running in a clumsy, clownish sort of way. I caught a glimpse of myself in a window and was so hysterical at that point that I started to kick up my heels and sing “If I Only Had a Brain.”

But I was stopped by a sight that no one could ever overcome. This is the stuff Prozac was made for. I saw other students being picked up and thrown by the trees, giant squirrels running after teachers, zombies, weird looking animals, circus freaks. Something had to be done. This was crazy! But I couldn’t stop it, I was made of hay for the love of God! So I stood and watched. But hey...the killer birds stayed far away, let me tell ya!

So I shimmied over to a cement wall and hid. What would you have done? Really now! I sat there, out of breath, trying to figure out what the hell was going on. This was just way too much. I even pinched myself to see if I was dreaming, but that didn’t do much other than ruffle my hay.

A pain started to shoot up my leg, fast, to my head. I closed my eyes and put my head back. I tried to imagine it away. A scream. I looked up. A girl stood by me, crying, backing away. I put my hand to the ground to push up, so I could assure her I wasn’t going to hurt her. A human is more of a threat that a scarecrow, especially if she has a lighter! So I pushed up, surprisingly solid. I walked to her, only to see the girl behind her quickly before she vanished again. The girl ahead of me continued to cry, then scream, and run. I watched her go. My hand reached out to her and I went to call her back, but I grunted instead. My hand. I slowly brought it back. It was flesh, and the hay was gone. But the flesh was white, almost gray, and was cut. I grunted again.

I turned around. My foot was dragging as I walked, and I had no idea what was going on. I think being a scarecrow was better. I beat the flames and had both legs! So now what could go wrong?!

That’s when I saw him. Yeah, you know, the sheriff. Sheriff? Wait a second.

He’s...not...human...either. Yes he is. But he’s black and white. OK, my mind is going and I am losing all control! Without another though I headed for the door. That black and white throw back was coming after me, followed by a group of other black and white freaks. The last thing I heard before the gunshot blast was “You gotta shoot ‘em in the head, in the brain. If you don’t have a gun, beat ‘em or burn ‘em, they go up pretty easy.”
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Ah, the doctor’s here. Finally. I tell this story to a lot of people, but every time I tell it I get all sorts of excited. It’s bad memories, you can agree. Wait a second, I need to down this. It should calm me down. Hopefully, I am making sense with this and you are following me. A lot of the times I go too fast after I get to the scarecrow bit.
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Anyhow, where was I? Oh, yeah, the zombie. Oh, I should have told you. I somehow managed to go from a scarecrow to a zombie in about 6 seconds. Don’t ask me, it gets me a bit too. But all I know is that the sheriff...the one from Night of the Living Dead, you know the guy...was after my brains. And my leg was dragging worse. It was really getting unbearable. And it was slowing me down. It was proving my theory that people in zombie movies are just idiots. They run like hell from those damn zombies, but I mean half the time the zombies are outrun by dieing snails! It’s stupid.

But I made it to the classroom, finally. The sheriff was out of site. He thankfully missed me with every shot he took. You can’t ask for better luck than that. Well, maybe you ask for a set of working legs, but you get the idea.

The girl had waved at me as I shuffled past her in the hall. She was standing in the doorway of an office with spider planets that had actually spun webs and trapped the people in them. Huge cocoons, I swear. But I ignored her and hid in a room, slamming a door behind me.

It was stuffy in there. It smelled weird too. Like an odd herb or something. But I ignored it. The pain was coming back again. By this time I knew what that meant. Changing again. I guess that means I beat the initial threat posed by that character!

The girl walked through the door and stood before me. I heard gasps, and realized that 3 students had hidden behind some desks in the room. At least I wasn’t alone. But the little girl raised her hand. Huge threat, the window blinds flipped open. I looked over fast, then back, and she was gone.

My hand started to burn. It was a pain I had never felt before. It surged up my body and into my head. I looked down to see nothing but a small beam of sunlight that was coming from the unshaded window. I pulled my hand away from it and the pain stopped. The scent of the herb grew stronger. I looked up and saw some sort of plant hanging above me, getting closer and closer. I began to shrink away in fear, and against my will. The smell hit my nose again and for some reason I knew it was wolfsbain. One of the students jumped up and closed the shades, and I took that moment to run out of the room and into the windowless hallway. Vampires aren’t so bad, at least I know very well what to do now. But getting to the student union building was going to be harder now. How do I do that without getting into the sun?
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I see the look you are giving me. Yes, I went from a scarecrow to a zombie and to a vampire. You see, I changed when I defeated the main threat. It was just by chance that I was beating them.

I am not lying to you! I was a vampire! You must have missed the original versions of Dracula I take it. I was a vampire in the raw. The way the vampire was created. I even had a cape! I thought it was dandy, but to be honest my threats were different than those of the modern vampire. Yes, it’s wolfsbain, not garlic. Had there’s the trouble with sunlight and mirrors, too.

But...don’t forget the bats.
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You guessed it. I moved faster in the air, and being small, I was harder to catch. So I fit the bat thing well and enjoyed it to the max. I managed to get out the door and get into the shadows. As long as I stayed away from the toxic sun rays, I was OK. So flew through the shadows and the trees only swatted me and paid no mind.

Finally! I made it! The student union building. I waited in a shadow for a cloud to cover the sun and then made the mad dash of my life for the front doors. Other students were flooding the building as the security guards barked orders for them to all head to the multi-purpose room for further instructions. So to there I went.

I flew in to hear the man up front talking into a mic about a young man who was being chased and was the reason for all this. How he found that out, God only knows. So, like a good little black bat, I fluttered up front and became a person on stage in front of them all. They knew I was the one. I was also now myself again.
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I explained the entire thing. The little girl, the fire, the scarecrow, the zombie, the sheriff, the sunlight and wolfsbain, and flying through the shadows. They all firmly believed and tried to help. That’s when we decided that we had to figure out what was going to happen to me next. This probably had to run it’s coarse before it would end, and if we could defeat the threat fast, this would end faster. So we barked out all the famous monsters we could think of. The scarecrow, however, had us all a tad upset, for he did not fit into anything except the easiest way to destroy me.

Yells of famous monsters came flying to the stage. Frankenstein! The Creature from the Black Lagoon! Igor! The Mummy! It! All possible. We started to explain what would be the possible threat for each. We talked excitedly, and then...

No one suggested the wolf man.
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I heard the screams. I also knew the routine. It would take a few minutes for the change to fully come into effect. And most importantly, I knew the main thing about werewolves...they have no control. I watched the hair grow from my hands and could feel it coming from my face. This was the time to run like hell! If nothing else, I did NOT want to kill anyone in this room! And it was too easy for me...it would be like a buffet.

So I ran off, howling down the hallway. I ended up in the bathroom. See, there are these alcoves in the bathrooms on campus. It’s a small, empty room with a light in the center of the ceiling. Nothing else. No one has any clue what the hell they are there for. But I always tended to go in there to read or write or just think. No one really bothered me in there. So that’s where I went...me and my extra hair. And this
overwhelming urge I had to play with a rubber ball.

I knew what the trouble was going to be. The silver bullet. I only hoped the sheriff wasn’t recruited to hunt me down again. His aim had to be getting better at this point. I did see him pop off a few zombies while I was fluttering around as a bat.

The door opened slowly. I just prayed it was only a janitor with a rolled up newspaper. But that wasn’t going to be my luck. Some guy stood before me. He was built like a brick shit house and had his dark hair tied tight in a ponytail behind his back. He wore a white tank top and army camouflage pants. And his riffle was aimed at me.
No doubt he had a silver bullet. And this was one trapped doggy. I was starting to curse myself for picking this place above any other. The one place where I could be cornered and shot point blank.

Suddenly, without realizing, I let out a mighty howl. I was salivating like Pavlov’s dog, too. My body forced itself onto all fours before lunging at the man in my path. My sharp teeth tore his body limb for limb, and then I stood over his dead, mangled corpse and howled. Back out the door. I ran for the multi-purpose room. Half way there I realized I was no longer on four feet, but two hands and two knees. I was me again as I entered the room to the cheers of the students.

But the strangest was yet to come. The dead would keep on rising, but they weren’t as ugly as the ones Alan Ormsby was playing with.
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So I made my way back to the stage, tired and covered in blood. Once again, the obstacle was defeated, and it wasn’t all that tough, all though I was so scared the bathroom was the right place to be!

Plans kept flying and people bustled about. I sat, trying to figure out what was next.
Halloween had come early this year, I must admit. But what happened next, no one was prepared for.

First, it was the raven. It flew in to the room and sat upon the top of the microphone, and cawed loudly. The room fell silent to it’s call. We all just stared as it pecked at the foam on the mic. But even it went to full attention to the loud, sinister laugh that was heard throughout the room.

Honestly, the laugh was familiar. And I should have just believed it because at this point anything was possible! But I couldn’t shake the feeling that it couldn’t be Vincent Price. He was dead after all. But I kept my eyes on every part of the room at once.

Three sets of wooden doors in the back of the huge room flew open. The raven lifted and flew towards one of the doors. I rose from my seat as three of the most famous monsters entered the room. These guys were dead, but hey, I used to be a scarecrow, too!

First, my eyes fell upon Boris Karloff, who entered slowly from the left side of the room.

His walk was inhumanly slow, and he kept his frightening eyes pasted to my face as he walked.

Quickly, my head flew to the right, only to meet eyes with Bela Lugosi. He, too, walked slowly towards me, his eyes wide with anger and Dracula’s cape flapping behind him in the wind his steps made. To the center, where I made eye contact with who I had dreaded the laugh would belong to, Vincent Price. He also wore a black cape, and his face seemed to be mangled.

The three met at the center in front of the stage, stopped, and turned to face me. My heart was racing at this point, let me tell you. I had always admired these three men, but I never really wanted to meet them, mainly because they were all DEAD!

I froze solid. I mean, I was like a brick wall, every muscle tensed! My eyes jumped between the three faces before me. All three raised one hand out to me before Vincent spoke up.

“I believe,” he started very slowly. “That you have something that belongs to us.”

“Yes,” Bela Lugosi started. “Give it over and we shall be gone.”

“No one will get hurt,” Boris Karloff stated in a harsh slam of a tone.

My heart raced. I stared forward, trying to think of what I could have. I looked back down to ask, and the two on the sides had gone, leaving only Vincent Price to stare at me. A smile tightened his lips. Steps.
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My head flew back and forth furiously. Boris on one side, Bela on the other, and Vincent in front. I had no place to run, and the other students had already started to riot their way to the doors. My eyes locked on Bela as he drew his cape up and bared sharp fangs at me. In a panic, I jumped over the stage.

I stood face to face with Vincent Price and his melted, mangled face. His lips were still tight in an almost smile as I pushed past him and ran for the doors. The students were all gone. The halls were clear. So I chose my path and ran. I headed towards the cafeteria, hearing the footsteps coming after me from behind. I reached it and slammed the heavy doors behind me. My lungs were about to cave in as I heard the banging on the other side of the door.

Letting go and running to the other end of the cafeteria, I heard the doors fly open. I pressed my body against the wall as Boris closed in first. He tightened his hands on my shoulders and lifted me up while still pressing me to the wall.

My feet were at least three feet off the ground at this point, and I was wishing I knew what this obstacle was so I could beat it without killing any of these men...again.

Boris pulled me from the wall, holding me steady, and tossed me across the floor. I tried to scurry backwards as Bela pushed me down with his foot and bared his fangs at me again.

“Let him up,” Vincent commanded from behind him. Bela turned his head towards Vincent as if to say “What, are you freakin’ nuts?!” and then finally back to me. He let out a slight growl as he slowly removed his foot from my chest. Boris bent down and lifted me off the ground, returning me to my feet. I breathed a sigh of relief that was very short lived. The raven flew and landed on my shoulder.

“Where is it?” Boris demanded.

I stared at him. “Where is what?”

Vincent smiled again. He walked over to me and lightly dusted the dirt off my shoulder. Then he tilted his head and looked directly into my eyes.

“You know what we want,” he said quietly.

“No,” I said. “Honestly, I don’t.”

Bela stepped forward. “The photograph you swiped,” he snarled into my face.

My face contorted. I knew what it was. The black and white picture I had pulled from the wall. I reached into my pocket and pulled it out. It was bent and torn in places, but I looked at it for a moment before handing it over to Boris. He pulled it from me and stepped back, followed by the rest. Vincent went to him and took the photograph.

“At last!” he said like a kid who got exactly what they wanted for Christmas.

He tore the picture in half, releasing a thick cloud of greenish smoke. They all stepped back. Standing before us was a creature that resembled half human man and half gargoyle. He glanced at the three of them, then at me. “Free,” it forced out in a half growl.

Vincent, Boris, and Bela all looked at me.

Vincent tightened his lips to a sort of smile once again before all four vanished.
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To this day I still don’t know what the heck that thing was. I don’t really care either. I never saw any of them again, and never saw the girl, either. I did some sort of research on the Internet and found a very small amount of information. The girl was supposedly the daughter of a circus freak who ended up getting into an argument with a magician who performed for the same circus. This magician supposedly grabbed a picture off of his desk, did a spell, and trapped her father in the picture, and shortly afterwards he murdered her. So I guess the gargoyle guy was actually her dad. But that doesn’t explain the hell I went through, or the three dead actors. And I guess I will never get my answers here.

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Day 500

Patient still shows no signs of recovery. He continued to tell same story to reporter today. Reporter left in hysterical laughter. Patient continues to insist that Vincent Price is his guardian angel, and that he was once a scarecrow and a vampire. He continues to sit in his room at night howling at the moon until a sedative is administered. This morning he was found grabbing spiders off of the windowsill and biting them. He also developed a problem with his leg and insists on dragging his leg down the hallway. Treatment will continue. I recommend a new proscription.

The End